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New Stock Market Terms CEO-Chief Embezzlement Officer CFO- Corporate Fraud Officer BULL MARKET -A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius BEAR MARKET -a 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the ...

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman rushed down to...

OH DEAR ME... what next?...... Nude pics of Pauline and Bob Hawke on Rotto I guess.... Her vehement denial does notheing for her defence, the pics sure look like her....

G'Day Everyone , I wrote a new topic on the forum and as yet 1/ Cant find it and 2/ No ones bothered to reply , Iwas wondering if I missed something out, I call myself bobby06 and you probably no where to find all these blogs. My enquiry is about imfo from people who have recently travelled between Kuranda...

WHERE DO REDHEADED BABIES COME FROM? After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician. 'Doctor,' the man said, 'I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. Shecan't possibly be mine!!' 'Nonsense,' the doctor said.'Even though you an...

Where do I begin. Come the end of March, I'm on a 4 week holiday touring the Western Downs of Queensland. This is my introduction to the Grey Nomad life style of seeing this wounderful land we call our back yard. With a ute and trailer, I hope to see, breath and live the dream alot of you experience on a dail...

We tend to use caravan parks when on holidays and now that we are going for longer trips I don't know whether we should be booking ahead or just taking pot luck when we choose to stop. What do others do?

Walking into a bar Mike said to Charlie the bartender "pour me a stiff one" just had another fight with the little women. Oh year said Charlie how did this one end. Well when it was over she came to me on her hands and knees. "Really"said Charles now thats a change what did she have...

Two businessmen in Sydney were sitting down taking a break in there soon to be opened store, one said to the other "i bet any minute now some senior is going to walk by and put his face to the window and ask, " what are we going to be selling" Wasnt long before an oldie came along and asked t...

An old man goes into a chemist to get some viagra, "can i have 6 viagra cut in to quarters. I can cut them into quarters for u says Dan the pharmasist, but a quarter wont give u an erection. Im 96 says the old bloke, "i dont want an erection", i just want it sticking out a bit so i dont piddle in m...

Cleaning the Penguin today I found the roof to be marked/stained by bird or insect droppings also perhaps tree stains.I hate bleach, so good people what can I do.Cheers.Ibbo.

Myself and She Who Must Be Obeyed, (SWMBO) at 67 and 63 repectively plan on doing a 5 year lap of Australia starting in Jan 2010. Just wondering what tips anyone can give regarding what to look for (Damage etc) when, checking the underside of caravans for damage etc. Never had a caravan before so, as Shu...

Hello all this is my first posting in here. My query is about wireless broadband. At the moment we have wireless broadband with Telstra, I happened to be in an Optus shop yesterday and they told me that now Optus wireless broadband is as good as Telstra's. Does anyone have Optus broadband?? Would...

Maria had lost her husband almost...

The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees and sheexplained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine monthslater the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Johnny at the back of the class put his hand up and asks the teacher, are you sur...

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Stay with this - the answer is at the end, and put your glasses on. One evening a grandson was talking to his grandfather about current events. The grandson asked his grandfather what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general. The Grandfather replied, 'W...

Dave06, Looked at new a toy GPS and have looked at TomTom,Garmin. What i would like to know from others on this forum how good they are. I have read some reviews on GPS and of course they are all good. Are willing to pay good money for quality product there for i am aiming at middle to top range. ...

Hey guys I have so enjoyed chatting to you all. You are amazing. But now it has made me feel like I cannot wait 1 or 2 years to be free. Is there anyone out there that would like a travelling companion? I am clean and tidy, a Nurse, so I can work anywhere en route to pay my way, a writer too, not a bad cook at...

Not sure if I've posted this before but worth a read seeing the holidays are upon us and gas usage will start in earnest