Just Joking

Woody2 · Woody2

Once upon a time ... The king called on the royal weather forecaster and inquired as to the weather forecast for the next few hours. The royal weatherman assured him that there was no chance of rain for at least 4 days. So the king went fishing with his wife, the queen. On the way he met a farmer on his donkey...

Woody2 · Woody2

Correct English Definition I phoned a long standing friend and asked what he was doing. He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment". (I was impressed......) On further enquiring I learnt that he was washing the dis...

Goldfinger · Goldfinger

Hoo Roo.

Possum3 · Possum3

A teacher asks the class to name things that ends with Tor and that eats things First boy: Alligator Teacher: Very Good that's a big word... Second boy : Predator Teacher: Yes, That's another big word.Well done Little Johnny: Vibrator. After nearly falling off her chair Teacher: That is a big word,bu...

Yarra · Yarra

My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds ... only 15 to go.1. Ate salad for dinner ... mostly croutons & tomatoes ... really just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce ... and cheese... FINE, it was a pizza ... I ate a pizza!2. How to prepare Tofu:First throw it in the trash and then grill s...

Yarra · Yarra

Everything Hurts, And What Doesn't Hurt, Doesn't Work.Your Little Black Book Contains Names Only Ending In M.D.You Get Winded Playing Chess.You Join A Health Club And Don't Go.You Still Chase The Opposite Sex But Don't Know Why.You Look Forward To Dull Evenings.You Turn Out The Lights For Economi...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Possum3 · Possum3

"Bless me father-- for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman." The priest asks, "Is that you, little Tommy Shaughnessy?" "Yes, Father, it is. "And, who was the woman you were with?" "Sure and I can't be tellin' you Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."... "Well, Tommy, I'm sure to find out...

Ron-D · Ron-D

oops mistake sorry Link did not work... -- Edited by Ron-D on Monday 30th of January 2017 11:11:50 AM -- Edited by Ron-D on Monday 30th of January 2017 11:17:18 AM

Possum3 · Possum3

Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says:... "Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk." "Is, Luis, eet sure smell like bacon." With rene...

Yarra · Yarra

He opens it to find two sheriffs deputies there. He asks if there is a problem.One of the deputies asks if he is married. The man replies, Yes, I am.The deputy then asks if he could see a picture of the mans wife.The guy says, Sure and gets a photo to show them.The deputy says, Im sorry, sir. But it looks like...

Yarra · Yarra

A salesman checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before his meeting tomorrow, he called down to the desk clerk to ask if there was a barber on the premises. "I'm afraid not, sir," the clerk told him apologetically,"but down the hall from your room is a vending machine that sh...

oldbloke · oldbloke

Three friends married women from different parts of the world.The first man married a Greek girl. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning.It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.The second man married a Thai girl. H...

Goldfinger · Goldfinger

This is Clara...she has been appointed by our Prime Minister to ""negotiate"" all Trade Deals with President Trump... You know,..... I think this is actually 'GOING TO WORK'....!...Hoo Roo

Possum3 · Possum3

A married couple were on holiday in Jamaica . They were touring around the market-place looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop. From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say, 'You foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop..' So the married couple wa...

Possum3 · Possum3

A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks for?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move."... "...

Craig1 · Craig1

as attached

Goldfinger · Goldfinger

Traffic Cop, entrapment.......her case would surely 'hold up' in Court....Hoo Roo

