MAORI CONVENTION. 33,000 Maori meet at the Westpac Stadium for a Maori Are Not Stupid convention. Pita Sharples addresses the crowd.. We are all here today to prove to the world that Maori are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer please? Hone Harawira gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. Pita asks him What is 15 plus 15? After 15 or 20 seconds Hone says, Forty! Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then the Maori start chanting Give him another chance! Give him another chance! Pita says, Well since we have a huge crowd, world-wide press and global broadcast media here, I think we can give him another chance. So he asks, What is 5 plus 5? After nearly 30 seconds he eventually says, Twelve? Pita looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh. Everyone is disheartened and Hone looks like hes going to weep. But then the 33,000 Maori begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, Give him another chance! Give him another chance! Pita, unsure whether he is now doing more harm than good eventually says, OK then, what is 2 plus 2? Silence hangs over the stadium. Hone closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, Four? Pandemonium breaks out throughout the stadium as the Maori crowd stand to a man, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream, Give him another chance! Give him another chance!
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AUSSIE CONVENTION. 33,000 Aussies meet at the MCG for an Aussie Are Not Stupid convention. Lisa Wilkinson addresses the crowd, "We are all here today to prove to the world that Aussie's are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer please?". Jimmy Johnson gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. Lisa asks him "What is 15 plus 15?" After 15 or 20 seconds Jimmy says, "Forty!" Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then the Aussies start chanting, "Give him another chance! Give him another chance!" Lisa says, "Well since we have a huge crowd, world-wide press and global broadcast media here, I think we can give him another chance". So she asks, "What is 5 plus 5?" After nearly 30 seconds he eventually says, "Twelve?" Lisa looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh. Everyone is disheartened and Jimmy looks like he's going to weep. But then the 33,000 Aussies begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, "Give him another chance! Give him another chance!" Lisa, unsure whether he is now doing more harm than good eventually says, "OK then, what is 2 plus 2?" Silence hangs over the stadium. Jimmy closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, "Four?" Pandemonium breaks out throughout the stadium as the Aussie crowd stand to a man, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream, "Give him another chance! Give him another chance!"
The integration of the Pakeha and Maori is something New Zealand can be proud of. Even though I have left the country 40 years ago, I still find you so called joke "Offensive".
HMMMMMM ... fully understand (and half-expected) the response to the Maori funny.
SOOOO .... let's take it to the ultimate end - no more Irish jokes, no more blonde jokes, no more lawyer jokes, no more muslim jokes, no more indigenous Strayan jokes, no more mother-in-law jokes, no more men are dumb/thoughtless jokes ..........................................................
If it is posted in the joke section, I would suggest that unless it is actually blatantly offensive, then it is there for its humour value.
Each of us was provided with a 'funny' bone - and although sometimes if it gets bumped it makes one wince - but at least we do have a funny bone.
Cheers - life was not meant to be too serious - John
-- Edited by rockylizard on Friday 16th of October 2015 09:34:07 AM
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2006 Discovery 3 TDV6 SE Auto - 2008 23ft Golden Eagle Hunter Some people feel the rain - the others just get wet - Bob Dylan
Gunsondeck. there's a big difference in a Kiwi jokes being about Kiwis, or Irish or Australian. In this case you have singled out a group of people, why don't you change the wording to Australian Aboriginals, or Torrens Straight islanders, haven't got it in you, have you!
Gunsondeck. there's a big difference in a Kiwi jokes being about Kiwis, or Irish or Australian. In this case you have singled out a group of people, why don't you change the wording to Australian Aboriginals, or Torrens Straight islanders, haven't got it in you, have you!
Gday...
Ian .... MAAAAATE
Guess ya missed me comment a little while ago ...
cheers - John
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2006 Discovery 3 TDV6 SE Auto - 2008 23ft Golden Eagle Hunter Some people feel the rain - the others just get wet - Bob Dylan
HMMMMMM ... fully understand (and half-expected) the response to the Maori funny.
