|
Englishman in France
(Preview)
This happened to an Englishman in France who was totally drunk. The French policeman stops his car and asks the gentleman if he has been drinking. With great difficulty, the Englishman admits that he has been drinking all day, that his daughter got married in the morning to a French man, and that he dra...
|
Yendorane
|
2
|
978
|
|
|
|
|
$15 Porsche
(Preview)
A 16year old boy came home with a Porsche and his parents wanted to know where he got the car ? He told them he bought it on his way home. With what money you cant afford a Porsche hell we cant afford a Porsche Well he said this one cost me $15. what his farther yelled nobody would sell a Porsche for $15 where d...
|
Woody n Sue
|
1
|
999
|
|
|
|
|
You know it’s hot in Australia when…..
(Preview)
1) The best parking spot is determined by shade not distance2) Hot water comes out of both taps3) You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron4) The temperature drops below 32C and you feel chilly5) You discover that in January and February it only takes two fingers to steer a car6...
|
aussie_paul
|
0
|
1263
|
|
|
|
|
Te Duck and the Lawyer
(Preview)
THE DUCK AND THE LAWYERA big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator resp...
|
Blues Man
|
0
|
913
|
|
|
|
|
Quite Romantic...
(Preview)
So romantic!!! An elderly couple, who had just learned how to send text messages on their mobile phones. The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy. One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. She decided to send her husband a romantic text message a...
|
Gunsondeck
|
1
|
953
|
|
|
|
|
Logic
(Preview)
|
Gunsondeck
|
0
|
755
|
|
|
|
|
The duck and the lawyer
(Preview)
THE DUCK AND THE LAWYER A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.The litigator respo...
|
Blues Man
|
0
|
844
|
|
|
|
|
Blonde at the Superbowl
(Preview)
Blonde at the Superbowl A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked it. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just cou...
|
Joe50
|
0
|
768
|
|
|
|
|
Amish
(Preview)
An Amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day. The daughter said to her mother, my hands are freezing cold. The mother replied. Put them between your legs. Your body heat will warm them up.... The daughter did, and her hands warmed up. The next day, the daughter was rid...
|
jules47
|
3
|
1002
|
|
|
|
|
billy connolly's routine on a religion
(Preview)
Billy C. has many youtube "hits", but there a particular one that hysterical, about a certain religion. It's quite old, been there for yonks, and over the years I've emailed it to my pals. I was only laughing at it last week, but today when I went searching, it's vanished into the unknown c...
|
Lesley F
|
2
|
2114
|
|
|
|
|
Grey Nomad theme song
(Preview)
https://www.youtube.com/embed/OOgd9hitEAE?rel=0 I think we can all relate to this......
|
petengail
|
1
|
1367
|
|
|
|
|
Framed!
(Preview)
My wife, Julie, had been after me for several weeks to paint the seat on our toilet. Finally, I got around to doing it while Julie was out. After finishing, I left to take Care of another matter before she returned. She came in and undressed to take a shower. Before getting in the shower, she sat on the toil...
|
jules47
|
0
|
1013
|
|
|
|
|
Thief in Paris
(Preview)
A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre. After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of fuel. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such a...
|
brian
|
3
|
762
|
|
|
|
|
funny comments on the london tube rail lines
(Preview)
http://londonist.com/2015/01/the-funniest-things-youve-heard-tube-drivers-say.php
|
Lesley F
|
1
|
1115
|
|
|
|
|
Pensioners.... :)
(Preview)
Two businessmen in the centre of London were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new shop.As yet, the shop wasnt ready, with only a few shelves set up.One said to the other, I bet any minute now some pensioner is going to walk by, put their face to the window, and ask what were sellingNo sooner wer...
|
aussie_paul
|
0
|
886
|
|
|
|
|
Swap
(Preview)
Went to wife swapping party last night. Got a brand new lawn mower for mine.
|
HOOK
|
0
|
796
|
|
|
|
|
NEVER GIVE UP;
(Preview)
For older people who still like the great outdoors...
|
justcruisin01
|
3
|
1028
|
|
|
|
|
Three Nuns went to heaven
(Preview)
Now these three young Nuns went to do the weekly shopping in Mother Superior's little red Mini Minor. On the way, they got T boned by a Kenworth & they were all killed. Well naturally they went to heaven & got met at the gate by St Peter who welcomed them and told them that because of all the new expe...
|
Baggie
|
0
|
919
|
|
|
|
|
Three Nuns went to heaven
(Preview)
Now these three young Nuns went to do the weekly shopping in Mother Superior's little red Mini Minor. On the way, they got T boned by a Kenworth & they were all killed. Well naturally they went to heaven & got met at the gate by St Peter who welcomed themand told them that because of all the new expe...
|
Baggie
|
0
|
886
|
|
|
|
|
She can’t possibly be mine!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Preview)
After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the obstetrician. Doctor, the man said,I dont mind telling you, but Im a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She cant possibly be mine!Nonsense, the doctor said, Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancesto...
|
aussie_paul
|
0
|
1168
|
|
|
