Just Joking

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A man was driving down the road and ran out of gas. Just at that moment, a bee flew in his window. The bee said, 'What seems to be the problem?' 'I'm out of gas,' the man replied. The bee told the man to wait right there and flew away. Minutes later, the man watched as an entire swarm of bees flew to his car and in...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

THE STORK The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees and she explained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine months later the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Gemma at the back of the class put her hand up and asks theteacher, are you sure abou...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A petrol station owner in Dublin was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up.' Paddy pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex. Paddy guessed 8, and the p...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

Never Argue with a Woman One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to rea...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

The 1st Affair A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day they went to her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM. The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt. He put on his shoes and dr...

jimbo · jimbo

A man goes into a bookstore and asks the young lady assistant... "Do you have that new book out for men with short penises...... I can't remember the title?" She replies, "I'm not sure if it's in yet." The man said, "that's the one, I'll take a copy."

bill12 · bill12

Here,s something I saw in The Australian. The Canadian eco minister has a candle lit diner with wife to celebrate Earth day, and was rudely interupted when he caught the pet cat on fire........., then refused to use an electric fan to get rid of the smell(after dousing the cat ), caught the curtain...

miroku12g · miroku12g

Paddy say's "hey Mick" I'm thinking of getting a Labrador, Mick said, bugger that Paddy have you seen how many of their owners go blind !!!!! The grim reaper come for me last night ! I beat him of with a vacuum cleaner, talk about "Dyson" with death

Landfall · Landfall

Two mates walking their dogs on a nice sunny afternoon. After a while they come across a pub, one of the guys, says to his mate, "how about we go over and have a drink?" Is mate replies, "We can't go in the pub with the dogs." Watch, says his mate. He then pulls out his sunglasses and te...

jimbo · jimbo

During a recent flood in a small town, a young girl and a > boy were perched on top of their house. As they sat watching > articles float by in the water, they noticed an old hat go > past. > > Suddenly, the hat turned and came back, then turned around > and went downstream. After it had gon...

Cruising Granny · Cruising Granny

The Pastor's Ass The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again and it won again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT. The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the Pastor not to enter the d...

gerard gue · gerard gue

A Scotsman walks into the Bank of England in Threadneedle Street, CentralLondon and asks for the manager.He tells the manager that he is going to Australia on business for two weeksand needs to borrow £5,000.The manager tells him that the bank will need some form of security for theloan,so Hamish ha...

Zoomtopz · Zoomtopz

A young woman want bigger breasts . But she does not want surgery . A friend tells her she has to go to Africa , and see Dr Bumbuktu . Off she goes , no problems says th Doc . Just recite this Every day , your boobs Will get bigger . "Scoobie , doobie , doobie , I want bigger boobies" . She does her exer...

Kev-Maz · Kev-Maz

-- Old Timers Bar Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Maroochydore. They turned a corner and see a sign that says, 'Old Timer's Bar - all drinks 10 cents! They look at each other, and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room...

goinsoon · goinsoon

One day, a mum was cleaning her son's room and in the closet she found a bondage-S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She showed it to her husband. He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word. She finally asked him, "Well, what should we do about this?" The dad looke...

Firefly · Firefly

It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 6.6 pounds. The average man's penis is two times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. There are about one trillion bacteria o...

rockylizard · rockylizard

Talk about getting older. I found my first grey pubic hair yesterday, normally these things don't worry me, but it was in my Big Mac.

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

CHEWING GUM! An Australian man was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him. The Australian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, 'You Austr...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 120 km/h, sir.' The driver says, 'Christ, officer I had it on cruise control at 100, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.' Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car...

Blue Orchid · Blue Orchid

If a man is alone in the dim dark jungle and talks to himself to ward off boredom... is he still wrong???

