Just Joking

Dave Jezza · Dave Jezza

Not a joke, a true story, but made me laugh lots....... until! 3am, second nite in our new (to us) van with ensuite. Darling wife goes for a wee. I hear a hell of a scream, a few expletives, then silence. Wife gets back in to bed, hair dripping wet. "What the bloody hell happened?" I ask. "I dumped the stupi...

Phillipn · Phillipn

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

Possum3 · Possum3

A woman stands over her tee shot for what seems an eternity: looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. Finally her exasperated playing partner says, Whats taking so long? Hit the damn ball! The woman answers, My husband is up there watching me from the c...

Possum3 · Possum3

Have a great day -- Edited by Possum3 on Wednesday 24th of January 2018 07:48:37 AM -- Edited by Possum3 on Wednesday 24th of January 2018 07:51:17 AM

Possum3 · Possum3

A young guy from Texas moves to California and goes to a big department store looking for a job. The manager says, Do you have any sales experience? The kid says, Yeah, I was a salesman back home in Texas. Well, the boss liked the kid so he gave him the job. You start tomorrow. Ill come down after we close and...

Possum3 · Possum3

A farmer goes to a livestock dealer and buys an anvil, a bucket, two chickens, and a goose. The farmer looks at his purchases and says, Damn, I WALKED here. How am I gonna carry all this home? The livestock dealer said, Why dont you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken unde...

Possum3 · Possum3

A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captains parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick...

Possum3 · Possum3

A man and a woman were on their way to get married when they were involved in a car accident. The couple stood outside Heavens gate, waiting on Saint Peter to do the paperwork so they could enter. Do you think we can still get married in heaven? the man said to Saint Peter. He looked puzzled. You know, t...

Possum3 · Possum3

Years of smoking finally caught up with John one morning at work when he keeled over, clutching his heart. He was rushed to hospital and inundated with questions from concerned staff. Do you smoke? Asked a paramedic. No, John replied quietly, I quit. Thats good, the paramedic stated, when did you qui...

RustyD · RustyD

HOW THE INTERNET STARTED, ACCORDING TO THE BIBLE Please do not Google or check this with Snopes. They will lie to you. Trust me! In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy. And Dot Com was a comely woman, large o...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

No one in this town could catch any fish except this one old man.The game warden asked him how he did it.The man told the game warden that he would take him fishing the next day. Once they got to the middle of the lake the man took out a stick of dynamite, lit it, and threw it in the water.After the explosi...

RustyD · RustyD

Possum3 · Possum3

A man is working on a construction site when he accidentally cuts off all of his fingers with an electric saw. At the emergency room, his doctor says, Give me the fingers, and Ill see what I can do. The injured man replies, But I dont have the fingers! Why didnt you bring them? the doctor asks. The injured m...

Possum3 · Possum3

AN OLD WOMAN PROSPECTOR WALKED UP AND TIED HER OLD MULE TO THE HITCHING POST. AS SHE STOOD THERE, BRUSHING SOME OF THE DUST FROM HER FACE AND CLOTHES, A YOUNG GUNSLINGER STEPPED OUT OF THE SALOON WITH A GUN IN ONE HAND AND A BOTTLE OF WHISKEY IN THE OTHER. THE YOUNG GUNSLINGER LOOKED AT THE OLD WOMAN AND LAUG...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

