Just Joking

sarg · sarg

One day an Irishman goes into a pharmacy - reaches into his pocket and takes out a small Irishwhiskeybottle and a teaspoon He pours from the bottle onto the teaspoon and offers it to the chemist. "Could you taste this for me, please?" The chemist takes the teaspoon, puts it in his mouth, swil...

Hurls · Hurls

You cant beat an Army band.a crowd stopper anywhere, any time http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a7e_1381073342

sarg · sarg

A teacher noticed that little Johnny at the back of the classwas squirming around, scratching his crotch,and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on.He was quite embarrassed and whisperedthat he had just recently been circumcisedand he was quite itchy. The teacher to...

copper1 · copper1

OH No !!! He has a sister ???????????? Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his willy today in the playground!" Before her mother could raise a concern,Sally said, "It reminded me of a peanut.." Relaxing wi...

Gunsondeck · Gunsondeck

Newspaper article... G.

copper1 · copper1

Bruce took his missus Sheila to the Royal Sydney Show and one of the first exhibits they stopped at was the breeding bulls. They went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, "This bull mated 50 times last year." Sheila playfully nudged Bruce in the ribs and said, "H...

copper1 · copper1

In parochial school students are taught that lying is a sin. However, Instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination was OK to express The Truth differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those Teachings: Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs. An attractive young woman on a fl...

copper1 · copper1

The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, "Who owns the big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gunbelt and said "I do. Why?" The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger a...

copper1 · copper1

There was a typical blond. She had long, blonde hair, blue eyes, and she was sick of all the blonde jokes. One day she decided to get makeover. She cut and dyed her hair brunette and went driving down a country road, searching for someone who would appreciate her for her intelligence. When she came acros...

copper1 · copper1

On their honeymoon, the new husband told his bride, "I have a confession to make that I should have made before, but I was concerned that it might affect our relationship. "What is it?" his new bride asked lovingly. "I'm a golf fanatic," he said. "I think about golf co...

copper1 · copper1

Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are excited about their decision to get married ... They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a Chemist ...... Jacob suggests they go in. Jacob addresses the man behind the counter: "Are you the owner?" The pharmacist answers &quo...

copper1 · copper1

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a bus seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest a...

copper1 · copper1

A blonde goes to a restaurant, buys a coffee and sits down to drink it. She looks on the side of her cup and finds a peel off prize. She pulls off the tab and yells, 'I WON! I WON! I WON a motor home, I WON a motor home!' The waitress runs over and says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize given away was a...

Hurls · Hurls

Here's another trick of Doctor Dementia to test your skills.... I've seen this with the letters out of order, but this is the first time I've seen it with numbers. Good example of a Brain Study: If you can read this OUT LOUD, you have a strong mind. And better than that: Alzheimer's is a long, lon...

copper1 · copper1

Angela Merkel the German PM arrives at Passport Control at Paris Charles De Gaulle airport. "Nationality?" asks the immigration officer. "German," she replies. ... "Occupation?" "No; just here for a few days." Hope she had her mobile phone as well...

copper1 · copper1

Little Johnnys Dad buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it out at dinner on the first night. Dad asks Little Johnny what he did that afternoon.... Johnny says, "I did some schoolwork." The robot slaps Johnny. Johnny says, "Okay, okay. I was at a f...

jules47 · jules47

A nun gets into a cab, and the cab driver won't stop staring at her. Finally, the cabbie says, "I have a question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you." "My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything."... "...

sarg · sarg

I hope that you get this one ok Gary Mick and Paddy had promised their Uncle Seamus, who had been a seafaring gent all his life,to bury him at sea when he died. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the boys kept their promise. They set off with Uncle Seamus all stitched up in a burial bag and loaded on...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

For those who haven't heard, Washington State just passed two new laws - gay marriage and legalised marijuana. The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalised on the same day makes perfect biblical sense because Leviticus 20:13 says "If a man lies with another man they should be stoned...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