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	BP; (Preview) A man was driving down the road and ran out of gas. Just at that moment, a bee flew in his window. The bee said, 'What seems to be the problem?' 'I'm out of gas,' the man replied. The bee told the man to wait right there and flew away. Minutes later, the man watched as an entire swarm of bees flew to his car and in...	justcruisin01	0	978	04:56 AM Apr 3, 2012 by justcruisin01
	THE STORK' (Preview) *THE STORK* The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees and she explained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine months later the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Gemma at the back of the class put her hand up and asks theteacher, are you sure abou...	justcruisin01	0	1019	04:48 AM Apr 3, 2012 by justcruisin01
	IRISH SERVO; (Preview) A petrol station owner in Dublin was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up.' Paddy pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex. Paddy guessed 8, and the p...	justcruisin01	0	832	04:46 AM Apr 3, 2012 by justcruisin01
	NEVER ARGUE WITH A WOMAN; (Preview) Never Argue with a Woman One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to rea...	justcruisin01	0	999	04:45 AM Apr 3, 2012 by justcruisin01
	SIX AFFAIRS; (Preview) The 1st Affair A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day they went to her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM. The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt. He put on his shoes and dr...	justcruisin01	2	1045	03:53 AM Mar 30, 2012 by Travel Bug
	Shorty (Preview) A man goes into a bookstore and asks the young lady assistant... "Do you have that new book out for men with short penises...... I can't remember the title?" She replies, "I'm not sure if it's in yet." The man said, "that's the one, I'll take a copy."	jimbo	0	682	02:45 AM Mar 28, 2012 by jimbo
	Earth Day. (Preview) Here,s something I saw in The Australian. The Canadian eco minister has a candle lit diner with wife to celebrate Earth day, and was rudely interupted when he caught the pet cat on fire........., then refused to use an electric fan to get rid of the smell(after dousing the cat ), caught the curtain...	bill12	0	758	03:36 PM Mar 27, 2012 by bill12
	Guide Dogs (Preview) Paddy say's "hey Mick" I'm thinking of getting a Labrador, Mick said, bugger that Paddy have you seen how many of their owners go blind !!!!! The grim reaper come for me last night ! I beat him of with a vacuum cleaner, talk about "Dyson" with death	miroku12g	0	786	01:56 AM Mar 23, 2012 by miroku12g
	Blind faith. (Preview) Two mates walking their dogs on a nice sunny afternoon. After a while they come across a pub, one of the guys, says to his mate, "how about we go over and have a drink?" Is mate replies, "We can't go in the pub with the dogs." Watch, says his mate. He then pulls out his sunglasses and te...	Landfall	0	853	03:00 AM Mar 22, 2012 by Landfall
	My Dad! (Preview) During a recent flood in a small town, a young girl and a > boy were perched on top of their house. As they sat watching > articles float by in the water, they noticed an old hat go > past. > > Suddenly, the hat turned and came back, then turned around > and went downstream. After it had gon...	jimbo	0	951	05:41 PM Mar 18, 2012 by jimbo
	The "Bottom" Line (Preview) The Pastor's Ass The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again and it won again. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT. The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the Pastor not to enter the d...	Cruising Granny	0	933	03:44 AM Mar 17, 2012 by Cruising Granny
	Bank Loan to a Scottish millionaire (Preview) A Scotsman walks into the Bank of England in Threadneedle Street, CentralLondon and asks for the manager.He tells the manager that he is going to Australia on business for two weeksand needs to borrow £5,000.The manager tells him that the bank will need some form of security for theloan,so Hamish ha...	gerard gue	1	961	08:47 PM Mar 16, 2012 by jimbo
	Dr Bumbuktu (Preview) A young woman want bigger breasts . But she does not want surgery . A friend tells her she has to go to Africa , and see Dr Bumbuktu . Off she goes , no problems says th Doc . Just recite this Every day , your boobs Will get bigger . "Scoobie , doobie , doobie , I want bigger boobies" . She does her exer...	Zoomtopz	1	894	08:45 PM Mar 16, 2012 by jimbo
	Old Timers Bar (Preview) -- Old Timers Bar Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Maroochydore. They turned a corner and see a sign that says, 'Old Timer's Bar - all drinks 10 cents! They look at each other, and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true. The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room...	Kev-Maz	0	779	03:30 AM Mar 14, 2012 by Kev-Maz
	S&M (Preview) One day, a mum was cleaning her son's room and in the closet she found a bondage-S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She showed it to her husband. He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word. She finally asked him, "Well, what should we do about this?" The dad looke...	goinsoon	0	822	04:32 AM Mar 12, 2012 by goinsoon
	The Human Body (Preview) It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 6.6 pounds. The average man's penis is two times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. There are about one trillion bacteria o...	Firefly	4	939	05:11 AM Mar 11, 2012 by rowdy
	Getting Older.... (Preview) Talk about getting older. I found my first grey pubic hair yesterday, normally these things don't worry me, but it was in my Big Mac.	rockylizard	2	973	06:22 PM Mar 10, 2012 by rockylizard
	CHEWING GUM; (Preview) CHEWING GUM! An Australian man was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him. The Australian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, 'You Austr...	justcruisin01	0	811	04:15 AM Mar 10, 2012 by justcruisin01
	BEING NICKED; (Preview) A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 120 km/h, sir.' The driver says, 'Christ, officer I had it on cruise control at 100, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.' Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car...	justcruisin01	0	729	04:14 AM Mar 10, 2012 by justcruisin01
	I wonder (Preview) If a man is alone in the dim dark jungle and talks to himself to ward off boredom... is he still wrong???	Blue Orchid	3	997	06:25 PM Mar 9, 2012 by rosco
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