RustyD · RustyD

rockylizard · rockylizard

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Cold shower! (Preview) Not a joke, a true story, but made me laugh lots....... until! 3am, second nite in our new (to us) van with ensuite. Darling wife goes for a wee. I hear a hell of a scream, a few expletives, then silence. Wife gets back in to bed, hair dripping wet. "What the bloody hell happened?" I ask. "I dumped the stupi...	Dave Jezza	1	913	09:59 PM Jan 30, 2018 by Gaylehere
	The Great Pub Debate (Preview)	Phillipn	1	960	08:23 AM Jan 26, 2018 by Blues Man
	Another bad day... (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	1	840	10:28 PM Jan 24, 2018 by Gaylehere
	Having a real bad day... (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	1	980	10:29 PM Jan 24, 2018 by Gaylehere
	You'll never do it. (Preview) A woman stands over her tee shot for what seems an eternity: looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. Finally her exasperated playing partner says, Whats taking so long? Hit the damn ball! The woman answers, My husband is up there watching me from the c...	Possum3	2	895	09:16 PM Jan 25, 2018 by oldbloke
	For Australia Day (Preview) Have a great day -- Edited by Possum3 on Wednesday 24th of January 2018 07:48:37 AM -- Edited by Possum3 on Wednesday 24th of January 2018 07:51:17 AM	Possum3	5	932	12:14 PM Jan 25, 2018 by Craig1
	And, Why? (Preview) A young guy from Texas moves to California and goes to a big department store looking for a job. The manager says, Do you have any sales experience? The kid says, Yeah, I was a salesman back home in Texas. Well, the boss liked the kid so he gave him the job. You start tomorrow. Ill come down after we close and...	Possum3	2	967	04:14 PM Jan 26, 2018 by oldbloke
	How? (Preview) A farmer goes to a livestock dealer and buys an anvil, a bucket, two chickens, and a goose. The farmer looks at his purchases and says, Damn, I WALKED here. How am I gonna carry all this home? The livestock dealer said, Why dont you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken unde...	Possum3	2	801	09:14 PM Jan 25, 2018 by oldbloke
	Where? (Preview) A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captains parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick...	Possum3	1	796	08:01 PM Jan 22, 2018 by Blues Man
	Just Heavenly (Preview) A man and a woman were on their way to get married when they were involved in a car accident. The couple stood outside Heavens gate, waiting on Saint Peter to do the paperwork so they could enter. Do you think we can still get married in heaven? the man said to Saint Peter. He looked puzzled. You know, t...	Possum3	1	760	03:37 PM Jan 22, 2018 by Blues Man
	Do you Smoke? (Preview) Years of smoking finally caught up with John one morning at work when he keeled over, clutching his heart. He was rushed to hospital and inundated with questions from concerned staff. Do you smoke? Asked a paramedic. No, John replied quietly, I quit. Thats good, the paramedic stated, when did you qui...	Possum3	0	841	04:25 PM Jan 21, 2018 by Possum3
	Tne Internet According to the Bible (Preview) HOW THE INTERNET STARTED, ACCORDING TO THE BIBLE Please do not Google or check this with Snopes. They will lie to you. Trust me! In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy. And Dot Com was a comely woman, large o...	RustyD	3	909	09:48 AM Jan 21, 2018 by RustyD
	How to catch fish (Preview) No one in this town could catch any fish except this one old man.The game warden asked him how he did it.The man told the game warden that he would take him fishing the next day. Once they got to the middle of the lake the man took out a stick of dynamite, lit it, and threw it in the water.After the explosi...	Woody n Sue	0	967	04:45 PM Jan 19, 2018 by Woody n Sue
	Dicks (Preview)	RustyD	2	1233	12:17 AM Jan 21, 2018 by madaboutled
	Construction Worker. (Preview) A man is working on a construction site when he accidentally cuts off all of his fingers with an electric saw. At the emergency room, his doctor says, Give me the fingers, and Ill see what I can do. The injured man replies, But I dont have the fingers! Why didnt you bring them? the doctor asks. The injured m...	Possum3	0	759	10:27 AM Jan 19, 2018 by Possum3
	Dancing Lesson. (Preview) AN OLD WOMAN PROSPECTOR WALKED UP AND TIED HER OLD MULE TO THE HITCHING POST. AS SHE STOOD THERE, BRUSHING SOME OF THE DUST FROM HER FACE AND CLOTHES, A YOUNG GUNSLINGER STEPPED OUT OF THE SALOON WITH A GUN IN ONE HAND AND A BOTTLE OF WHISKEY IN THE OTHER. THE YOUNG GUNSLINGER LOOKED AT THE OLD WOMAN AND LAUG...	Possum3	1	857	08:53 AM Jan 19, 2018 by Blues Man
	Black I..... (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	0	762	10:07 PM Jan 18, 2018 by aussie_paul
	What a pisser.... (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	2	1133	08:57 AM Jan 19, 2018 by Blues Man
	Heaven and Hell (Preview)	RustyD	1	788	12:18 PM Jan 18, 2018 by Dickodownunder
	New Year Resolutions (Preview)	rockylizard	1	798	11:20 AM Jan 18, 2018 by RustyD
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