'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since my last

confession.  I had sex with Nookie Green twice last month.'

            The priest told the sinner, 'You are forgiven.  Go out and say

three Hail Mary's.'

            Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered the confessional .

'Father, it has been two months since my last confession.  I've had sex

with Nookie Green twice a week for the past two months.'

            This time, the priest questioned, 'Who is this Nookie Green?'

            'A new woman in the neighborhood ,' the sinner replied.

            'Very well,' sighed the priest.  'Go and say ten Hail Mary's.'

            At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the

sermon, a tall, voluptuous , drop-dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered

the sanctuary.  The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she

slowly sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest.  Her

dress was green and very short, and she wore matching, shiny emerald-green

shoes.

            The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green

dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart,

but just enough to reveal that she wasn't wearing any underwear.

            The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered, 'Is that

Nookie Green?'

            The bug-eyed altar boy couldn't believe his ears but managed to calmly reply,....

'No Father, I think it's just a reflection from her shoes'..