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Weather forecaster (Preview) Once upon a time ... The king called on the royal weather forecaster and inquired as to the weather forecast for the next few hours. The royal weatherman assured him that there was no chance of rain for at least 4 days. So the king went fishing with his wife, the queen. On the way he met a farmer on his donkey...	Woody2	1	979	06:04 PM Feb 6, 2017 by Felicia
	Correct English Definition (Preview) *Correct English Definition* *I phoned a long standing friend and asked what he was doing. He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment".* (I was impressed......) *On further enquiring I learnt that he was washing the dis...*	Woody2	0	1030	04:54 PM Feb 6, 2017 by Woody2
	Gettin' Older......... (Preview) Hoo Roo.	Goldfinger	0	946	03:22 PM Feb 5, 2017 by Goldfinger
	Little Johnny (Preview) A teacher asks the class to name things that ends with Tor and that eats things First boy: Alligator Teacher: Very Good that's a big word... Second boy : Predator Teacher: Yes, That's another big word.Well done Little Johnny: Vibrator. After nearly falling off her chair Teacher: That is a big word,bu...	Possum3	0	923	11:07 AM Feb 5, 2017 by Possum3
	Something about Senior Moments.... I think? But I Can't Remember (Preview) My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds ... only 15 to go.1. Ate salad for dinner ... mostly croutons & tomatoes ... really just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce ... and cheese... FINE, it was a pizza ... I ate a pizza!2. How to prepare Tofu:First throw it in the trash and then grill s...	Yarra	0	997	10:10 AM Feb 3, 2017 by Yarra
	How do you know when you're growing old (Preview) Everything Hurts, And What Doesn't Hurt, Doesn't Work.Your Little Black Book Contains Names Only Ending In M.D.You Get Winded Playing Chess.You Join A Health Club And Don't Go.You Still Chase The Opposite Sex But Don't Know Why.You Look Forward To Dull Evenings.You Turn Out The Lights For Economi...	Yarra	0	875	09:59 AM Feb 3, 2017 by Yarra
	Safe sex (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	975	07:12 PM Feb 2, 2017 by Woody n Sue
	Grandma's memory (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	837	07:11 PM Feb 2, 2017 by Woody n Sue
	Man gets beaten up in elevator (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	1238	07:09 PM Feb 2, 2017 by Woody n Sue
	Bless me Father...... (Preview) "Bless me father-- for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman." The priest asks, "Is that you, little Tommy Shaughnessy?" "Yes, Father, it is. "And, who was the woman you were with?" "Sure and I can't be tellin' you Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."... "Well, Tommy, I'm sure to find out...	Possum3	0	920	10:22 PM Feb 1, 2017 by Possum3
	Trying to argue with the misses (Preview) oops mistake sorry Link did not work... -- Edited by Ron-D on Monday 30th of January 2017 11:11:50 AM -- Edited by Ron-D on Monday 30th of January 2017 11:17:18 AM	Ron-D	6	1572	08:44 AM Jan 31, 2017 by Goldfinger
	The Bacon Tree (Preview) Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says:... "Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk." "Is, Luis, eet sure smell like bacon." With rene...	Possum3	3	1165	07:09 PM Jan 30, 2017 by Woody n Sue
	A man is sitting at home alone when he hears a knock at the door (Preview) He opens it to find two sheriffs deputies there. He asks if there is a problem.One of the deputies asks if he is married. The man replies, Yes, I am.The deputy then asks if he could see a picture of the mans wife.The guy says, Sure and gets a photo to show them.The deputy says, Im sorry, sir. But it looks like...	Yarra	1	972	12:29 PM Jan 30, 2017 by Blues Man
	The hair cut (Preview) A salesman checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before his meeting tomorrow, he called down to the desk clerk to ask if there was a barber on the premises. "I'm afraid not, sir," the clerk told him apologetically,"but down the hall from your room is a vending machine that sh...	Yarra	1	1050	12:27 PM Jan 30, 2017 by Blues Man
	New Wife (Preview) Three friends married women from different parts of the world.The first man married a Greek girl. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning.It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.The second man married a Thai girl. H...	oldbloke	1	1351	12:13 PM Jan 30, 2017 by Blues Man
	Meet Clara..Australia's new Trade negotiator to the United States of Amerhicaaa... (Preview) This is Clara...she has been appointed by our Prime Minister to ""negotiate"" all Trade Deals with President Trump... You know,..... I think this is actually 'GOING TO WORK'....!...Hoo Roo	Goldfinger	0	1068	12:21 PM Jan 29, 2017 by Goldfinger
	Magic Sandals (Preview) A married couple were on holiday in Jamaica . They were touring around the market-place looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop. From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say, 'You foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop..' So the married couple wa...	Possum3	0	950	09:52 AM Jan 29, 2017 by Possum3
	THE CLOCK! (Preview) A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks for?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move."... "...	Possum3	1	1074	08:55 AM Jan 29, 2017 by Goldfinger
	g gays (Preview) as attached	Craig1	0	948	08:54 PM Jan 28, 2017 by Craig1
	Weel, this made me laugh...a tad off colour.... (Preview) Traffic Cop, entrapment.......her case would surely 'hold up' in Court....Hoo Roo	Goldfinger	0	866	07:50 PM Jan 28, 2017 by Goldfinger
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