Three old men were sitting together in the nursing home playing cards.

One said he was going up the stairs to have a bath.

As the two other men were not far away they could hear him; "Was I getting into the bath?, or out of the bath?","Was I getting into the bath?, or out of the bath?","Was I getting into the bath?, or out of the bath?"etc.

One of the men went up the stairs to help him, then stopped mid flight; "Was I going up the stairs or down the stairs?","Was I going up the stairs or down the stairs?", "Was I going up the stairs or down the stairs?".

The man left at the card table could hear them both;"Was I getting into the bath?, or out of the bath?","Was I getting into the bath? "or out of the bath? Was I going up the stairs or down the stairs?","Was I going up the stairs or down the stairs?"

"Oh god" he said to himself, "I hope I never end up like that, knock on wood" and he rapped the table with his knuckles.

"Hmmm" he said aloud "Now was that the front door or the back door?"