A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Tennessee. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmers field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now Im going to retrieve it.

The old farmer replied, This is my property, and you are not coming over here.

The indignant lawyer said, I am one of the best trial attorneys in the United States and, if you dont let me get that duck, Ill sue you and take everything you own.

The old farmer smiled and said, Apparently, you dont know how we settle disputes in Tennessee. We settle small disagreements like this with the Three Kick Rule.'

The lawyer asked, What is the Three Kick Rule?

The Farmer replied, Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up.

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyers groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyers last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmers third kick to his rear end sent him
face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, Okay. Now its my turn.

The old farmer smiled and said, Naw, I give up. You can have the duck. 

Aussie Paul. 

 

-- Edited by aussie_paul on Friday 29th of September 2017 01:05:55 PM