Harry and Wanda were 85 years old and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because Harry watched their pennies. Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to Wanda's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.
One day, their good health didn't help when they went on yet another holiday and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven. ? They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favourite clothes in the closet. They gasped in astonishment when he said, 'Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now.' Harry asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. 'Why, nothing,' Peter replied, 'remember, this is your reward in Heaven.' Harry looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth.. 'What are the greens fees?,' grumbled Harry.. 'This is heaven,' St. Peter replied. 'You can play for free, every day.' Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, free flowing beverages. 'Don't even ask,' said St. Peter to Harry. This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy.' Harry looked around and glanced nervously at Wanda. 'Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods and the decaffeinated tea?,' he asked. That's the best part,' St. Peter replied. 'You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!' 'No gym to work out at?' said Harry 'Not unless you want to,' was the answer. 'No testing my sugar or blood pressure or...' 'Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself.' Harry glared at Wanda and said, 'If it wasn't for you and your f*cking Bran Flakes. We could have been here ten years ago!'