Saint Peter is seeing all the new arrivals trying to go through the Pearly Gates.......
The first applicant of the day explains that his last day was not a good one.
'I came home early and found my wife laying naked in bed. She claimed that she had just gotten out of the shower. Well, her hair was dry and I checked the shower and it was completely dry too. I knew she was into some hanky-panky and I began to look for her lover. I went onto the balcony of our 9th floor apartment and found the SOB clinging to the rail by his fingertips. I was so angry that I began bashing his fingertips with a flower pot and he let go and fell, but his fall was broken by some awnings and bushes. On seeing he was still alive I found super human strength to drag our antique chest to the balcony and throw it over. It hit the man and killed him. At this point the stress got to me I suffered a massive heart attack and died.'
Saint Peter thanked him and sent him on to the waiting room.
The second applicant said his last day was his worst.
I was on the roof of an apartment building working on the AC equipment. I stumbled over my tools and toppled off the building. I managed to grab on to the balcony rail of a 9th floor apartment when some idiot came rushing out and bashed my hands with a flower pot. I fell but hit some awnings and bushes and survived, but as I looked up, I saw a huge chest falling toward me. I tried to crawl out of the way, but failed, and was hit and killed by the chest.'
Saint Peter could not help but chuckle as he directs the man to the waiting room.
Saint Peter was still chuckling as the third customer of the day enters, so he apologized to him and said to him .......
'I doubt that your day was as interesting as the two fellows that arrived here before you.'
'I don't know' replies the man 'picture this, I'm buck naked hiding in this cedar chest...........................'
