Just Joking

Vic41 · Vic41

Sometimes....when you cry.... no one sees your tears. Sometimes....when you are in pain.... no one sees your hurt. Sometimes....when you are worried.... no one sees your stress. Sometimes....when you are happy.... no one sees your smile. But FART !! just ONE friggin' time..... And everybody not...

Vic41 · Vic41

Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken." She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed. My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, and...

Vic41 · Vic41

'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.' The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano?' 'Yes, Father, it is.' 'And who was the girl you were with?' ! 'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation.' 'Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later...

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

Why is it so....?? Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one? Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with? If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes? If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? Why is a per...

Vic41 · Vic41

Theatre Seats for Seniors An old man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the movie theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man, "Sorry sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The old man didn't budge. The usher became more impatient. "...

Vic41 · Vic41

Hot and Cold Sex: After an examination, the doctor said to his patient: 'You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about?' 'In fact, I do.' said the old man. "After my wife and I have sex, I'm usually cold and chilly; and then, after I have sex with her t...

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

This is probably the best Prayer for any "older" couple before bedtime..

Hendo · Hendo

Mick and Paddy have been invited to a party. They turn up, only to find out its a fancy dress party but the host tells them they cant come in unless they are dressed as an emotion. Whats an emotions? asks Mick. The host points to a lady dressed entirely in green. Shes come as Envy and that bloke over there dr...

Vic41 · Vic41

A policeman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well; however, the policeman kept feeling something pulling at his pubic hairs . He was worried that it might be something the doctors hadn't told him about it. He finally had enough e...

Vic41 · Vic41

A man and his wife moved back home to Saskatchewan, from Vancouver. The wife had a wooden leg and to insure it in BC (British Columbia) was $2000.00 a year! When they arrived in Saskatchewan, they went to an Insurance agency to see how much it would cost to insure the wooden leg. The agent looked it up on t...

Peterpan · Peterpan

You can blame Vic41 he started it. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta. I put a worm on my tongue and now I'm waiting with baited breath. A will is a dead giveaway. Kevin

Vic41 · Vic41

These were posted on an Australian tourism website, and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for cretins!) _________________________ _______________________ Q: Does it eve...

Vic41 · Vic41

The Air Canada plane leaves Pearson Airport under the control of a Jewish captain - his co-pilot is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together and an awkward silence between the two seems to indicate a mutual dislike. Once they reach cruising altitude, the Jewish ccaptain activates th...

Vic41 · Vic41

· I tried to catch some fog. I mist. · When chemists die, they barium. · Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. · A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. · I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time. · How does Moses make h...

JayDee · JayDee

Black Panties Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the dating world.Finally, Anna said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "Mom I have someone for you to meet." Wel...

Vic41 · Vic41

A jet is making its final approach to St. John's Airport. The pilot comes on the intercom, 'This is your Captain. We're on our final descent into St. John's Newfoundland. I want to thank you all for flying with us today and hope you enjoy your stay on the "ROCK". He forgets to switch off the int...

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

Back on July 9th, a group of Pekin, Illinois bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off the Murray Baker Bridge. So they stopped. George, their leader, a big burly man of 53, gets off his Harley, walks through a group of gawkers, past the State Trooper who was trying to talk her do...

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, British scientists foundtraces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusionthat their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago. Not to be outdone by the British, in the weeks that followed, an Americanarcha...

rtv47 · rtv47

mongrel · mongrel

Enjoy! the caption is: I'm off to get my eyes checked, you need a shave and your tie is crooked! -- Edited by mongrel on Sunday 9th of March 2014 08:00:00 AM

