I cleaned this one up just for the Forum.....I can be couth!

The Italian fellow said: "Lasta night I massaged my beautiful wife all over her body with the finest olive oils....then we made mad passionate love

and I made her scream non-stop for five minutes.....

The Frenchman said: "Ahhhh oui....I hand and finger massaged mon petit angelic wife all over her body with special aphrodisiac oils....then we made harmonious luuv,

and I made her scream for fifteen minutes straight...

The Aussie bloke said: "Crikey, that's nothing!!....last night I massaged my Gwendoline all over her body with ultra soft spreadable genuine Australian butter....I caressed her entire

body right down to her toes and up to the  nape of her neck...and then we made love.....and I made her scream for two longgg hours....

The Italian and the Frenchie, astonished, asked, "Two Hours?.. Voila! Sacre Bleu !! Phenomenal!!!

"Tell us, how did you do it to make her scream for two hours?".....

"Struth!...Gwendoline didn't half go off, when I wiped me hands on her lounge-room curtains".......

Hoo Roo