Just Joking

Vic41 · Vic41

A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, 'You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking.' The cat thought for a minute and then said 'All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.' God sai...

SLUG · SLUG

Little Johnny walked into class every morning with a black eye. After a number of times of this happening, the teacher became increasingly worried and asked him about it. Johnny's answer was: "Our house is very small miss. Me, my mother and my father, we sleep on the same bed. Every night my fathe...

SLUG · SLUG

- Subject: Life as a Poor pensioner A PENSIONER'S LIFE IS NOT WHAT I THOUGHT IT TO BE, ..BUT I WILL NOT DESPAIR I TOO AM AFFECTED BY THE ECONOMIC CRISIS. PROOF I HAVE TO EAT MOULDY CHEESE. AND DRIED MEAT I HAVE TO DRINK OLD WINE MY CAR HAS NOT GOT A ROOF AND MY BATHTUB IS IN THE GARDEN But I will continue to strugg...

SLUG · SLUG

A FARMER IN YORKSHIRE SEES A MAN DRINKING FROM HIS STREAM so he shouts to him..... Ey up ****er, tha dunt wanna be drinkin watta frum theer, Its full o hoss piss an cow ****e an it could kill thee The man says: "Excuse me Sir, I am a Muslim from Pakistan , Can you be speaking clearer and slower please The...

dING · dING

Reflections An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick's Catholic Church. 'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since my last confession. I had sex with Fanny Green twice last month.' The priest told the sinner, 'You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's.' Soon thereafter, anot...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Andrew the drover from a huge cattle station in the Australian outback appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. "Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked. "Well, I can think of one thing," the drover offered. "Once, on a trip to...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don...

Joe50 · Joe50

Don't miss it and watch to the end...very short!!! Turn up sound. http://biggeekdad.com/2010/10/side-by-side/

Vic41 · Vic41

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

A Jewish man and his wife are having dinner at a very fine restaurant when an absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a long passionate kiss and says to him, "I'll see you later". "Who the hell was that?" says the wife. "That was my mist...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich. The barman looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck." "I see your eyes are working," replies the duck. "And you can talk!" exclaims the barman. "I see your ears are working, too,&qu...

SLUG · SLUG

An Indian, a Maori, a Muslim and an Australian were walking along an Australian beach when the Maori stumbled over a bottle in the sand. He picked up the bottle, rubbed the sand off it, and ............... a Genie appeared ! "I can only grant four wishes !" the Genie said. "Since the...

Mike C · Mike C

I became confused when I heard the word 'service' used with these agencies: Banking 'Service' Postal 'Service' Telephone 'Service' Pay TV 'Service' State & Public 'Service' Customer 'Service' Bureaucratic 'Service...

SLUG · SLUG

Here's another trick of Doctor Dementia to test your skills... I've seen this with the letters out of order, but this is the first time I've seen it with numbers. Good exampleof a Brain Study: If you can read this OUT LOUD, you have a strong mind. And better than that: Alzheimer's isa long, long way down t...

SLUG · SLUG

Can ColdWater Clean Dishes? This is for all the germ conscious folks who worry about using cold water to clean. John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan, Canada. After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandf...

Cupie · Cupie

BLAME How the world works lately... If a man cuts his finger off while Slicing salami at work, He blames the restaurant. If you smoke three packs a day For 40 years and die of lung cancer, Your family blames the Tobacco company. If yo...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

The teacher asked the class to use the word fascinate in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, My family went to my granddads farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. The teacher said, That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinating. Sally raised her ha...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs. An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?' 'Of course child. What may I do for you?' 'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Italian, a Frenchman and an Aussie were talking about screams of passion. The Italian said: "Last night I massaged my wife all over her body with the finest extra virgin olive oil, then we made passionate love and I made her scream, non-stop for five minutes." The Frenchman said: "...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

