Just Joking

goinsoon · goinsoon

You know you are a loser when a nymphomaniac says to you "Lets just be friends"

jimricho · jimricho

Here's something to think about. I recently went to a new doctor. After 2 visits, & exhaustive Lab tests, he said I was doing 'fairly well' for my age. I'm about 60. A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him "Do you think I'll live to be 80?" He asked "Do you...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

The science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, 'Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?' No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, 'You should not be asking sixth graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the P...

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A little Poem for the Seniors... Another year has passed and we're all a little older. Last summer felt hotter and winter seems much colder. There was a time not long ago when life was quite a blast. Now I fully un...

Cruising Granny · Cruising Granny

THIS OUGHT TO MAKE GRANDPA FEEL ALL WARM & FUZZY A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa. When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into Grandpa's room .. "Grandpa, Grandpa," she says excitedly, "As soon as...

Solomon · Solomon

jimricho · jimricho

By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 'TANJOOBERRYMUTTS' I am sure I have spoken to this person, or at least his brother The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service in a hotel ... Room Service : "Morrin. Roon sirbees." Guest : "Sorry, I...

clazandaza · clazandaza

Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in.Calling the auto club is not an option. I will win. ______________________________________________ Because I'm a man , when the car isn't running very well,I will pop the hood and...

Solomon · Solomon

Solomon · Solomon

A restaurant has a sign that says "$500" if we fail to fill your order." A customer decides to test it by ordering "elephant ears on rye bread". The waitress takes his order to the kitchen. Seconds later, the chef storms out, goes to the customer's table and slams down $500...

grandaddon · grandaddon

Solomon · Solomon

Ginger · Ginger

I was not sure where to put this so decided to put it here. I know you have all seen sidewalk art. I thought this one was rather neat. Julian Beever is an English artist whos famous for his art on the pavement of England, France, Germany, USA, Australia and Belgium. Most of his artwork it is impossible to t...

Onedodger · Onedodger

Hangover Ratings 1 star hangover No pain. no real feeling of illness. You slept in your own bed and when you woke up there were no traffic cones in there with you. You are still able to function relatively well on the energy stored up from all those vodka and Red Bulls. However, you can drink 10 bottl...

Solomon · Solomon

A crowded United Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the counter. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." T...

Zoomtopz · Zoomtopz

The Pope was going to have a shower one day . Allthough his ideas were very strict on celibacy , there was also a need to occasionally exercise the papal wrist , this happened to be one of those occasions . Just as the holy seeds were flying through the air , the pope noticed a photographer taking pics . Hold...

Ginger · Ginger

TWENTY-THREE THINGS Yes I know it has been around a while but sometimes these things need to be re- read TWENTY-THREE THINGS YOU SHOULD HAVE LEARNED BY NOW 1. If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often. 3. Going to church does...

Solomon · Solomon

A 2007 study found that the average Australian walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that the average Australian drinks 22 gallons of beer a year. That means the average Australian gets about 41 miles per gallon. That's bloody good value!