Just imagine... If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Air New Zealand one year ago, you would have $49.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in the AA one year ago, you would have $33.00 today.If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Canterbury Finance one year ago,you would have $0.00 to...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Irish Sugar Test (Preview) One day an Irishman goes into a pharmacy - reaches into his pocket and takes out a small Irishwhiskeybottle and a teaspoon He pours from the bottle onto the teaspoon and offers it to the chemist. "Could you taste this for me, please?" The chemist takes the teaspoon, puts it in his mouth, swil...	sarg	1	749	03:33 AM Nov 3, 2013 by copper1
	Colonel Bogey (Preview) You cant beat an Army band.a crowd stopper anywhere, any time http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a7e_1381073342	Hurls	1	742	04:54 PM Nov 2, 2013 by Ontos45
	Little Johnny (Preview) A teacher noticed that little Johnny at the back of the classwas squirming around, scratching his crotch,and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on.He was quite embarrassed and whisperedthat he had just recently been circumcisedand he was quite itchy. The teacher to...	sarg	0	753	03:40 AM Nov 2, 2013 by sarg
	Little Johnny's Sister (Preview) OH No !!! He has a sister ???????????? Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his willy today in the playground!" Before her mother could raise a concern,Sally said, "It reminded me of a peanut.." Relaxing wi...	copper1	1	778	06:28 AM Oct 31, 2013 by tonyd
	Only in Scotland... (Preview) Newspaper article... G.	Gunsondeck	0	662	07:34 PM Oct 30, 2013 by Gunsondeck
	The Royal Show (Preview) Bruce took his missus Sheila to the Royal Sydney Show and one of the first exhibits they stopped at was the breeding bulls. They went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, "This bull mated 50 times last year." Sheila playfully nudged Bruce in the ribs and said, "H...	copper1	0	506	06:49 PM Oct 30, 2013 by copper1
	A Catholic Hairdryer (Preview) In parochial school students are taught that lying is a sin. However, Instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination was OK to express The Truth differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those Teachings: Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs. An attractive young woman on a fl...	copper1	1	711	11:17 PM Oct 30, 2013 by mongrel
	The Lone Ranger (Preview) The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, "Who owns the big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gunbelt and said "I do. Why?" The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger a...	copper1	2	590	06:27 PM Oct 30, 2013 by mongrel
	Blonde Sheep Counter (Preview) There was a typical blond. She had long, blonde hair, blue eyes, and she was sick of all the blonde jokes. One day she decided to get makeover. She cut and dyed her hair brunette and went driving down a country road, searching for someone who would appreciate her for her intelligence. When she came acros...	copper1	1	733	05:48 PM Oct 30, 2013 by Ontos45
	Golf Addict (Preview) On their honeymoon, the new husband told his bride, "I have a confession to make that I should have made before, but I was concerned that it might affect our relationship. "What is it?" his new bride asked lovingly. "I'm a golf fanatic," he said. "I think about golf co...	copper1	0	577	05:10 AM Oct 30, 2013 by copper1
	Lateral Thinking (Preview) Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are excited about their decision to get married ... They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a Chemist ...... Jacob suggests they go in. Jacob addresses the man behind the counter: "Are you the owner?" The pharmacist answers &quo...	copper1	0	581	04:50 AM Oct 30, 2013 by copper1
	Arthritis (Preview) A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a bus seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest a...	copper1	0	588	10:30 PM Oct 29, 2013 by copper1
	I Won a Motor Home (Preview) A blonde goes to a restaurant, buys a coffee and sits down to drink it. She looks on the side of her cup and finds a peel off prize. She pulls off the tab and yells, 'I WON! I WON! I WON a motor home, I WON a motor home!' The waitress runs over and says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize given away was a...	copper1	1	763	11:48 PM Oct 29, 2013 by Keith19837
	Jumbled Words (Preview) Here's another trick of Doctor Dementia to test your skills.... I've seen this with the letters out of order, but this is the first time I've seen it with numbers. Good example of a Brain Study: If you can read this OUT LOUD, you have a strong mind. And better than that: Alzheimer's is a long, lon...	Hurls	4	1036	08:20 PM Oct 29, 2013 by Mike C
	German PM (Preview) Angela Merkel the German PM arrives at Passport Control at Paris Charles De Gaulle airport. "Nationality?" asks the immigration officer. "German," she replies. ... "Occupation?" "No; just here for a few days." Hope she had her mobile phone as well...	copper1	3	810	05:51 PM Oct 29, 2013 by 2weis
	Little Johnny (Preview) Little Johnnys Dad buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it out at dinner on the first night. Dad asks Little Johnny what he did that afternoon.... Johnny says, "I did some schoolwork." The robot slaps Johnny. Johnny says, "Okay, okay. I was at a f...	copper1	2	775	05:06 PM Oct 29, 2013 by Wombat 280
	The Cab Driver (Preview) A nun gets into a cab, and the cab driver won't stop staring at her. Finally, the cabbie says, "I have a question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you." "My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything."... "...	jules47	1	663	04:37 PM Oct 29, 2013 by GaryKelly
	Irish Burial at Sea‏ (Preview) I hope that you get this one ok Gary Mick and Paddy had promised their Uncle Seamus, who had been a seafaring gent all his life,to bury him at sea when he died. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the boys kept their promise. They set off with Uncle Seamus all stitched up in a burial bag and loaded on...	sarg	2	698	04:34 PM Oct 29, 2013 by GaryKelly
	Only in U.S.. (Preview) For those who haven't heard, Washington State just passed two new laws - gay marriage and legalised marijuana. The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalised on the same day makes perfect biblical sense because Leviticus 20:13 says "If a man lies with another man they should be stoned...	Aus-Kiwi	0	463	06:58 AM Oct 29, 2013 by Aus-Kiwi
	Financial advise the kiwi way (Preview) Just imagine... If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Air New Zealand one year ago, you would have $49.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in the AA one year ago, you would have $33.00 today.If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Canterbury Finance one year ago,you would have $0.00 to...	Aus-Kiwi	0	585	06:53 AM Oct 29, 2013 by Aus-Kiwi
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