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An old man goes into a chemist to get some viagra, "can i have 6 viagra cut in to quarters. I can cut them into quarters for u says Dan the pharmasist, but a quarter wont give u an erection. Im 96 says the old bloke, "i dont want an erection", i just want it sticking out a bit so i dont piddle in m...

Cleaning the Penguin today I found the roof to be marked/stained by bird or insect droppings also perhaps tree stains.I hate bleach, so good people what can I do.Cheers.Ibbo.

Myself and She Who Must Be Obeyed, (SWMBO) at 67 and 63 repectively plan on doing a 5 year lap of Australia starting in Jan 2010. Just wondering what tips anyone can give regarding what to look for (Damage etc) when, checking the underside of caravans for damage etc. Never had a caravan before so, as Shu...

Hello all this is my first posting in here. My query is about wireless broadband. At the moment we have wireless broadband with Telstra, I happened to be in an Optus shop yesterday and they told me that now Optus wireless broadband is as good as Telstra's. Does anyone have Optus broadband?? Would...

Maria had lost her husband almost...

The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees and sheexplained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine monthslater the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Johnny at the back of the class put his hand up and asks the teacher, are you sur...

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Stay with this - the answer is at the end, and put your glasses on. One evening a grandson was talking to his grandfather about current events. The grandson asked his grandfather what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general. The Grandfather replied, 'W...

Dave06, Looked at new a toy GPS and have looked at TomTom,Garmin. What i would like to know from others on this forum how good they are. I have read some reviews on GPS and of course they are all good. Are willing to pay good money for quality product there for i am aiming at middle to top range. ...

Hey guys I have so enjoyed chatting to you all. You are amazing. But now it has made me feel like I cannot wait 1 or 2 years to be free. Is there anyone out there that would like a travelling companion? I am clean and tidy, a Nurse, so I can work anywhere en route to pay my way, a writer too, not a bad cook at...

Not sure if I've posted this before but worth a read seeing the holidays are upon us and gas usage will start in earnest

http://aldi.com.au/au/html/offers/offers_20090312.htm-- Edited by Basil Faulty at 10...

Well it had to happen, I moved my car at a red light to let an ambulance pass and got pinged. I appealed and had the fine quashed but could not get the demerit points taken back of my unblemished licence which is a matter of great personal & proffesional pride. I am now sueing the *********** for defa...

This is amazing, still I spose we are not paying him to engage his brain before putting his mouth into gear..... Parliament House Canberra ACT 2602 Telephone 02 6277 7820 Facsimile 02 6273 4140The Hon Alan Griffin MPMinister for Veterans AffairsVA004 Saturday, 24 January 2009ABBOTTS COMMENTS OFF...

i get confused with the references to lawn mowing. are we not supposed to be nomads. with our acute water shortage we in the south should not have lawns but should be turning to more natural uses of our lands and landscaping. more native plants, more bark , in the cities more japanese and roman type ba...

Hi folks, Road Ranger came for a visit on his way south, and over the weekend we met up with Two-bob and his ladyfriend near where I live on Saturday, and then went to visit with Mike and Judy on Sunday, out at Sapphire. Had a great time both days, and I hope to repeat the visits on my own as well. Thanks a...

This bloke must be a Public Servant

A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. The female blonde mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. She points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing. The widow, howeve...

There are unwanted messages showing up again . I think the word that triggered the message flood was something to do with Fish or Fishing . The one message informing me that a buddy has a crush on me is okay, but knowing my luck it will be a bloke

I know theres mega lots of different tyres out there for SUVs... Soon the tyres on My Pajero are going to have to be replaced...I am not into extreme 4x4 ..so heavy lug tyres are not what I need...I just visited a local tyre dealer and he suggested Kumho 825 Road Venture AT.... size of tyre is 265/70/16.....