Just Joking

Yarra · Yarra

The new manager walked all around the factory, inspecting his workers, when he came to a room where he saw someone slacking off, leaning against the wall. The manager hid behind a few pipes and watched the employee for 5 minutes. The person didn't move a muscle, so the manager approached him and ordere...

Yarra · Yarra

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer." the man began, "I can explain,"."Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back...""...

Yarra · Yarra

"Late again!" the third-grade teacher sternly said to little Ranger."It ain't my fault this time, Miss Russell. You can blame this 'un on my Daddy.The reason I'm three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!"Now, Miss Russell had taught grammar school for 30-some-odd years. D...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Bob an undertaker, recently came home with a black eye."What happened to you?" asked his wife."I had a terrible day" replied Bob. "I had to go to an hotel and pick up a man that had died in his sleep. When I arrived there, themanager said they couldn't get him into a body bag...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa. When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into her Grandpa's room .... "Grandpa, Grandpa," she says excitedly, "As soon as Grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a fro...

Douglas Leigh · Douglas Leigh

Subject: Fwd: Court Reporter Sent from Samsung tablet. How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces? These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment o...

Yarra · Yarra

A nun hears overhears a bunch of construction workers swearing and decides to head over there for lunch one day...The nun sits down at the lunch table with her little sack lunch and turns to a group of workers and says:"Have any of you ever heard of Jesus Christ?"One worker stands up and yell...

Yarra · Yarra

Douglas Leigh · Douglas Leigh

A husband and wife are on the 9th green when suddenly she collapses from a heart attack! "Help me dear," she groans to her husband. The husband calls 999 on his mobile, talks for a few minutes, picks up his putter, and lines up his putt. His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him. &q...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A Blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says "Two Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident "The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing "That's terrible!!! So many men dying that way!"Confused, he says, "Yes dear, it is sad, but they were...

Redlander · Redlander

How not to,

Douglas Leigh · Douglas Leigh

After nearly 40 years of marriage, Harvey was lying in bed one evening, when his wife felt Harvey begin to massage her in ways he hadnt in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then caressed her shoulders and nec...

Douglas Leigh · Douglas Leigh

Muslim was sitting next to Paddy on a plane. Paddy ordered a whisky. The stewardess asked the Muslim if he'd like a drink. He replied in disgust "I'd rather be raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips!" Paddy handed his drink back and said "Me too, I didn't know we had a choic...

D and D · D and D

A Little 10-year-old girl was walking home, alone, from school one day, when a big man on a black motorcycle pulls up beside her. After following along for a while, turns to her and asks, "Hey there little girl, do you want to go for a ride?" "NO!" says the little girl as she keeps on...

Douglas Leigh · Douglas Leigh

Subject: Question - are there too many immigrants in Britain? 17% said yes; 11% said No; 72% said "I am not understanding the question please." Prince Harry says he doesn't want the usual fruit cake at his wedding. Prince Phillip says he doesn't give a toss; he's still going. ...

Douglas Leigh · Douglas Leigh

ONE Recently, I went to McDonald's and I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. 'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter. 'You don't?' I replied. 'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the...

Moorey · Moorey

A teacher asked the class to use the word fascinate in a sentence.Molly put up her hand and said, My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. The teacher said, That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not 'fascinating'. Sally raised her han...

Yarra · Yarra

A drunk man is questioned by a police officer at midnight, asked where he is going at this time of night. The man replies, "I am going to attend a lecture on alcohol abuse & ill effects on my health." Officer: Really....??? Sounds interesting, Who is giving that lecture at this time of ni...

kiwijims · kiwijims

Here's a few jokes, received from others, "Don't blame me", if you think they're not to your taste !! "THEY'RE JOKES" for crying out loud !! Now, if any of these pictures offend you, USE THE ON/OFF SWITCH !! You will find it saves a lot of bad feeling and stupid remarks by those,...

Cupie · Cupie

http://www.digitaltrends.com/cars/vw-trailer-assist-feature-ad/?&utm_term=DT%20Newsletter%20-%20Daily%20Subscribers