SOOOO .... let's take it to the ultimate end - no more Irish jokes, no more blonde jokes, no more lawyer jokes, no more muslim jokes, no more indigenous Strayan jokes, no more mother-in-law jokes, no more men are dumb/thoughtless jokes ..........................................................
If it is posted in the joke section, I would suggest that unless it is actually blatantly offensive, then it is there for its humour value.
Each of us was provided with a 'funny' bone - and although sometimes if it gets bumped it makes one wince - but at least we do have a funny bone.
Cheers - life was not meant to be too serious - John
Gday...
Ian ..... MAAAATE
Read it agen mate ... if you find Maori jokes so offensive then you need to be consistent .............
You should vent your chagrin to 99% of the funnies that are shared in a wide variety of media.
Be consistent is all I suggest ... therefore go back through the jokes posted on our forum and highlight the insensitivity of each one.
You will find, if you care to waste your time looking back over ANY humourous item I have posted, in ANY sub-forum, I do NOT ever post funnies that are derogatory.
Perhaps, if insensitive funnies pique your moral position, it is like the on/off switch on the telly - use it and don't bother reading in Just Joking.
Cheers - and sorry you are so vexed - John
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2006 Discovery 3 TDV6 SE Auto - 2008 23ft Golden Eagle Hunter Some people feel the rain - the others just get wet - Bob Dylan
Guys I think we are getting a little precious here so is this better
People CONVENTION. 33,000 poeple meet at the Westpac Stadium for a People Are Not Stupid convention. a person addresses the crowd.. We are all here today to prove to the world that People are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer please? a person gingerly works there way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. A person asks this person What is 15 plus 15? After 15 or 20 seconds A person says, Forty! Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then the Peopls start chanting Give the person another chance! Give person another chance! A person says, Well since we have a huge crowd, world-wide press and global broadcast media here, I think we can give the person another chance. So the person asks, What is 5 plus 5? After nearly 30 seconds a person eventually says, Twelve? A person looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh. Everyone is disheartened and A person looks like a person is going to weep. But then the 33,000 People begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, Give the person another chance! Give the person another chance! A person , unsure whether a person is now doing more harm than good eventually says, OK then, what is 2 plus 2? Silence hangs over the stadium. A person closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, Four? Pandemonium breaks out throughout the stadium as the People crowd stand to a person , wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream, Give the person another chance! Give the person another chance!
So if anyone wants to make one up for my race creed or what ever I am feel free to go right ahead if it's funny I'll laugh if it's not I won't .
life is too short sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me
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OK, so Paddy came to Australia and was being assessed for possible career opportunities. The assessor asked him what his IQ was. "Umm wot is dis oi kew ting den?" The assessor explained that it was his intelligence quotient. "Well wot duz dis intelligence ting do den?" asks Paddy again. It shows us how smart you are, if you have an IQ of 100, you have an average intelligence. "OK den, wot if Oi have an oi kew of 100, wot could Oi do?" Well you could do most things you put your mind to, says the assessor. "OK den, wot if Oi have an oi kew of 140, wot could Oi do?" Haha, if you had an IQ of 140 you'd be a genius, you could be a scientist, a doctor, or practically anything you wanted, says the assessor. "OK den, wot if Oi had an oi kew of 40, wot could Oi do?" Well if you had an IQ of 40, you'd have difficulty tying your own shoe laces joked the assessor. Paddy thought for a minute and says "Ahhh so dats woy you Aussies all wear thongs"
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When the power of Love becomes greater than the love of power the World will see peace ! 24ft Trailblazer 5th wheeler n 05 Patrol ute and Black Series Dominator camper trailer ( for the rough stuff)
How do Kiwi's find sheep in the long grass?
Delightful!
This was told to me by a Kiwi friend. I have found most Kiwi's have a great sense of humour And the ability to laugh at themselves much like most Aussies.
Now about Aboriginal jokes, I once nursed an elder and nearly had to wear continence aids as he made me laugh so much. He liked me because I would laugh and joke back.
He asked why I would laugh when so many would just walk away. I said that I was probably a racist. He said "Every is racist a little bit you me everyone. You have to live life not just worry what others think"
