Joyce and Frank had had enough, they were calling it a day.

The happy hour had been and gone, it was time to hit the hay.

Frank was in his undies as he curled up in the bed

Joyce said she would shower first,then find a magazine she hadn't read

They loved this caravanning life,the great wide open spaces

They'd seen so much of this big land,they'd been so many places.

And now that it was evening and time to take a rest

Frank was smiling at the roof....they were so truly blessed.

Suddenly a gust of wind , in the middle of Frank's yawning.

It was something like a whirly wind and it really shook the awning

'Joyce I'm popping just outside ,to make sure the ropes are tight'

'You get on with your shower love ,I'm sure that I'll be right.'

But the sight that greeted Frank outside was an awning at an angle

And the ropes that should secure it were just a messy tangle

'Love I'm gonna need a hand, the awnings gonna tear

I need your help to hold it, hurry ...bring a chair'

'But Frank I'm in the shower.!'...'well dear just grab a towel'

'I cant hold on here much longer, I need your help right now.'

So Joyce she wrapped a towel around, and stepped outside the van

Frank said 'grab that awning rail and hold it if you can.'

They wrestled with that awning ...though there now was wind and rain

It took them fifteen minutes but they got it fixed again.

What a sight the two of them , half naked in the storm

They needed to secure one rope then get into the warm

Comfort was within their reach...the awning now secure

Then a gust of wind from nowhere, slammed the flamin' door.

As much as Frank would wrench and pull

That door was stuck closed tight.

And he and Joyce both barely clothed

We're stuck out in the night.

Theres only one thing for it love,there's one window with a gap

Im gonna have to bunk you up and push you in through that

Now Joyce she is a sturdy girl...it was gonna be a task

Cos Frank has nothing much for muscles and a boney little arse.

Joyce climbed into the window, Frank gave a mighty shove

'Is everything alright my dear? Are you ok my love?'

'Im not ok, im stuck halfway. Frank get me out and soon!'

Her boobs were in the kitchen sink,her butt looked at the moon.

Their private little drama, was no longer so

Lights came on all round the park,and everyone would know

Someone called the fire brigade ,the cops would not be long.

This had the look to everyone of a robbery gone wrong.

Frank ,he was a desperate man, in his Y front glory

And poor old Joyce was window bound,it was an awful story.

It wasn't meant to be this way, so much had gone awry

Frank looked towards the heavens...and sadly wondered why.

A lady from the van next door had soon produced a sheet

And placed it with dexterity,Joyce's modesty to keep

The police and fire brigade arrived with floodlights, ropes and ladders

And the local news reporter came...complete with crew and cameras.

Then the fire chief decided that they couldn't get her free

They'd have to take her downtown to a local factory

they'd have to cut the caravan, make the window large.

The firemen stepped aside and left the coppers there in charge.

They hooked the caravan up to a yellow four wheel drive

And made poor Joyce more comfortable , so she'd endure the ride.

Four police cars sirens blaring were the escorts on the way

While choppers overhead relayed newsbreaks play by play.

The convoy was impressive as it wheeled on through the town

Joyces feet were sticking out ,wrapped in her dressing gown

They pulled into the factory and found the right machine

And Joyce was free at last from this most horrific dream.

The reporter formed his headline for the paper the next day.

'Naked woman trapped in window, butt it ended up ok '

It was the leading story on breakfast timeTV,

It was about as famous as those two woukd ever be.

Joyce and Frank still caravan, they still go from park to park

But it's very very seldom that they step out after dark.

They have some notoriety, 15 minutes of great fame

But both say they'd be happy to be anonymous again.