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This bloke walks into a petshop and asks the attendant for a pet that requires absolutely no looking after. After a few moments the attendant tells him that they have a talking Centipede that does'nt need any attention. The bloke looks at him and says,"You're joking surely?" "Nope, its a fair dinkum t...

Two old ladies were discussing their husbands.One said, I do wish George would stop biting his nails. Its such a horrible habit.Her friend said, My Arnold used to do the same. But I eventually cured him of it.How did you do that?I hid his teeth.

Old Maid & a BurglarA story I'll tell of a burglar boldWho started to rob a house;He opened the window, and then crept inAs quiet as a mouse.He looked around for a place to hide,'Till the folks were all asleep,Then said he, "With their moneyI'll take a quiet sneak."So under the bed the burglar crept...

For lunch the old man made hamburgers. Again, Larry was concerned about the plates as it appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked, Are you sure these plates are clean?Without looking up the old man said, I told you before, those dishes are as clean as cold water ca...

American Tourist Taunts an AustralianAn Australian man was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him.The Australian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation.The American snapped his...

Have a C4 Thetford Bench Style Cassette Toilet in our Sprinter Campervan. The pump failed to flush when the round flush button was pushed down, so I replaced the pump as per a previous Thread on this forum. If the pump was not used once every 6 weeks the pump rotor would seize and I would need to remove the...

Had a PSA test last week and today spoke to Professor Tom Shakespeare, Port Macquarie Cancer Institute. He was over the moon with the result, and so was I! PSA reading was 0.05, a great result. Have had no side effects what so ever, and only get up once during the night, around 3am. To continue having the...

I recently got starlink gen 3 equipment, I have noticed that the face of the router is very hot, is this the normal

Hi I have lost the barrel out of one of my access lockers. Its locked so can not open it. Any body have any tips? Smash /driil ? Have a new set .

My trusty 2014 Isuzu Dmax is approaching the 200K mark and (touch wood) has not missed a beat to date. I have the services done every 10K with oil and filter changed and if I have been doing any significant amount of towing my 2.2 tonne van during that period then I have the oil and filter changed at 5K. I don...

Of the 18 forums on GN only 6 have been active since October 1st. Are we losing interest or members?

Two prawns were swimming around in the ocean.One called Justin and the other called Kristian.The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area:Finally one day Justin said to Kristian. "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark and then I wouldn't hav...