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Sometimes.... (Preview) Sometimes....when you cry.... no one sees your tears. Sometimes....when you are in pain.... no one sees your hurt. Sometimes....when you are worried.... no one sees your stress. Sometimes....when you are happy.... no one sees your smile. But FART !! just ONE friggin' time..... And everybody not...	Vic41	0	623	11:04 AM Mar 13, 2014 by Vic41
	Boys Favourite Animal (Preview) Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken." She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed. My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, and...	Vic41	0	681	11:00 AM Mar 13, 2014 by Vic41
	Alter Boy Confession..... (Preview) 'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.' The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano?' 'Yes, Father, it is.' 'And who was the girl you were with?' ! 'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation.' 'Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later...	Vic41	0	565	10:54 AM Mar 13, 2014 by Vic41
	I Have Questions... (Preview) Why is it so....?? Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one? Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with? If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes? If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? Why is a per...	Gunsondeck	1	735	10:09 AM Mar 13, 2014 by Peterpan
	Seniors Theatre Seating..... (Preview) Theatre Seats for Seniors An old man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the movie theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man, "Sorry sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The old man didn't budge. The usher became more impatient. "...	Vic41	2	665	11:07 PM Mar 12, 2014 by Vic41
	Hot and Cold Seniors Sex (Preview) Hot and Cold Sex: After an examination, the doctor said to his patient: 'You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about?' 'In fact, I do.' said the old man. "After my wife and I have sex, I'm usually cold and chilly; and then, after I have sex with her t...	Vic41	2	848	11:05 PM Mar 12, 2014 by Vic41
	Guidance... (Preview) This is probably the best Prayer for any "older" couple before bedtime..	Gunsondeck	9	703	07:29 PM Mar 12, 2014 by JRH
	Mick & Paddy - Rated XXX (Preview) Mick and Paddy have been invited to a party. They turn up, only to find out its a fancy dress party but the host tells them they cant come in unless they are dressed as an emotion. Whats an emotions? asks Mick. The host points to a lady dressed entirely in green. Shes come as Envy and that bloke over there dr...	Hendo	0	691	03:55 PM Mar 12, 2014 by Hendo
	The Policeman and The Nurse.... (Preview) A policeman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well; however, the policeman kept feeling something pulling at his pubic hairs . He was worried that it might be something the doctors hadn't told him about it. He finally had enough e...	Vic41	0	831	05:18 PM Mar 11, 2014 by Vic41
	Canadian Insurance.... (Preview) A man and his wife moved back home to Saskatchewan, from Vancouver. The wife had a wooden leg and to insure it in BC (British Columbia) was $2000.00 a year! When they arrived in Saskatchewan, they went to an Insurance agency to see how much it would cost to insure the wooden leg. The agent looked it up on t...	Vic41	0	605	05:15 PM Mar 11, 2014 by Vic41
	A Couple More. (Preview) You can blame Vic41 he started it. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta. I put a worm on my tongue and now I'm waiting with baited breath. A will is a dead giveaway. Kevin	Peterpan	4	703	12:46 PM Mar 11, 2014 by Hendo
	Travel Humour - Tourists Website (Preview) These were posted on an Australian tourism website, and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for cretins!) _________________________ _______________________ Q: Does it eve...	Vic41	4	887	10:24 PM Mar 10, 2014 by Vic41
	Pilot to Co-Pilot.... (Preview) The Air Canada plane leaves Pearson Airport under the control of a Jewish captain - his co-pilot is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together and an awkward silence between the two seems to indicate a mutual dislike. Once they reach cruising altitude, the Jewish ccaptain activates th...	Vic41	0	728	09:01 AM Mar 10, 2014 by Vic41
	PUNOGRAPHY ( 1 2 ) (Preview) · I tried to catch some fog. I mist. · When chemists die, they barium. · Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. · A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. · I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time. · How does Moses make h...	Vic41	42	1738	10:14 PM Mar 9, 2014 by Peterpan
	Where there is a will--ie there is a way. Black panties. (Preview) Black Panties Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the dating world.Finally, Anna said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "Mom I have someone for you to meet." Wel...	JayDee	0	604	04:13 PM Mar 9, 2014 by JayDee
	Plane Crew.... (Preview) A jet is making its final approach to St. John's Airport. The pilot comes on the intercom, 'This is your Captain. We're on our final descent into St. John's Newfoundland. I want to thank you all for flying with us today and hope you enjoy your stay on the "ROCK". He forgets to switch off the int...	Vic41	1	606	03:59 PM Mar 9, 2014 by Big Gorilla
	Last Kiss... (Preview) Back on July 9th, a group of Pekin, Illinois bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off the Murray Baker Bridge. So they stopped. George, their leader, a big burly man of 53, gets off his Harley, walks through a group of gawkers, past the State Trooper who was trying to talk her do...	Gunsondeck	0	673	03:04 PM Mar 9, 2014 by Gunsondeck
	Conclusions (Preview) After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, British scientists foundtraces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusionthat their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago. Not to be outdone by the British, in the weeks that followed, an Americanarcha...	Gunsondeck	0	475	02:45 PM Mar 9, 2014 by Gunsondeck
	politics !!!!!!!!! (Preview)	rtv47	0	576	10:13 AM Mar 9, 2014 by rtv47
	New specs (Preview) Enjoy! the caption is: I'm off to get my eyes checked, you need a shave and your tie is crooked! -- Edited by mongrel on Sunday 9th of March 2014 08:00:00 AM	mongrel	0	528	07:59 AM Mar 9, 2014 by mongrel
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