Just Joking

JRH · JRH

A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine. 'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la Casa.' 'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.' A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?' Instead of giving...

drongo & wendy · drongo & wendy

My misses asked me "watcha doing today" I said nuttin She said u done that yesterday I said "i aint finished yet ___________________ Man comes home and finds his wife in bed with one of his mates. So he shoots him dead. Wife says u keep doing that your gunna...

drongo & wendy · drongo & wendy

There was this 10 year old boy walking down the street dragging a squashed frog on a string. He walked up to a house of ill repute and knocked on the door. The Madam answered the door , looked down at the little boy and asked what he wanted, he said i want to have sex with one of your girls, i have money and im no...

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

The following are all replies that Manchester women have written on Child Support Agency Forms in the section for listing "father's details;" or putting it another way.... Who's your Daddy? These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to checkout #10. It takes 1st prize and #3 is ru...

sgntbilko · sgntbilko

The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've some bad news. You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order.' The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting. 'Well daughter, we women celebrate when things...

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor. NAME____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_______...

dave06 · dave06

The chief woman 'Greenie Tree-Hugging Activist', who was responsible for getting horses banned from National parks and State forests, was climbing a tree to have a look out over the forest when a Tawny Frogmouth Owl attacked her for invading its nesting site. In a panic to escape, she slid down t...

dave06 · dave06

: BREAKING NEWS ::: Due to the recession in 2009 the government will start deporting all the mentally ill people to save money. I started crying when I thought of you. Run my little crazy friends, run! Well, what can I say ??? Someone sent it to me, and dammit, I'm NOT going alone !!?

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

Paddy was a youthful and hard working Irishman at a Coastal village in Ireland . Daily he would pole a heavy old punt out to sea then work a heavy iron grapple to bring up the sand oysters which he sold to the local ice works. He was a man of regular habits he always arrived home each day at a certain time. Sad...

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

Two blokes in a pub and one makes the statement "Do you know Lions have sex 10 times a day". Mate replies "Bugger me I just joined Rotary "

dave06 · dave06

A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the baby's father. He asked if they were willing to try it out Both said they...

Viagra users take note. · Road Ranger

If you are using Viagra put it in a cup of tea, as this will stop your buscuit going soft when you dunk it

sgntbilko · sgntbilko

Someone out there is deadly at Scrabble. (Wait till you see the last one)! DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER ASTRONOMER: When you rearrange the letters: MOON STARER DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letter...

dave06 · dave06

in a park in metropilos was found a pair of statues, one male one female, staring at each other, through what seemed like very loving eyes for eternity, knowing in their stone hearts that they could never be together a kind hearted angel was flittering about (as they are known to do) minding his own bus...

Roostertales · Roostertales

The Queen & Dolly Go To Heaven !! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven. Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide whi...

mike and Judy · mike and Judy

.. Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad. (For Those of you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town, west of Quilpie in the far south west of Queensland ) Dear Mum & Dad, I am well. Hope you are too. Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that the Army is better than workin' on the station - te...

Road Ranger · Road Ranger

http://www.newsday.com/news/opinion/ny-walt-babyboomers-blurb,0,1036393.blurb

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

I'll bet they change that tail number ASAP

Roostertales · Roostertales

A fella comes into his vet in tears holding his apparently dead dog and says "doc you gotta help me - I luv him dearly is there anything you can for him ?" (by the way readers I am adlibbing this a bit) The vet who can obviously see the dog is dear departed says "well ok bring him in here and put...

