Just Joking

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich. The barman looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck." "I see your eyes are working," replies the duck. "And you can talk!" exclaims the barman. "I see your ears are working, too,&qu...

SLUG · SLUG

An Indian, a Maori, a Muslim and an Australian were walking along an Australian beach when the Maori stumbled over a bottle in the sand. He picked up the bottle, rubbed the sand off it, and ............... a Genie appeared ! "I can only grant four wishes !" the Genie said. "Since the...

Mike C · Mike C

I became confused when I heard the word 'service' used with these agencies: Banking 'Service' Postal 'Service' Telephone 'Service' Pay TV 'Service' State & Public 'Service' Customer 'Service' Bureaucratic 'Service...

SLUG · SLUG

Here's another trick of Doctor Dementia to test your skills... I've seen this with the letters out of order, but this is the first time I've seen it with numbers. Good exampleof a Brain Study: If you can read this OUT LOUD, you have a strong mind. And better than that: Alzheimer's isa long, long way down t...

SLUG · SLUG

Can ColdWater Clean Dishes? This is for all the germ conscious folks who worry about using cold water to clean. John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan, Canada. After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandf...

Cupie · Cupie

BLAME How the world works lately... If a man cuts his finger off while Slicing salami at work, He blames the restaurant. If you smoke three packs a day For 40 years and die of lung cancer, Your family blames the Tobacco company. If yo...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

The teacher asked the class to use the word fascinate in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, My family went to my granddads farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. The teacher said, That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinating. Sally raised her ha...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs. An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?' 'Of course child. What may I do for you?' 'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Italian, a Frenchman and an Aussie were talking about screams of passion. The Italian said: "Last night I massaged my wife all over her body with the finest extra virgin olive oil, then we made passionate love and I made her scream, non-stop for five minutes." The Frenchman said: "...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

An Irishman was walking home late at night and sees a woman in the dark shadows.'Thirty quid,' she whispers. Murphy had never been with a hooker before, but Decides what the hell, it's only thirty quid. So they hid in the bushes.They're wildly and passionately entwined for a minute when all of a sudden...

SLUG · SLUG

Four old timers were playing their weekly game of golf, one remarked how nice it would be to wake up on Christmas morning, roll out of bed and without an argument go directly to the golf course, meet his buddies and play a round. His buddies all chimed in said, "Let's do it! We'll make it a priority;...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

JOKES - ENJOY! Puns for Educated Minds The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.4. A...

Vic41 · Vic41

sucastja · sucastja

-- Edited by sucastja on Tuesday 30th of September 2014 05:19:40 PM

SLUG · SLUG

A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for dinner. This is her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost...

Vic41 · Vic41

Who needs a dictionary when you have dads, A small boy has a school home work > question to answer, so He asks his father "Dad, what's the difference > between 'theoretically' and 'realistically'?" > His dad thinks and then says "Right-o son, go and ask your Mother if she'd &...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? 2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand? 3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? 4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? 5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? 6....

SLUG · SLUG

CURRY CONTEST If you can read this whole story without laughing then there's absolutely no hope for you. Note: Please take time to read this slowly. For those of you who have lived in Natal , you know how typical this is. They actually have a Curry cook-off about June/July. It takes up a major portion of...

The Doo crew · The Doo crew

Arthur and the Witch: Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighbouring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a...

