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Cheap Parrot.
(Preview)
A woman went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large, beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage that said $20.00. ... "Why so cheap?" she asked the pet store owner. The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you that this bird used to live in a house of prostitution and sometimes it say...
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Possum3
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0
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975
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A priest, an imam and a rabbit walk into a bar
(Preview)
A priest, an imam and a rabbit walk into a bar. The priest says, "I believe that God sent his only son to die for our sins" The Imam says, "I believe Allah sent his last prophet to show us how to live" The rabbit says, "I believe I'm a typo."
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dorian
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0
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1056
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Barbie.
(Preview)
Ralph is driving home one evening, when he suddenly realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present. He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store, and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that Barbie in the window?" In a condescending manner, she says, "Which Barbie?" S...
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Possum3
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0
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869
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Rapid response.
(Preview)
.................................................................................................
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Possum3
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1
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946
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Dr Examination.
(Preview)
A woman went to the doctors office for her annual examination. Suddenly, another older doctor noticed her burst out of the examination room, screaming as she ran down the hall. He stopped the hysterical woman and asked her to sit down and relax. Then, he asked her what she was so upset about. A few minut...
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Possum3
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0
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910
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Paddy & Shamus.
(Preview)
An Aerlingus flight was due to land As they approached Dublin number 1 runway for the first ever landing, the tower heard: PILOT - Bjeesus will ya look how fookin shart dat runway is? CO-PILOT - Yer nat fookin kiddin, Paddy PILOT - Dis is ganna be one a de trickiest landings ever, Shamus !... CO-PILOT - Ye...
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Possum3
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0
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731
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For the afterlife.
(Preview)
There was a man who had worked all of his life and had saved all of his money. He was a real miser when it came to his money. He loved money more than just abou...t anything, and just before he died, he said to his wife, Now listen, when I die I want you to take all my money and place it in the casket with me. I want t...
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Possum3
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0
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867
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Wedding night.
(Preview)
On the night of their honeymoon, a newlywed couple has an unfortunate accident, resulting in the amputation of the groom's left foot. Unable to control her grief, the bride calls her mother from the hospital. "Mother," she sobs, "my husband has only one foot." The mother, trying to console her daugh...
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Possum3
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0
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743
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At the Market
(Preview)
Well told in a British accent..........
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Bobdown
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0
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780
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OOPS!
(Preview)
A wealthy businessman is about to enter a meeting at work when he realizes that he forgot some important paperwork. He calls home so that his wife can retrieve them. The maid answers the phone and says that his wife is busy. He demands that the maid put his wife on the phone. The maid informs the man that hi...
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Possum3
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0
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641
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a friend
(Preview)
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Craig1
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2
|
692
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Woman's age.
(Preview)
A mother is driving her little girl to her friends house for a play day. Mummy, the little girl asks. How old are you? Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age, the mother replied. Its not polite. Okay, the little girl says. What colour was your hair two years ago? Now really, those are personal qu...
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Possum3
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1
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819
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Onions and Christmas Trees
(Preview)
Probably been listed here before if note... then...Onions and Christmas Trees A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there? The father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs: In her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and...
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JayDee
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0
|
680
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I know it's old - but still funny.
(Preview)
Bear Remover A man wakes up one morning in Alaska to find a bear on his roof. So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there's an ad for 'Bear Removers.' He calls the number, and the bear remover says he'll be over in 30 minutes. The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He's got a ladder, a bas...
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Possum3
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0
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627
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The Drover at the Pearly Gates
(Preview)
The Drover at the Pearly Gates A drover from a huge cattle station in the outback appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. "Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked. "Well, I can think of one thing," the drover offered. "Once, on a trip to the back blocks of Broken Hill out...
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JayDee
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0
|
691
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On Heat
(Preview)
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Bobdown
|
0
|
746
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a good nurse
(Preview)
YOU HAVE TO LOVE A GOOD NURSE A policeman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well, however,the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs in his crotch. Worried that it might be a second surgery and the doctors hadn'...
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Craig1
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0
|
548
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little johnny again
(Preview)
Subject: Little Johnny strikes yet again (1) Johnny's teacher is giving a lesson on Nutrition, and she decides to ask her students what they had for Breakfast.To add a Spelling Component, she asks the students to also spell their answers. Susan puts up her hand and says she had an Egg, 'E-G-G' 'Very g...
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Craig1
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0
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650
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Survey.
(Preview)
Last month a world-wide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:- "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge failure because of the following:... In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" m...
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Possum3
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0
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638
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WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
(Preview)
Some oldies and a few new ones, worth a read again.............. Men Are Just Happier People -- What do you expect from such simple creatures?Your last name stays put.The garage is all yours.Wedding plans take care of themselves.Chocolate is just another snack...You can never be pregnant.You c...
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Bobdown
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2
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706
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