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walks into a pub and says to the barman,'Can I have a pint of beer, and a Ham and Cheese Toastie?'The barman is amazed, but gives the rabbit a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie.The rabbit drinks the beer and eats the toastie. He then leaves.The following night the rabbit returns and again asks for a...

The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets. Al McGuireThe difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert EinsteinWar is Gods way of teaching Americans geography. Ambrose BierceAt every party there are two kinds of people those who want to go home...

Students at a local school were assigned to read 2 books,'Titanic' and 'My Life' by Bill Clinton.One student turned in the following book report, With the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report.Titanic:.... Cost - $29.99 Clinton :......

Anybody able to give some advice on the best way to go from Tweed Heads to stanthorpe (Road conditions, towing van) Google wants to take me via Cullendore. Wondering if that's the best. Thanks

According to the supplier of my new van it is mandatory if I wish to preserve the warranty to have it serviced after 3 months b y which time it will probably have done 1500 klms. Right now its probably done 700 klms and all is running well. I asked for cost and what they did and this is the reply, cost is $550 + p...

Hi All, Does anyone know of a company that provides good service and reasonable prices in electrical and solar installations for RVs. Somewhere in Melbournes SE would be ideal as I am down towards Pakenham way. Ive recently purchased a motor home and would like it checked out for compliance and possi...

Fishing buddy recently bought a Mux. He had previously borrowed my DMax and liked the package so bought the Mux to pull the new van. Old habits caught him put at the fuel pump and he mistakingly put about 70 Litres of 95 in the Mux tank. Vehicle started playing up pretty soon after leaving the Calte...

like you to use the road for their quite enjoyment?. Why I am asking this question is I am coming back to bicycletouring with my dog, mainly on quiet country roads, and last weekend I was abused by a Bob and Marge Grey Nomad couple for being on the road out here. They actually followed me into a rest area, ju...

A story I'll tell of a burglar boldWho started to rob a house;He opened the window, and then crept inAs quiet as a mouse.He looked around for a place to hide,'Till the folks were all asleep,Then said he, "With their moneyI'll take a quiet sneak."So under the bed the burglar crept;He crept up close to the...

For lunch the old man made hamburgers. Again, Larry was concerned about the plates as it appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked, Are you sure these plates are clean?Without looking up the old man said, I told you before, those dishes are as clean as cold water ca...

By the time John pulled into the little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have a room somewhere." he pleaded to the last hotel manager, "Or just a bed--I don't really care where. I'm completely exhausted""Well, I do have a double room with one occupant," admitted the manager, "and I'm su...

Two medical students were walking along a street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart.He was stiff-legged and walking very slowly.One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that."The other student says: "No, I do...

The following is on a trucking companies web site to assist drivers who will be on the highways with trucks: https://centurion.net.au/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/Driver-Road-Safety-Tips-Card.pdf Copy and past onto your browser.

Two Mexicans are lost in the desert after crossing the Rio Grande into the United States. Wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says...:"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk.""Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bac...

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FOR THE OVER 60'S.Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who are interested in them?A:Try a bookstore, under Fiction .Q:What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?A: Keep busy . If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement .. When y...

A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home.On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple o...