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	A new manager was hired... (Preview) The new manager walked all around the factory, inspecting his workers, when he came to a room where he saw someone slacking off, leaning against the wall. The manager hid behind a few pipes and watched the employee for 5 minutes. The person didn't move a muscle, so the manager approached him and ordere...	Yarra	0	692	10:12 AM Jan 31, 2016 by Yarra
	A police officer in a small town (Preview) A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer." the man began, "I can explain,"."Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back...""...	Yarra	0	777	10:10 AM Jan 31, 2016 by Yarra
	Late again (Preview) "Late again!" the third-grade teacher sternly said to little Ranger."It ain't my fault this time, Miss Russell. You can blame this 'un on my Daddy.The reason I'm three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!"Now, Miss Russell had taught grammar school for 30-some-odd years. D...	Yarra	0	690	10:03 AM Jan 31, 2016 by Yarra
	The Undertaker (Preview) Bob an undertaker, recently came home with a black eye."What happened to you?" asked his wife."I had a terrible day" replied Bob. "I had to go to an hotel and pick up a man that had died in his sleep. When I arrived there, themanager said they couldn't get him into a body bag...	aussie_paul	0	912	08:54 PM Jan 30, 2016 by aussie_paul
	THIS OUGHT TO MAKE ALL GRANDPA'S FEEL WARM & FUZZY.. (Preview) A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa. When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into her Grandpa's room .... "Grandpa, Grandpa," she says excitedly, "As soon as Grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a fro...	aussie_paul	0	841	05:45 PM Jan 30, 2016 by aussie_paul
	COURT REPORTERS (Preview) Subject: Fwd: Court Reporter Sent from Samsung tablet. How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces? These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment o...	Douglas Leigh	2	1075	10:07 PM Jan 29, 2016 by D and D
	A nun hears overhears a bunch of construction workers swearing (Preview) A nun hears overhears a bunch of construction workers swearing and decides to head over there for lunch one day...The nun sits down at the lunch table with her little sack lunch and turns to a group of workers and says:"Have any of you ever heard of Jesus Christ?"One worker stands up and yell...	Yarra	1	784	04:37 PM Jan 29, 2016 by Baggie
	This is The Islamic States favourite car (Preview)	Yarra	0	1003	06:01 PM Jan 27, 2016 by Yarra
	GOLFERS (Preview) A husband and wife are on the 9th green when suddenly she collapses from a heart attack! "Help me dear," she groans to her husband. The husband calls 999 on his mobile, talks for a few minutes, picks up his putter, and lines up his putt. His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him. &q...	Douglas Leigh	0	766	03:26 PM Jan 27, 2016 by Douglas Leigh
	A Blonde is watching the news with her husband (Preview) A Blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says "Two Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident "The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing "That's terrible!!! So many men dying that way!"Confused, he says, "Yes dear, it is sad, but they were...	aussie_paul	1	867	01:30 PM Jan 27, 2016 by grahos
	Safety Chain Connection How not to (Preview) How not to,	Redlander	3	1020	01:29 PM Jan 27, 2016 by grahos
	SEX AFTER 50 (Preview) After nearly 40 years of marriage, Harvey was lying in bed one evening, when his wife felt Harvey begin to massage her in ways he hadnt in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then caressed her shoulders and nec...	Douglas Leigh	2	1149	12:19 PM Jan 27, 2016 by Douglas Leigh
	MORE PADDY LAUGHS (Preview) Muslim was sitting next to Paddy on a plane. Paddy ordered a whisky. The stewardess asked the Muslim if he'd like a drink. He replied in disgust "I'd rather be raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips!" Paddy handed his drink back and said "Me too, I didn't know we had a choic...	Douglas Leigh	0	741	12:15 PM Jan 27, 2016 by Douglas Leigh
	Kids notice the damnest things (Preview) A Little 10-year-old girl was walking home, alone, from school one day, when a big man on a black motorcycle pulls up beside her. After following along for a while, turns to her and asks, "Hey there little girl, do you want to go for a ride?" "NO!" says the little girl as she keeps on...	D and D	0	830	09:32 PM Jan 25, 2016 by D and D
	Smiles - politically not very correct (Preview) Subject: Question - are there too many immigrants in Britain? 17% said yes; 11% said No; 72% said "I am not understanding the question please." Prince Harry says he doesn't want the usual fruit cake at his wedding. Prince Phillip says he doesn't give a toss; he's still going. ...	Douglas Leigh	0	776	04:49 PM Jan 25, 2016 by Douglas Leigh
	ARE WE TH ONES WITH DEMENTIA MENTIA? ARE WE THE ONES WHO ARE AGING? REALLY? (Preview) ONE Recently, I went to McDonald's and I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. 'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter. 'You don't?' I replied. 'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the...	Douglas Leigh	2	1319	10:03 AM Jan 25, 2016 by grahos
	Little Johnny (Preview) A teacher asked the class to use the word fascinate in a sentence.Molly put up her hand and said, My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. The teacher said, That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not 'fascinating'. Sally raised her han...	Moorey	2	913	08:08 AM Jan 25, 2016 by 03_Troopy
	A Drunk man (Preview) A drunk man is questioned by a police officer at midnight, asked where he is going at this time of night. The man replies, "I am going to attend a lecture on alcohol abuse & ill effects on my health." Officer: Really....??? Sounds interesting, Who is giving that lecture at this time of ni...	Yarra	0	914	08:07 AM Jan 25, 2016 by Yarra
	JUST JOKING !!! (Preview) Here's a few jokes, received from others, "Don't blame me", if you think they're not to your taste !! "THEY'RE JOKES" for crying out loud !! Now, if any of these pictures offend you, USE THE ON/OFF SWITCH !! You will find it saves a lot of bad feeling and stupid remarks by those,...	kiwijims	3	1204	08:05 AM Jan 25, 2016 by 03_Troopy
	Reversing hint (Preview) http://www.digitaltrends.com/cars/vw-trailer-assist-feature-ad/?&utm_term=DT%20Newsletter%20-%20Daily%20Subscribers	Cupie	1	1009	08:02 AM Jan 25, 2016 by 03_Troopy
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