Roostertales · Roostertales

. Wife from Hell A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.The driver says, Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating. Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: Now dont be silly dear, you k...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Masculine or Feminine (Preview) A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine. 'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la Casa.' 'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.' A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?' Instead of giving...	JRH	1	1040	03:01 PM Mar 13, 2009 by drongo & wendy
	a couple of quickies (Preview) My misses asked me "watcha doing today" I said nuttin She said u done that yesterday I said "i aint finished yet ___________________ Man comes home and finds his wife in bed with one of his mates. So he shoots him dead. Wife says u keep doing that your gunna...	drongo & wendy	2	921	12:07 PM Mar 13, 2009 by drongo & wendy
	my frog (Preview) There was this 10 year old boy walking down the street dragging a squashed frog on a string. He walked up to a house of ill repute and knocked on the door. The Madam answered the door , looked down at the little boy and asked what he wanted, he said i want to have sex with one of your girls, i have money and im no...	drongo & wendy	0	1001	09:17 AM Mar 13, 2009 by drongo & wendy
	Sad but True (Preview) The following are all replies that Manchester women have written on Child Support Agency Forms in the section for listing "father's details;" or putting it another way.... Who's your Daddy? These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to checkout #10. It takes 1st prize and #3 is ru...	Wombat 280	0	1066	09:16 PM Mar 12, 2009 by Wombat 280
	PUTTING YOUR AFFAIRS IN ORDER (Preview) The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've some bad news. You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order.' The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting. 'Well daughter, we women celebrate when things...	sgntbilko	1	971	08:34 PM Mar 12, 2009 by Wombat 280
	Protective Father (Preview) APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor. NAME____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_______...	Wombat 280	0	1318	08:31 PM Mar 12, 2009 by Wombat 280
	endangered tree's revenge (Preview) The chief woman 'Greenie Tree-Hugging Activist', who was responsible for getting horses banned from National parks and State forests, was climbing a tree to have a look out over the forest when a Tawny Frogmouth Owl attacked her for invading its nesting site. In a panic to escape, she slid down t...	dave06	3	1102	01:13 PM Mar 12, 2009 by dave06
	urgent request (Preview) : BREAKING NEWS ::: Due to the recession in 2009 the government will start deporting all the mentally ill people to save money. I started crying when I thought of you. Run my little crazy friends, run! Well, what can I say ??? Someone sent it to me, and dammit, I'm NOT going alone !!?	dave06	7	1192	01:04 PM Mar 12, 2009 by JRH
	What Killed Paddy (Preview) Paddy was a youthful and hard working Irishman at a Coastal village in Ireland . Daily he would pole a heavy old punt out to sea then work a heavy iron grapple to bring up the sand oysters which he sold to the local ice works. He was a man of regular habits he always arrived home each day at a certain time. Sad...	Wombat 280	1	1004	01:23 PM Mar 11, 2009 by sgntbilko
	Lions- V -Rotary (Preview) Two blokes in a pub and one makes the statement "Do you know Lions have sex 10 times a day". Mate replies "Bugger me I just joined Rotary "	Wombat 280	1	1196	02:59 PM Mar 10, 2009 by sgntbilko
	pain releif (Preview) A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the baby's father. He asked if they were willing to try it out Both said they...	dave06	0	1021	12:37 PM Mar 9, 2009 by dave06
	Viagra users take note. (Preview) If you are using Viagra put it in a cup of tea, as this will stop your buscuit going soft when you dunk it	Road Ranger	8	1326	11:03 AM Mar 9, 2009 by Road Ranger
	THIS IS CLEVER (Preview) Someone out there is deadly at Scrabble. (Wait till you see the last one)! DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER ASTRONOMER: When you rearrange the letters: MOON STARER DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letter...	sgntbilko	1	1107	12:48 PM Mar 8, 2009 by Road Ranger
	the two statues (Preview) in a park in metropilos was found a pair of statues, one male one female, staring at each other, through what seemed like very loving eyes for eternity, knowing in their stone hearts that they could never be together a kind hearted angel was flittering about (as they are known to do) minding his own bus...	dave06	0	926	12:42 PM Mar 8, 2009 by dave06
	The Queen and Dolly go to heaven (Preview) The Queen & Dolly Go To Heaven !! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven. Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide whi...	Roostertales	0	1055	06:03 PM Mar 5, 2009 by Roostertales
	Life in the Australian Army (Preview) .. Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad. (For Those of you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town, west of Quilpie in the far south west of Queensland ) Dear Mum & Dad, I am well. Hope you are too. Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that the Army is better than workin' on the station - te...	mike and Judy	2	1197	05:47 PM Mar 5, 2009 by Wombat 280
	A (mate) sent me this. (Preview) http://www.newsday.com/news/opinion/ny-walt-babyboomers-blurb,0,1036393.blurb	Road Ranger	0	920	01:42 PM Mar 5, 2009 by Road Ranger
	Tail Number (Preview) I'll bet they change that tail number ASAP	Wombat 280	2	1121	01:30 PM Mar 5, 2009 by Road Ranger
	Heard this on 774 am this morning - a dog story (Preview) A fella comes into his vet in tears holding his apparently dead dog and says "doc you gotta help me - I luv him dearly is there anything you can for him ?" (by the way readers I am adlibbing this a bit) The vet who can obviously see the dog is dear departed says "well ok bring him in here and put...	Roostertales	1	894	07:02 PM Mar 4, 2009 by sgntbilko
	wife from hell !!!! (Preview) . Wife from Hell A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.The driver says, Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating. Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: Now dont be silly dear, you k...	Roostertales	1	1238	06:55 PM Mar 3, 2009 by sgntbilko
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