Just Joking

anolphart · anolphart

rgren2 · rgren2

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve.Surprise, surprise.It was an Apple.But with extremely limited memory.Just 1 byte.Then everything crashed. -- Edited by aussie_paul on Friday 19th of May 2023 07:57:49 PM

anolphart · anolphart

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Health AdviceDo you have feelings of inadequacy?Do you suffer from shyness?Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?Do you feel stressed at times?...If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor orpharmacist about Cabernet Sauvignon.Cabernet Sauvignon is the safe, natur...

anolphart · anolphart

Some are old but all worth a read If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's a famous Erudite comic who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates." His mind sees things differently from the way most of us do. Here are some more of h...

anolphart · anolphart

Whenarewethere · Whenarewethere

What a joke (or maybe not depending on perspective). Russia shoots down 2 of its own planes & 3 of its own helicopters. SU34 us$36m SU35 us$50m SI8 us$17m Add guides missiles at say $4m a piece & not to forget lives. I can see why the parade of the immortals was cancelled. A touch embarrassing sh...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.4. I asked my wife where sh...

Bobdown · Bobdown

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push."Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!"He slams the door and returns to bed."Who was that?" asked...

BarneyBDB · BarneyBDB

rgren2 · rgren2

Quasimodo went to his doctor."How can I help you,' asked the doctor."I just don't feel right,' replied Quasimodo"OK,can you take off all your clothes and we'll try to find out what's wrong." said the doctor.Quasimodo took off ten vests,eight shirts and fourteen jumpers.''When was the last time yo...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

After nearly 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the wife felt her husband, begin to massage her in ways he hadn't in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then caressed her shoulders and...

rgren2 · rgren2

Whenarewethere · Whenarewethere

' There was one tank at the parade in Moscow! T-34! We laugh all over Ukraine. This entire spectacle was so underwhelming, it was so bad, it looked like low budget parody depicting a superpower, like a cutscene from a Seagal's movie. Of course, Putin didn't disappoint us by delivering another varia...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Saturday Morning, Weather was to bad to work outside,I was bored with nothing to do,Suddenly, there was a knock on the door,I opened it to find a well dressed young man standing there who said,Good morning Sir, "I'm a Jehovah's witness"Well I said, You had better come in and have a cup of Coffee,With th...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The night was moonless, bleak and heavy with misting rain.There had been a terrible accident.The wet crumpled body was lifted with careful hands from the twisted wreckage to the waiting gurney.Flashing red lights alone lit the night and the shining lifeless face.Much later, the last survivor, la...

dorian · dorian

Government housing is much better than when I was growing up, claims Prime Minister from steps of Kirribilli House:[url]https://chaser.com.au/national/government-housing-is-much-better-than-when-i-was-growing-up-claims-prime-minister-from-steps-of-kirribilli-house/[/u...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for the clue.Well, he said, Its what mommy...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	DIY camp chair (Preview)	anolphart	2	705	08:52 AM May 23, 2023 by Possum3
	BadDrivers (Preview)	rgren2	4	895	05:26 PM May 22, 2023 by Craig1
	The oldest computer (Preview) The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve.Surprise, surprise.It was an Apple.But with extremely limited memory.Just 1 byte.Then everything crashed. -- Edited by aussie_paul on Friday 19th of May 2023 07:57:49 PM	aussie_paul	5	987	06:40 AM May 21, 2023 by Blues Man
	Some chuckles (Preview)	anolphart	0	1043	05:58 PM May 16, 2023 by anolphart
	Health Advice... (Preview) Health AdviceDo you have feelings of inadequacy?Do you suffer from shyness?Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?Do you feel stressed at times?...If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor orpharmacist about Cabernet Sauvignon.Cabernet Sauvignon is the safe, natur...	aussie_paul	1	1053	01:31 PM May 16, 2023 by Southern Cruizer
	Steven Wright (Preview) Some are old but all worth a read If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's a famous Erudite comic who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates." His mind sees things differently from the way most of us do. Here are some more of h...	anolphart	2	1088	10:05 AM May 16, 2023 by Craig1
	The solution to our power problems (Preview)	anolphart	0	883	08:29 AM May 16, 2023 by anolphart
	A joke shooting down your own air platforms (Preview) What a joke (or maybe not depending on perspective). Russia shoots down 2 of its own planes & 3 of its own helicopters. SU34 us$36m SU35 us$50m SI8 us$17m Add guides missiles at say $4m a piece & not to forget lives. I can see why the parade of the immortals was cancelled. A touch embarrassing sh...	Whenarewethere	4	1071	03:33 PM May 15, 2023 by dorian
	Rules. (Preview) 1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.4. I asked my wife where sh...	aussie_paul	0	950	02:29 PM May 15, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Australia as well (Preview)	Bobdown	2	1040	10:59 AM May 15, 2023 by grahos
	Need a Push... (Preview) A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push."Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!"He slams the door and returns to bed."Who was that?" asked...	aussie_paul	0	843	08:13 PM May 14, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Seriously?? (Preview)	BarneyBDB	11	1333	08:03 PM May 14, 2023 by Cube
	Quasimodo (Preview) Quasimodo went to his doctor."How can I help you,' asked the doctor."I just don't feel right,' replied Quasimodo"OK,can you take off all your clothes and we'll try to find out what's wrong." said the doctor.Quasimodo took off ten vests,eight shirts and fourteen jumpers.''When was the last time yo...	rgren2	0	758	08:04 PM May 13, 2023 by rgren2
	After nearly 50 years of marriage.... (Preview) After nearly 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the wife felt her husband, begin to massage her in ways he hadn't in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then caressed her shoulders and...	aussie_paul	0	1014	10:44 AM May 12, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Coronation (Preview)	rgren2	2	1429	01:27 PM May 11, 2023 by rgren2
	Stalin 1940s Ukraine tank (Preview) ' There was one tank at the parade in Moscow! T-34! We laugh all over Ukraine. This entire spectacle was so underwhelming, it was so bad, it looked like low budget parody depicting a superpower, like a cutscene from a Seagal's movie. Of course, Putin didn't disappoint us by delivering another varia...	Whenarewethere	0	836	04:29 AM May 11, 2023 by Whenarewethere
	Visited by a Jehovah's witness (Preview) Saturday Morning, Weather was to bad to work outside,I was bored with nothing to do,Suddenly, there was a knock on the door,I opened it to find a well dressed young man standing there who said,Good morning Sir, "I'm a Jehovah's witness"Well I said, You had better come in and have a cup of Coffee,With th...	aussie_paul	3	1302	12:22 PM May 10, 2023 by Nifty150
	A Positive Attitude The Australian way (Preview) The night was moonless, bleak and heavy with misting rain.There had been a terrible accident.The wet crumpled body was lifted with careful hands from the twisted wreckage to the waiting gurney.Flashing red lights alone lit the night and the shining lifeless face.Much later, the last survivor, la...	aussie_paul	1	1198	09:15 PM May 8, 2023 by Bicyclecamper
	Government housing is much better than when I was growing up (Preview) Government housing is much better than when I was growing up, claims Prime Minister from steps of Kirribilli House:[url]https://chaser.com.au/national/government-housing-is-much-better-than-when-i-was-growing-up-claims-prime-minister-from-steps-of-kirribilli-house/[/u...	dorian	1	1070	08:56 PM May 6, 2023 by RickJ
	Oh Deer. (Preview) A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for the clue.Well, he said, Its what mommy...	aussie_paul	0	934	03:28 PM May 6, 2023 by aussie_paul
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