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Oh, I Wish I'd Looked After Me Tits By Pam Ayres Oh, I wish I'd looked after me dear old knockers, Not flashed them to boys behind the school lockers, Or let them get fondled by randy old dockers, Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits. 'Cos now I'm much older and gravity's winning. It's Nature's revenge for al...

Twas the night before Christmas - old Santa was pissed. He cussed at the elves and threw down his list, Miserable brats, ungrateful jerks; Ive a good mind to scrap the whole damn works. I've busted my ass for damn near a year, Instead of "Thanks Santa" - what do I hear? My old lady bitches cos I w...

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Does anyone know of some good showgrounds to stay at between south Brisbane to northern NSW to stay at. We have a bigger van and sometime find it hard to get into the small spots in Caravan Parks.

Turn off about 1klm south of Inkerman hill, Which has a great lookout, if you vehicle can make it up the steep road. Good dirt road to beach, withfree camping at 'Funny Dunny Park. water on site, but fuel back at inkerman. 20 mins from Home Hill . I camped on beach further up, through township of Wad...

Do you ever come across simple things that turn out to be epics?I have a daily ritual when dressing in the mornings.Don't laugh,but putting on my underpants whilst standing on one leg,grasp underpants by elastic waistband,lift up leg to slip underpants onto leg.........problem toes catch on unde...

I lived on the Sunshine Coast for 8 years.I visit the Coast perhaps 6 times a year to visit my son and his family.What has become painfully obvious to me is the pathetic,moronic,just sheer bad driving habits that just seem to be accepted.Speed be it on a main road,bye road,and even in shopping center c...

.hmmessage P { PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-TOP: 0px } BODY.hmmessage { FONT-FAMILY: Verdana; FONT-SIZE: 10pt } A bloke walks into a bar in New Zealand and orders a shandy. All the Kiwis sitting around the bar look up, expecting to see...

If you're a senior citizen and the government says no healthcare for you, what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot 2 senators and 2 representatives. Of course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get 3 meals a day, a roof over your he...

After 4mths & 500 phone calls ,debating ,arguing ,repeating ,repeating .repeating, telling them how to do their job & what I thought of them , we finally got our $320 refund plus a couple hundred extra for the trouble. think i'll now go on stress leave .

Has anybody hears rumours/facts that golf caravans are closing their doors

I know we have at least one member living in this area. Stay safe Jennifer, and any-one else who is in the vicinity. Thinking of you all, Cheers, xina.

$10,000 Phone Call An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando , hinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North. On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs...

Has anyone heard anything about the Regans Ford camping area north of Perth being closed. With signage directing caravaners to the caravan park behind the Windmill Roadhouse. Regards GOF and GOG

Tipper Gore discovered that her husband's great great uncle, Gunther Gore, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Tennessee in 1889. The only existing photograph shows him standing on the gallows. On the back of the picture is this inscription: "Gunther Gore; horse thief. Sent to...

EXERCISE FOR PEOPLE OVER 50 Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side With a 5-kg potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax. Each day you'll find t...

Hi all I am inspired by your comments and caring on this forum. I am an avid bush camper in a pop-top hiace. To date I have been travelling with a friend, but am keen to do a few trips on my own. I am concerned about what I would do on my own if something went wrong. It might be something simple like a tick latchi...

A man was sunbathing naked at the beach. For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his privates. A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat." He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you weren't so ugly it wou...

Hi, I am looking at buying a camper/mh which can tow around 2000kg. Your thoughts on 4cyl as opposed to 6cyl engines would be helpful. I am looking at Mazda T3500, Coasters and Nissan civilians as preferred vehicles. I have seen all configurations towing something and wonder how efficient they are. I...