An Irishman was walking home late at night and sees a woman in the dark shadows.'Thirty quid,' she whispers. Murphy had never been with a hooker before, but Decides what the hell, it's only thirty quid. So they hid in the bushes.They're wildly and passionately entwined for a minute when all of a sudden...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Animal Heaven... (Preview) A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, 'You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking.' The cat thought for a minute and then said 'All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.' God sai...	Vic41	0	620	02:16 AM Oct 8, 2014 by Vic41
	JOHNYS BLACK EYE (Preview) Little Johnny walked into class every morning with a black eye. After a number of times of this happening, the teacher became increasingly worried and asked him about it. Johnny's answer was: "Our house is very small miss. Me, my mother and my father, we sleep on the same bed. Every night my fathe...	SLUG	0	556	02:08 AM Oct 8, 2014 by SLUG
	LIFE AS A PENSIONER (Preview) - Subject: Life as a Poor pensioner A PENSIONER'S LIFE IS NOT WHAT I THOUGHT IT TO BE, ..BUT I WILL NOT DESPAIR I TOO AM AFFECTED BY THE ECONOMIC CRISIS. PROOF I HAVE TO EAT MOULDY CHEESE. AND DRIED MEAT I HAVE TO DRINK OLD WINE MY CAR HAS NOT GOT A ROOF AND MY BATHTUB IS IN THE GARDEN But I will continue to strugg...	SLUG	0	619	02:05 AM Oct 8, 2014 by SLUG
	THE YORKSHIRE FARMER (Preview) A FARMER IN YORKSHIRE SEES A MAN DRINKING FROM HIS STREAM so he shouts to him..... Ey up **er, tha dunt wanna be drinkin watta frum theer, Its full o hoss piss an cow **e an it could kill thee The man says: "Excuse me Sir, I am a Muslim from Pakistan , Can you be speaking clearer and slower please The...	SLUG	0	688	02:02 AM Oct 8, 2014 by SLUG
	Reflections (Preview) Reflections An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick's Catholic Church. 'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since my last confession. I had sex with Fanny Green twice last month.' The priest told the sinner, 'You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's.' Soon thereafter, anot...	dING	0	752	12:42 PM Oct 7, 2014 by dING
	Andrew the drover from a huge cattle station.. (Preview) Andrew the drover from a huge cattle station in the Australian outback appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. "Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked. "Well, I can think of one thing," the drover offered. "Once, on a trip to...	aussie_paul	0	752	02:53 PM Oct 6, 2014 by aussie_paul
	OLD FRIENDS.. (Preview) Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don...	aussie_paul	0	812	12:56 PM Oct 6, 2014 by aussie_paul
	Wedding night in the Seniors' Lodge (Preview) *Don't miss it and watch to the end...very short!!! Turn up sound.* *http://biggeekdad.com/2010/10/side-by-side/*	Joe50	3	1186	11:58 PM Oct 5, 2014 by D and D
	Holy War.......... (Preview)	Vic41	3	1072	11:48 PM Oct 5, 2014 by D and D
	Jewish Mistress (Preview) A Jewish man and his wife are having dinner at a very fine restaurant when an absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a long passionate kiss and says to him, "I'll see you later". "Who the hell was that?" says the wife. "That was my mist...	Gunsondeck	0	965	11:55 AM Oct 5, 2014 by Gunsondeck
	THE DUCK;; (Preview) A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich. The barman looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck." "I see your eyes are working," replies the duck. "And you can talk!" exclaims the barman. "I see your ears are working, too,&qu...	justcruisin01	2	779	10:14 PM Oct 4, 2014 by KeenTravellers
	BUT OF COURSE (Preview) An Indian, a Maori, a Muslim and an Australian were walking along an Australian beach when the Maori stumbled over a bottle in the sand. He picked up the bottle, rubbed the sand off it, and ............... a Genie appeared ! "I can only grant four wishes !" the Genie said. "Since the...	SLUG	0	704	09:55 PM Oct 4, 2014 by SLUG
	Service (Preview) I became confused when I heard the word 'service' used with these agencies: Banking 'Service' Postal 'Service' Telephone 'Service' Pay TV 'Service' State & Public 'Service' Customer 'Service' Bureaucratic 'Service...	Mike C	0	733	07:19 PM Oct 3, 2014 by Mike C
	yes yes yes yes (Preview) Here's another trick of Doctor Dementia to test your skills... I've seen this with the letters out of order, but this is the first time I've seen it with numbers. Good exampleof a Brain Study: If you can read this OUT LOUD, you have a strong mind. And better than that: Alzheimer's isa long, long way down t...	SLUG	0	803	04:10 PM Oct 3, 2014 by SLUG
	can cold water clean dishes (Preview) Can ColdWater Clean Dishes? This is for all the germ conscious folks who worry about using cold water to clean. John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan, Canada. After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandf...	SLUG	0	651	11:47 PM Oct 2, 2014 by SLUG
	Don't blame me (Preview) BLAME How the world works lately... If a man cuts his finger off while Slicing salami at work, He blames the restaurant. If you smoke three packs a day For 40 years and die of lung cancer, Your family blames the Tobacco company. If yo...	Cupie	0	712	02:35 PM Oct 2, 2014 by Cupie
	LITTLE JOHNNY; (Preview) The teacher asked the class to use the word fascinate in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, My family went to my granddads farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. The teacher said, That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinating. Sally raised her ha...	justcruisin01	1	779	04:54 PM Oct 1, 2014 by Bryan
	THE HAIR DRYER; (Preview) Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs. An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?' 'Of course child. What may I do for you?' 'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the...	justcruisin01	0	625	04:27 PM Oct 1, 2014 by justcruisin01
	THE AUSSIE WAY; (Preview) Italian, a Frenchman and an Aussie were talking about screams of passion. The Italian said: "Last night I massaged my wife all over her body with the finest extra virgin olive oil, then we made passionate love and I made her scream, non-stop for five minutes." The Frenchman said: "...	justcruisin01	0	572	04:26 PM Oct 1, 2014 by justcruisin01
	MURPHY; (Preview) An Irishman was walking home late at night and sees a woman in the dark shadows.'Thirty quid,' she whispers. Murphy had never been with a hooker before, but Decides what the hell, it's only thirty quid. So they hid in the bushes.They're wildly and passionately entwined for a minute when all of a sudden...	justcruisin01	0	628	04:24 PM Oct 1, 2014 by justcruisin01
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