Vic41 · Vic41

One hot summer day, a blonde came to town with her dog, tied it under the shade of a tree, and headed into a restaurant for something cold to drink. Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the restaurant and asked, 'Who owns the dog tied under that tree outside?' The blonde said it was hers. 'Your dog s...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	THE DUCK;; (Preview) A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich. The barman looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck." "I see your eyes are working," replies the duck. "And you can talk!" exclaims the barman. "I see your ears are working, too,&qu...	justcruisin01	2	792	10:14 PM Oct 4, 2014 by KeenTravellers
	BUT OF COURSE (Preview) An Indian, a Maori, a Muslim and an Australian were walking along an Australian beach when the Maori stumbled over a bottle in the sand. He picked up the bottle, rubbed the sand off it, and ............... a Genie appeared ! "I can only grant four wishes !" the Genie said. "Since the...	SLUG	0	717	09:55 PM Oct 4, 2014 by SLUG
	Service (Preview) I became confused when I heard the word 'service' used with these agencies: Banking 'Service' Postal 'Service' Telephone 'Service' Pay TV 'Service' State & Public 'Service' Customer 'Service' Bureaucratic 'Service...	Mike C	0	752	07:19 PM Oct 3, 2014 by Mike C
	yes yes yes yes (Preview) Here's another trick of Doctor Dementia to test your skills... I've seen this with the letters out of order, but this is the first time I've seen it with numbers. Good exampleof a Brain Study: If you can read this OUT LOUD, you have a strong mind. And better than that: Alzheimer's isa long, long way down t...	SLUG	0	827	04:10 PM Oct 3, 2014 by SLUG
	can cold water clean dishes (Preview) Can ColdWater Clean Dishes? This is for all the germ conscious folks who worry about using cold water to clean. John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan, Canada. After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandf...	SLUG	0	664	11:47 PM Oct 2, 2014 by SLUG
	Don't blame me (Preview) BLAME How the world works lately... If a man cuts his finger off while Slicing salami at work, He blames the restaurant. If you smoke three packs a day For 40 years and die of lung cancer, Your family blames the Tobacco company. If yo...	Cupie	0	723	02:35 PM Oct 2, 2014 by Cupie
	LITTLE JOHNNY; (Preview) The teacher asked the class to use the word fascinate in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, My family went to my granddads farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. The teacher said, That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinating. Sally raised her ha...	justcruisin01	1	793	04:54 PM Oct 1, 2014 by Bryan
	THE HAIR DRYER; (Preview) Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs. An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?' 'Of course child. What may I do for you?' 'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the...	justcruisin01	0	640	04:27 PM Oct 1, 2014 by justcruisin01
	THE AUSSIE WAY; (Preview) Italian, a Frenchman and an Aussie were talking about screams of passion. The Italian said: "Last night I massaged my wife all over her body with the finest extra virgin olive oil, then we made passionate love and I made her scream, non-stop for five minutes." The Frenchman said: "...	justcruisin01	0	588	04:26 PM Oct 1, 2014 by justcruisin01
	MURPHY; (Preview) An Irishman was walking home late at night and sees a woman in the dark shadows.'Thirty quid,' she whispers. Murphy had never been with a hooker before, but Decides what the hell, it's only thirty quid. So they hid in the bushes.They're wildly and passionately entwined for a minute when all of a sudden...	justcruisin01	0	645	04:24 PM Oct 1, 2014 by justcruisin01
	XMAS GOLF (Preview) Four old timers were playing their weekly game of golf, one remarked how nice it would be to wake up on Christmas morning, roll out of bed and without an argument go directly to the golf course, meet his buddies and play a round. His buddies all chimed in said, "Let's do it! We'll make it a priority;...	SLUG	0	614	12:44 PM Oct 1, 2014 by SLUG
	Puns for Educated Minds... (Preview) JOKES - ENJOY! Puns for Educated Minds The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.4. A...	aussie_paul	2	2353	12:43 PM Oct 1, 2014 by Woody n Sue
	Desert Army 2050.....Downunder..... (Preview)	Vic41	0	679	11:55 AM Oct 1, 2014 by Vic41
	Over 60's (Preview) -- Edited by sucastja on Tuesday 30th of September 2014 05:19:40 PM	sucastja	1	717	06:13 PM Sep 30, 2014 by Vic41
	being discreet (Preview) A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for dinner. This is her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost...	SLUG	2	705	05:10 PM Sep 29, 2014 by Vic41
	Dad's Dictionary Lesson.... (Preview) Who needs a dictionary when you have dads, A small boy has a school home work > question to answer, so He asks his father "Dad, what's the difference > between 'theoretically' and 'realistically'?" > His dad thinks and then says "Right-o son, go and ask your Mother if she'd &...	Vic41	2	667	12:40 PM Sep 29, 2014 by Vic41
	JOKES - ENJOY! (Preview) 1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? 2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand? 3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? 4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? 5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? 6....	aussie_paul	1	660	11:40 AM Sep 29, 2014 by aussie_paul
	curry contest (Preview) *CURRY CONTEST* If you can read this whole story without laughing then there's absolutely no hope for you. *Note:* Please take time to read this slowly. For those of you who have lived in Natal , you know how typical this is. They actually have a Curry cook-off about June/July. It takes up a major portion of...	SLUG	2	1222	10:13 AM Sep 29, 2014 by D and D
	Understanding women (Preview) Arthur and the Witch: Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighbouring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a...	The Doo crew	1	726	10:05 PM Sep 28, 2014 by KFT
	Blonde's Dog.... (Preview) One hot summer day, a blonde came to town with her dog, tied it under the shade of a tree, and headed into a restaurant for something cold to drink. Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the restaurant and asked, 'Who owns the dog tied under that tree outside?' The blonde said it was hers. 'Your dog s...	Vic41	0	592	01:07 PM Sep 28, 2014 by Vic41
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