Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels

My Dad told me to invest my money in bonds. So I bought 100 copies of Goldfinger

People who use selfie sticks really need to have a good, long look at themselves

After the helicopter crash, the blonde pilot was asked what happened. She replied, "It was getting chilly in there, so I turned the fan off."

A dad is washing the car with his son. After a moment, the son asks his father, "Do you think we could use a sponge instead?"

I used to wonder why Frisbees looked bigger the closer it came... Then it hit me!

Accidentally pooped my pants in the elevator. I'm taking this sh%t to a whole new level.

16 Blondes are standing outside the bar. Why didn't they go in? The sign said 18+.