Just Joking

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The policeman stood and faced his God,Which must always come to pass.He hoped his shoes were shining.Just as brightly as his brass."Step forward now, policeman.How shall I deal with you?Have you always turned the other cheek?To My church have you been true?"The policeman squared his shoulders an...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A Cup of Tea made with cold water.One day my Grandma was out, and my Grandpa was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old. Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a gift, and it was one of my favourite toys.Grandpa was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought him a little cup of 'tea'...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A golfer was involved in a terrible car crash and was rushed to the hospital. Just before he was put under, the surgeon popped in to see him."I have some good news and some bad news," says the surgeon. "The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!""Oh God no!" cries the man. "My golfing is over! Plea...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Well FINALLY, it just had to come to this sooner or later!A blond man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts: "Did you find the shampoo?"He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do... it's for dry hair, and I've just wet mine."------------------------------ ------A blond man spies a letter lying on h...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

anolphart · anolphart

Southern Cruizer · Southern Cruizer

anolphart · anolphart

When other activists glued themselves to the floor of the Volkswagen plant - also in Germany, Volkswagen management sent all the employees home and turned the lights out. When they came in the next day, the activists complained that they had to pee and poop in their pants. I'm starting to like th...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Craig1 · Craig1

A young Sydney woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the Harbour. Just before she could throw herself off Circular Quay, a handsome young man stopped her. "You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow y...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and,upon returning to her car, found four malesin the act of leaving with her vehicle.She dropped her shopping bags ...and drew her handgun,proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs,"I have a gun, and I know how to use it!Get out of the car - NOW!"The four men d...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

I did not...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Most seniors never get enough exercise.In His Wisdom God decreed that seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their glasses, keys and other things thus doing more walking.And God looked down and saw that it was good.Then God saw there was another need.In His Wisdom He made seniors l...

Collo · Collo

Matto from the Woolworths Everyday Home Insurance ad reckons he has his own piece of paradise, to me it looks like just another piece of suburbia! He also needs to sell his ride on mower and buy a push mower!! Collo.

anolphart · anolphart

dorian · dorian

India official drains entire dam to retrieve phone: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-65726193A government official in India has been suspended after he ordered a reservoir to be drained to retrieve his phone.It took three days to pump millions of litres of water out of...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police."What are those knives doing in your car?" Asked the officer."I use them in my juggling act," says the juggler."Oh yeah? Let`s see you do it." Says the policeman.So the man gets out of the car and starts tossing and juggling the knive...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've got some bad news.You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order..'The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting."Well, daughter, we women celebrate when t...

Craig1 · Craig1

Albo has cancelled his Voice Proposal. After declaring the Whole of Greater Sydney a suburb of Mumbai, and hence no longer under his control, he said, well bugger it. Geelong Council has also ceceeded from the country after voting to abandon Australia Day, so they can eat curry as well.

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Final Inspection (Preview) The policeman stood and faced his God,Which must always come to pass.He hoped his shoes were shining.Just as brightly as his brass."Step forward now, policeman.How shall I deal with you?Have you always turned the other cheek?To My church have you been true?"The policeman squared his shoulders an...	aussie_paul	2	942	11:24 AM May 31, 2023 by yobarr
	ONLY A GRANDMOTHER WOULD KNOW.... (Preview) A Cup of Tea made with cold water.One day my Grandma was out, and my Grandpa was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old. Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a gift, and it was one of my favourite toys.Grandpa was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought him a little cup of 'tea'...	aussie_paul	1	770	04:21 PM May 30, 2023 by Craig1
	If at first... (Preview)	aussie_paul	0	450	12:43 PM May 30, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Golfer has an accident... 🙂 (Preview) A golfer was involved in a terrible car crash and was rushed to the hospital. Just before he was put under, the surgeon popped in to see him."I have some good news and some bad news," says the surgeon. "The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!""Oh God no!" cries the man. "My golfing is over! Plea...	aussie_paul	0	392	12:41 PM May 30, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Blond Men... (Preview) Well FINALLY, it just had to come to this sooner or later!A blond man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts: "Did you find the shampoo?"He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do... it's for dry hair, and I've just wet mine."------------------------------ ------A blond man spies a letter lying on h...	aussie_paul	0	357	12:35 PM May 30, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Asked the kids... (Preview)	aussie_paul	0	543	10:52 AM May 30, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Cheap Renewables (Preview)	anolphart	4	884	09:26 AM May 30, 2023 by Craig1
	Sad Indians (Preview)	Southern Cruizer	1	718	07:51 AM May 30, 2023 by anolphart
	Eco Warrior (Preview) When other activists glued themselves to the floor of the Volkswagen plant - also in Germany, Volkswagen management sent all the employees home and turned the lights out. When they came in the next day, the activists complained that they had to pee and poop in their pants. I'm starting to like th...	anolphart	0	544	04:19 PM May 29, 2023 by anolphart
	lol... (Preview)	aussie_paul	3	692	11:36 AM May 29, 2023 by Whenarewethere
	sailing to Italy (Preview) A young Sydney woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the Harbour. Just before she could throw herself off Circular Quay, a handsome young man stopped her. "You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow y...	Craig1	0	395	08:34 PM May 28, 2023 by Craig1
	Gangsta Nanny... (Preview) An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and,upon returning to her car, found four malesin the act of leaving with her vehicle.She dropped her shopping bags ...and drew her handgun,proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs,"I have a gun, and I know how to use it!Get out of the car - NOW!"The four men d...	aussie_paul	2	840	08:11 PM May 28, 2023 by watsea
	I did not.... (Preview) I did not...	aussie_paul	0	570	02:08 PM May 28, 2023 by aussie_paul
	God's plan for aging (Preview) Most seniors never get enough exercise.In His Wisdom God decreed that seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their glasses, keys and other things thus doing more walking.And God looked down and saw that it was good.Then God saw there was another need.In His Wisdom He made seniors l...	aussie_paul	0	440	11:29 AM May 28, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Matto (Preview) Matto from the Woolworths Everyday Home Insurance ad reckons he has his own piece of paradise, to me it looks like just another piece of suburbia! He also needs to sell his ride on mower and buy a push mower!! Collo.	Collo	5	988	07:46 AM May 28, 2023 by Whenarewethere
	Winstonisms (Preview)	anolphart	0	506	08:59 PM May 27, 2023 by anolphart
	India official drains entire dam to retrieve phone (Preview) India official drains entire dam to retrieve phone: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-65726193A government official in India has been suspended after he ordered a reservoir to be drained to retrieve his phone.It took three days to pump millions of litres of water out of...	dorian	4	599	03:55 PM May 27, 2023 by Craig1
	A juggler, (Preview) A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police."What are those knives doing in your car?" Asked the officer."I use them in my juggling act," says the juggler."Oh yeah? Let`s see you do it." Says the policeman.So the man gets out of the car and starts tossing and juggling the knive...	aussie_paul	0	415	02:43 PM May 27, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Putting your affairs in order.... (Preview) The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've got some bad news.You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order..'The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting."Well, daughter, we women celebrate when t...	aussie_paul	1	550	07:32 PM May 26, 2023 by Southern Cruizer
	Albo Cancels Voice Referrendum (Preview) Albo has cancelled his Voice Proposal. After declaring the Whole of Greater Sydney a suburb of Mumbai, and hence no longer under his control, he said, well bugger it. Geelong Council has also ceceeded from the country after voting to abandon Australia Day, so they can eat curry as well.	Craig1	1	737	04:21 PM May 25, 2023 by Greg 1
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