justcruisin01 · justcruisin01

A man was riding his Harley beside a Sydney beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, The Lord said. 'Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.' The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to New Zealand so I can ride over anytime I w...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	LOSER (Preview) You know you are a loser when a nymphomaniac says to you "Lets just be friends"	goinsoon	0	797	07:39 PM Apr 20, 2010 by goinsoon
	Will I live to 80? (Preview) Here's something to think about. I recently went to a new doctor. After 2 visits, & exhaustive Lab tests, he said I was doing 'fairly well' for my age. I'm about 60. A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him "Do you think I'll live to be 80?" He asked "Do you...	jimricho	1	1024	11:53 AM Apr 15, 2010 by Pam
	WAITING; (Preview)	justcruisin01	0	914	01:43 PM Apr 9, 2010 by justcruisin01
	OPEN MIND; (Preview) The science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, 'Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?' No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, 'You should not be asking sixth graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the P...	justcruisin01	0	1069	01:36 PM Apr 9, 2010 by justcruisin01
	SENIORS;; (Preview) *A little Poem for the Seniors...* *Another year has passed* *and we're all a little older. Last summer felt hotter and winter seems much colder. There was a time not long ago when life was quite a blast. Now I fully un...*	justcruisin01	0	984	01:35 PM Apr 9, 2010 by justcruisin01
	Kiss Grandpa (Preview) THIS OUGHT TO MAKE GRANDPA FEEL ALL WARM & FUZZY A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa. When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into Grandpa's room .. "Grandpa, Grandpa," she says excitedly, "As soon as...	Cruising Granny	0	1042	07:38 PM Apr 5, 2010 by Cruising Granny
	More pet trouble (Preview)	Solomon	1	889	11:09 PM Apr 1, 2010 by capt cream bun
	TANJOOBERRYMUTTS (Preview) By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 'TANJOOBERRYMUTTS' I am sure I have spoken to this person, or at least his brother The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service in a hotel ... Room Service : "Morrin. Roon sirbees." Guest : "Sorry, I...	jimricho	4	1460	05:41 PM Apr 1, 2010 by jimricho
	We are MEN. (Preview) Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in.Calling the auto club is not an option. I will win. ______________________________________________ Because I'm a man , when the car isn't running very well,I will pop the hood and...	clazandaza	3	1197	04:19 PM Apr 1, 2010 by Ma
	Pet trouble (Preview)	Solomon	0	796	02:00 PM Mar 30, 2010 by Solomon
	You got me ! (Preview) A restaurant has a sign that says "$500" if we fail to fill your order." A customer decides to test it by ordering "elephant ears on rye bread". The waitress takes his order to the kitchen. Seconds later, the chef storms out, goes to the customer's table and slams down $500...	Solomon	0	963	07:45 PM Mar 24, 2010 by Solomon
	Going to Church!! (Preview)	grandaddon	1	800	07:07 PM Mar 24, 2010 by JRH
	An oldie (Preview)	Solomon	0	737	08:06 AM Mar 22, 2010 by Solomon
	Coke bottle (Preview) I was not sure where to put this so decided to put it here. I know you have all seen sidewalk art. I thought this one was rather neat. Julian Beever is an English artist whos famous for his art on the pavement of England, France, Germany, USA, Australia and Belgium. Most of his artwork it is impossible to t...	Ginger	5	1051	08:18 PM Mar 21, 2010 by Ginger
	Hangover Rating (Preview) Hangover Ratings 1 star hangover No pain. no real feeling of illness. You slept in your own bed and when you woke up there were no traffic cones in there with you. You are still able to function relatively well on the energy stored up from all those vodka and Red Bulls. However, you can drink 10 bottl...	Onedodger	0	903	05:39 PM Mar 21, 2010 by Onedodger
	The booking agent (Preview) A crowded United Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the counter. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." T...	Solomon	0	841	10:02 AM Mar 18, 2010 by Solomon
	The Pope & That camera (Preview) The Pope was going to have a shower one day . Allthough his ideas were very strict on celibacy , there was also a need to occasionally exercise the papal wrist , this happened to be one of those occasions . Just as the holy seeds were flying through the air , the pope noticed a photographer taking pics . Hold...	Zoomtopz	0	922	06:55 AM Mar 18, 2010 by Zoomtopz
	23 things (Preview) TWENTY-THREE THINGS Yes I know it has been around a while but sometimes these things need to be re- read TWENTY-THREE THINGS YOU SHOULD HAVE LEARNED BY NOW 1. If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often. 3. Going to church does...	Ginger	1	1030	11:12 AM Mar 17, 2010 by clazandaza
	Good value (Preview) A 2007 study found that the average Australian walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that the average Australian drinks 22 gallons of beer a year. That means the average Australian gets about 41 miles per gallon. That's bloody good value!	Solomon	0	707	09:14 PM Mar 14, 2010 by Solomon
	GRANTED WISH; (Preview) A man was riding his Harley beside a Sydney beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, The Lord said. 'Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.' The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to New Zealand so I can ride over anytime I w...	justcruisin01	1	815	09:20 PM Mar 12, 2010 by Pam
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