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AUSTRALIA
(Preview)
A Somalian arrives in Australia as a new immigrant. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says........ 'Thank you Mr. Australian for letting me in this country, giving me housing, money for food, free medical care, free education and no taxes!' The passer by says,...
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robell
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0
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971
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Peanuts
(Preview)
A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. She rep...
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sucastja
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1
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645
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Sex Starved
(Preview)
A new Army Captain was assigned to an outfit in a remote post in the Afghan Desert . During his first inspection of the outfit, he noticed a camel hitched up behind the mess tent. He asked the Sergeant why the camel was kept there. The nervous sergeant said, 'Sir, as you know, there are 250 men here on the po...
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robell
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2
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1142
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Good Samaritan
(Preview)
CATHOLIC GENTLEMAN AN ELDERLY ITALIAN, CATHOLIC GENTLEMAN An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Rimini , Italy , went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said: "Father, during World War II, a beautiful...
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robell
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0
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773
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OLD F*RTS
(Preview)
OLD F*RT PRIDE I'm passing this on as I did not want to be the only old f*rt receiving it. Actually, it's not a bad thing to be called, as you will see. # Old F*rts are easy to spot at sporting events; during the playing of the National Anthem. Old F*rts remove their caps and stand at attention and sing withou...
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robell
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0
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924
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Why Osama Bin Laden had no chance of escaping
(Preview)
Someone had time on their hands
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Dunco
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2
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959
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Retirement
(Preview)
One day, while going to the shop, I passed by a retirement village. On the front lawn were six old ladies, lying naked on the grass. I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way. On my return trip, I passed the same retirement village with the same six old ladies lying naked on the lawn. This tim...
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Cruising Granny
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6
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1340
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GOOD OLE HANGIN
(Preview)
Dunno it just tickled my fancy
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goinsoon
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2
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952
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gubby you thought
(Preview)
[IMG]https://i131.photobucket.com/albums/p294/wombat100/Gubby2.jpg[/IMG...
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_wombat_
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13
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1408
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A Blonde Orders A Beer.....
(Preview)
A blonde orders a beer. The bartender fills the mug and slides it down the bar. It hits the blonde woman's breasts and splashes all over them. The bartender goes over, retrieves the mug and licks the beer off her breasts.Each time the blonde calls for another beer this happens. So after the third...
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Firefly
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1
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1059
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Hope not too Hot!
(Preview)
The daughter did, and her hands warmed up. The next day the daughter was riding with her boyfriend who said, 'My hands are freezing cold.' The girl replied, 'Put them between my legs and the warmth of my body will warm them up.. He did and warmed his hands. The following day the boyfriend was again in...
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jimbo
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2
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1327
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Jack pic
(Preview)
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_wombat_
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1
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936
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Baby Boomer Test
(Preview)
(Have a paper and pencil handy to record your answers. Your mind isn't as sharp as it once was!) This is NOT a pushover test. It's a Baby Boomer era test! There are 19 questions. Average score is 12. This one will be difficult for the younger set. Have fun, but no peeking! Let us know your sco...
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Firefly
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29
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2157
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HIS AND HER DIARY FOR THE SAME DAY:
(Preview)
HIS AND HER DIARY FOR THE SAME DAY: Her Diary: Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on...
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jimricho
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2
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989
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The Trap
(Preview)
Subject: FW: The TrapThe husband and his young wife were not on good terms. In fact the wife was convinced that he was carrying on with the pretty housemaid, so she laid a trap. One Friday afternoon she sent the housemaid home for the weekend, and didnt tell her husband. That nigh...
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jimbo
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1
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849
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Wheelchair Mahem
(Preview)
If you don't laugh at this one, your dead! Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loved to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors. Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a picnic the other residents tolerated he...
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robell
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0
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1157
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Mum Test
(Preview)
THE MUM TEST I was out walking with my 4-year-old daughter. She picked up something off of the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that. 'Why?' my daughter asked. 'Because it's been on the ground; you don't know where it's been, it's dirty, And pro...
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Firefly
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3
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1203
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OLDIES
(Preview)
Three elderly gentlemen were talking about what their grandchildren would be saying about them fifty years from now. "I would like my grandchildren to say, 'He was successful in business'," declared the first man. "Fifty years from now," said the second, "I want them t...
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goinsoon
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1
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1251
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Pet Humour
(Preview)
I did a search for this but couldn't find it, if it has been posted previously I apologise but it is still worth repeating; Pet Humour FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE or HAVE HAD PETS, THIS IS A TRUE STORY. FOR THOSE WHO DON'T HAVE OR HAVE NEVER HAD PETS, IT IS A TRUE STORY. The following was found posted very low on a...
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Vic
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2
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1726
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NO NO
(Preview)
God visited a man and told him he must give up smoking, drinking and sex if he wants to get into heaven..... The man said he would try his best. God visited the man a week later to see how he was getting on. "Not bad" said the man, "I've given up smoking and drinking but when the wife bent...
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robell
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1
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1197
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