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Bugs Bunny
(Preview)
A rabbit walks into a pub and says to the barman, 'Can I have a pint of beer, and a Ham and Cheese Toastie?' The barman is amazed, but gives the rabbit a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. The rabbit drinks the beer and eats the toastie. He then leaves. The following night the rabbit returns and again a...
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Wombat 280
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1
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1114
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God of Golf
(Preview)
A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair. She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration. 'What troubles you, Sister?' asked the Mother Superior. 'I thought this was the day you spent with your family.' 'It was,' sighed the Sister. 'And I went to play golf with my brother. We tr...
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twobob
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0
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639
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Important!!...Virus Warning...Nude photos
(Preview)
If you receive an email titled Nude Photo of Pauline Hanson DO NOT OPEN IT as it may contain a virus! If you receive an email titled Nude Photo of Julia Gillard DO NOT OPEN IT as may contain a nude photo of Julia Gillard!
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jimricho
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0
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1082
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Its a man thing
(Preview)
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt.. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! ' And they say blon...
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Gary and Kerry
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1
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840
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A Queensland Joke.
(Preview)
At a national conference of the Australian Hotels Association, the general managers of Cascade Brewery ( Tasmania ), Tooheys ( New South Wales ), XXXX ( Queensland ), CUB ( Victoria ) and Coopers ( South Australia ) found themselves sitting at the same table for lunch. When the waitress asked what the...
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Firefly
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2
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1308
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Charity
(Preview)
when will it end!!! I just had a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my clothes to the starving people throughout the world. I told them to P*ss off!! Anybody who fits into my clothes isn't starving!!
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twobob
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2
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916
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Rindercella and her sugly isters
(Preview)
WARNING; DON'T "DE-SPOONERISE" IF NAUGHTY WORDS OFFEND! In Memory Of A Great Man, The Late Ronnie Barker This was originally shown on BBC TV back in the seventies. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a sn igger (though god knows how many takes). Irony is that they received not one comp...
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jimricho
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9
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3803
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Losing Weight
(Preview)
Two Crocodiles were sitting at the side of LakeBurley Griffin in Canberra. The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, 'I can't understand howyou can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same sizeas kids. I just don't get it.' 'Well,' said the big Croc, 'what have you been ea...
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Wombat 280
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0
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946
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University of Life
(Preview)
A young jackaroo from outback Queensland goes off to university, but halfway through the semester he foolishly has squandered all of his money. He calls home. 'Dad,' he says, 'you won't believe what modern education is developing. They actually have a program here in Brisbane That will teac...
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Wombat 280
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0
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843
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Murder At Woolworths
(Preview)
Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy Marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems By taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the Beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed. A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-si...
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Firefly
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2
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711
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Travellers
(Preview)
Bob Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing in Europe.... as it happens, near Transylvania . They were driving in a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late and raining very hard. Bob could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control! Bob attempts...
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Firefly
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2
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1019
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Greenies n dingoes
(Preview)
The NSW Government and the NSW Greens party were recently presenting an alternative method to NSW Farmers for controlling that States rampant dingo population. It seems that after years of the farmers using the tried and true traditional methods of shooting or trapping the predators, the tree-h...
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jimricho
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1
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1009
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The Mallee Farmer
(Preview)
A Mallee farmer got into his ute, drove to a neighbouring farm and knocked at the farmhouse door. A young boy about 9 opened the door. "Is your Dad home?" the farmer asked. "No sir, he isn't," the boy replied. "He went into town." "Well," said the farmer, &q...
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Firefly
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1
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850
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MOUSE BALLS...
(Preview)
MOUSE BALLS... I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face. This was a real memo sent out by a computer company (IBM) to its employees in all seriousness. It went to all field engineers regarding a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite genuine. The engineers rolled...
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jimricho
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3
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929
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Little Susie
(Preview)
Little Susie goes home from school and tells her mum that the boys keep asking her to do cartwheels because she's very good at them. Mum said, "You should say no, they only want to look at your panties". Susie said, "I know they do, that's why I hide them in my bag".
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Firefly
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0
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669
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Two Nuns
(Preview)
Two nuns, Sister Catherine and Sister Helen, are traveling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a tiny little Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield. "Quick, quick!" shouts Si...
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suenami
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0
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772
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Mum
(Preview)
A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, And she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so muc...
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Firefly
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0
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847
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Smart Kid
(Preview)
A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy sees an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to put...
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Gary and Kerry
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1
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776
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Blonde flying to Melbourne
(Preview)
A plane is on its way to Melbourne when a Blonde in Economy Class gets up & moves to the First Class section and sits down The Flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the Blonde passenger that she will have to return to her Economy seat. The Blonde replies, 'I'm bl...
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jimricho
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1
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1054
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WARNING: A bit rude.
(Preview)
At the Senior Citizen's luncheon, an elderly gentleman and an elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that they both loved to fish. Since both of them were widowed, they decided to go fishing together the next day. The gentleman picked the lady up, and they headed to the river to his fishi...
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Firefly
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1
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1085
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