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BAR TALK
(Preview)
Walking into a bar Mike said to Charlie the bartender "pour me a stiff one" just had another fight with the little women. Oh year said Charlie how did this one end. Well when it was over she came to me on her hands and knees. "Really"said Charles now thats a change what did she have...
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drongo & wendy
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0
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752
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seniors
(Preview)
Two businessmen in Sydney were sitting down taking a break in there soon to be opened store, one said to the other "i bet any minute now some senior is going to walk by and put his face to the window and ask, " what are we going to be selling" Wasnt long before an oldie came along and asked t...
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drongo & wendy
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0
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625
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viagra
(Preview)
An old man goes into a chemist to get some viagra, "can i have 6 viagra cut in to quarters. I can cut them into quarters for u says Dan the pharmasist, but a quarter wont give u an erection. Im 96 says the old bloke, "i dont want an erection", i just want it sticking out a bit so i dont piddle in m...
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drongo & wendy
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0
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710
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In mourning (a little risque)
(Preview)
Maria had lost her husband almost...
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Roostertales
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0
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618
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birds and the bees
(Preview)
The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees and sheexplained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine monthslater the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Johnny at the back of the class put his hand up and asks the teacher, are you sur...
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Roostertales
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0
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663
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the irish
(Preview)
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drongo & wendy
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0
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599
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The Orgins of Red Headed Kids
(Preview)
WHERE DO REDHEADED BABIES COME FROM? After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician. 'Doctor,' the man said, 'I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. Shecan't possibly be mine!!' 'Nonsense,' the doctor said.'Even though you an...
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Wombat 280
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2
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1160
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Now that hurts
(Preview)
GRANDMA AND GRANDPA WERE WATCHING A RELIGIOUS HEALING PROGRAM ON TV... THE EVANGELIST CALLED TO ALL WHO WANTED TO BE HEALED, TO PUT ONE HAND ON THE TV AND THE OTHER ON THE BODY PART THEY WANTED HEALED... GRANDMA HOBBLED TO THE TV AND PUT ONE HAND ON THE TV AND THE OTHER ON HER ARTHRITIC HIP.. GRANDPA MADE HI...
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Wombat 280
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0
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742
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Old language take
(Preview)
Why is it ok to say I pricked my finger but not ok to say I fingered my p****
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Roostertales
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0
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603
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Heard on the radio the other day
(Preview)
Confucius say man who has many daughters and only one bathroom . . . . . .seldom gets into hot water
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Roostertales
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1
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598
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THE BLONDE MORTICIAN
(Preview)
A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. The female blonde mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. She points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing. The widow, howeve...
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sgntbilko
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4
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1023
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Stupid questions,stupid answers
(Preview)
No.1 Italian Garden An old Italianman lived alone in the country.He wanted to dig his tomato garden,but it was very hard work as the ground was hard.His only son,Vincent, who used to help him,was in prison.The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament. Dear Vincent, I am feeling...
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The Gnome
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0
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745
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Don't laugh at these sick jokes! sniger, Giggle.
(Preview)
Two elderly women were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel's ear and she said, ''Mabel, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?' Mabel answered, 'I have a suppository in my ear?' She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, 'Et...
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Road Ranger
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0
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696
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asian banker
(Preview)
I was in the bank the other day and this asian lady was wanting to change her yen to dollars and she was a little irate. She asked the teller "why it chane yedaday i get two hunat dolla for my yen toyay i get one an eighty dolla for my yen' The teller says its "fluctuation" The asian la...
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drongo & wendy
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1
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648
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BIRD FEEDER
(Preview)
I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed.. What a beauty of a bird feeder it was, as I filled it lovingly with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food. But then the birds started building nests in...
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sgntbilko
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1
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844
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the good life
(Preview)
An escaped prisoner has been arrested in the US after guards caught him trying to sneak back into the jail. Harry Jackson, 25, was spotted trying to slip back into the prison with 14 packs of cigarettes allegedly stolen from a nearby shop, authorities said. Sheriff Tommy Gregory said Jackson had open...
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mike and Judy
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0
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636
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dont mess with us!!!!
(Preview)
Two businessmen in Florida were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, 'I bet any minute now some senior is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we're selling.' No sooner were the...
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dave06
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0
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729
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Note to self: 'Cancel credit cards prior to death!
(Preview)
Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die! This is so priceless and so easy to see happening - customer service, being what it is today! A lady died this past January, and ANZ bank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then added late fe...
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mike and Judy
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0
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733
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Automation
(Preview)
The outgoing message: Hello ! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member, please listen to all the options before making a selection: To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1 To make excuses for why your child d...
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Wombat 280
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1
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619
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Eve's Story As told By Eve
(Preview)
EVE'S SIDE OF THE STORY..... and we are sticking with it !! After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. 'So, how is everything going?' inquired God. 'It is all so beautiful, God,' she replied. 'The sunrises and sunsets Are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything i...
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Wombat 280
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0
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878
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