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Classic....Hoo Roo

A man visited the local mental hospital and asked the head doctor how to determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalised. Its simple actually, said the doctor. We fill up a bathtub, then we offer the patient a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket. Then we simply ask him or her to empty the batht...

Brenda was in the fertilized egg business. She had several hundred young 'pullets' and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs. She kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced. This took a lot of time, so she bought some tiny bells and attached them to her roosters...

A strong young man at a construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone when it comes to pure strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workers on his team. After several minutes of ranting, the older worker had had enough and challenged the ****sure young worker. Why do...

A young Scottish lad and lass were sitting on a low stone wall, holding hands, gazing out over the loch. For several minutes they sat silently.Then the girl looked at the boy and said, "A penny for your thoughts, Angus.""Well, uh, I was thinkin.' Perhaps it's aboot time for a wee kiss.The girl blushed...

A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note saying, "I've had enough and left you, don't bother coming after me." She then hid under the bed to watch his reaction. After a short while the husband came home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he came...

There was a power failure in a Dublin Department Store last week and three hundred people were stranded on the escalators for more than two hours. OLeary, your glass is empty, will you be having another one? And what would I be doing with two empty glasses? OLeary replied. Young T...

An elderly Italian man lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, since the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament: Dear Vincent, I am feeli...

With family at The Entrance NSW . Walked the lake out to ocean . Walked back picking up two nappies, 15 plastic bags including chip bags . 6 batteries and heap of bottles . All with in 10m of rubbish bin . Top place . Why do people leave crap like this ? Should have fines similar to Singapore ! ATTITUDE !!

Nice! 'Even feral cats bury their waste': Filthy campers leave wrecked gear, excrement on South CoastBy Ben Smyth8 January 2019 9:52am Campers who left behind toilet seats, excrement in wombat holes and bag loads of rubbish at a "pristine" camping site have raised the ire of South Coast locals....

Planning on going on Thursday. Any water front sites in East Lakeside Drive?

SO YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW EVERYTHING? "Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right. (Bet you tried this out mentally, didn't you?) Maine is the only state in the USA whose name is just one syllable. (I'll bet you're going to check this out.) No word i...

Hi all my new ammeter/voltmeter arrived with no instructions. See pics please. A previous one (different wiring) burnt out. TESTING ON BENCH WITH 9V BATTERY ---- If I connect large red and small red to + battery,,, AND large black to - battery it shows,,, 000 volts and about 5.4A WITH NO SHUT CONNEC...

Hi all after 11 years the hard black "plastic" (a loose term as I think its a form of hard black plastic) wheel arch surround has started to fade and is in poor condition along the top from sun damage. Is there anyone with industry experience or a successful rejuvenation of the plastic. any help apprec...

https://www.caradvice.com.au/715275/the-dangerous-road-rule-that-could-kill-y...

Hi, We are having trouble with interference in the form of pixelization and sound breakup. I happens when I run the 12 V exhaust fans in the toilet or shower. I could put up with that but I have just recently bought a re-chargeable 8" fan and this also causes the problem whether its running of any power sou...

Four old guys are walking down a street. They turn a corner and see a sign that says:"OLD TIMERS BAR - ALL DRINKS 10 CENTS".They look at each other, and then go in, thinking this Is too good to be true.The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room "Come on in and let me pour one for you. What'l...

HOW THE INTERNET STARTED, ACCORDING TO THE BIBLE Please do not Google or check this with Snopes. They will lie to you. Trust me! In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy. And Dot Com was a comely woman, larg...

The new Major arrives at the desert camp to greet his troops, "So you better show me around Private Jones" "Well, there's the three tents we sleep and eat in and that's about it" he says. "What's that sad looking camel doing over there?" said the Major The Private looked a bit sheepish and said " We use him...