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Kids..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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6
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1236
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Cow Dung..
(Preview)
A little bird was flying south for the winter.It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.While he was lying there, a cow came by and droppedsome dung on him.As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung,he began to realize how warm he was.The dung was actually thawing him o...
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aussie_paul
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1
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998
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Redneck Manners
(Preview)
PS FROM THE REDNECK BOOK OF MANNERS1.Never take a beer to a job interview.2.Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.3.It's considered poor taste to take a cooler to church.4..If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.5.Even if you're certain that you are inclu...
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rgren2
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2
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901
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Prostate examination..
(Preview)
A guy goes to his doctor for his physical and gets sent to a Urologist as a precaution.When he gets there, he discovers the Urologist is a lady doctorThe doctor says,"I'm going to check your prostate today, but this a new procedure andis a little different from what you are used to.I want you to lie on you...
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aussie_paul
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0
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685
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Pedestrians
(Preview)
Paddy was in New York...He was patiently waiting and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, 'Okay, pedestrians.' Then he'd allow the traffic to pass.He'd done this several times, and Paddy still stood on the sidewalk.After the cop had sho...
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anolphart
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0
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738
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PH please explain cartoons
(Preview)
Every friday on YouTube, I look forward to the latest release of Pauline Hansons "Please Explaine" cartoon. Maaaaate they are bloody ripsnorters, I you dont laugh you have lost your sence of humor
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Gundog
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8
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1305
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Old..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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1
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609
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Modern Love Story..
(Preview)
Modern Love Story..An elderly couple had just learned how to send text messages on their mobile phones. The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy.One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee.She decided to send her husband a romantic text message and she w...
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aussie_paul
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0
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725
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Old age..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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482
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As I grew older..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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557
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Typewriting..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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1
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820
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A mother-in-law
(Preview)
A mother-in-law doesn't trust her sons-in-law...she decides to test them.First, she goes to the oldest's house. She jumps into a well, but her son-in-law rescues her promptly. The next morning, the oldest son-in-law finds a brand new Suzuki in front of his house with a little note: "Lots of love, yo...
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aussie_paul
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0
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811
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Man retired..
(Preview)
Man retired and his wife said, that as the household income had fallen, he would have to stop drinking beerMan thought that it was a reasonable thing to do, and when they went shopping, he did not buy his carton of beerHe noticed his wife was buying make-up, so he asked if they could still afford it"But da...
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aussie_paul
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0
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645
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Man retired
(Preview)
Man retired and his wife said, that as the household income had fallen, he would have to stop drinking beerMan thought that it was a reasonable thing to do, and when they went shopping, he did not buy his carton of beerHe noticed his wife was buying make-up, so he asked if they could still afford it"But da...
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aussie_paul
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0
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495
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New definition for S.O.S.
(Preview)
An oldie but a good one. A C-130 Hercules was lumbering along when a ****y F-16 flashed by. The jet jockey decided to show off.The fighter jock told the C-130 pilot, 'watch this!' and promptly went into a barrel roll followed by a steep climb.He then finished with a sonic boom as he broke the sound barri...
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aussie_paul
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0
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592
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Playing with death..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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724
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A policeman
(Preview)
A policeman is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street.However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach.After watching the boy's efforts for some time the policeman walks up behind the little fello...
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aussie_paul
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0
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568
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The Lazy Worker
(Preview)
If you've ever worked for a boss who reacts before getting the facts and thinking things through, you will love this!Arcelor-Mittal Steel, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO.The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers.On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy...
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aussie_paul
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3
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905
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Finding your lost luggage..
(Preview)
Finding your lost luggage at the airport should be easy. However, that's not the case.My Grandad recently had to start using Viagra. Grandma took it pretty hard.My son asked: "Dad, are we pyromaniacs?" Yes, we arson.Just found out my mate has been shot with a starting pistol. Police think it's race-...
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aussie_paul
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1
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1442
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Modern Philosophers..
(Preview)
Modern Philosophers~ Betsy Salkind...Men are like linoleum floors. Lay 'em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years~ Jean Kerr...The only reason they say " Women and children first" is to test the strength of the lifeboats~Emo Philips...A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no mat...
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aussie_paul
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0
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704
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