|
My Christmas greeting to y"all - hope it works...
(Preview)
No sorry it didnt dammit -please ignore this post.... merry christmas - pete -- Edited by petengail on Tuesday 20th of December 2011 04:26:27 PM
|
petengail
|
0
|
557
|
|
|
|
|
Male v Female rules at the bank
(Preview)
A new sign in the Bank reads: 'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After mo...
|
Rip and Rosie
|
5
|
853
|
|
|
|
|
An Irish Pub Joke
(Preview)
An Irish man has been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So your man stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside he stands up but again falls flat on his face. He...
|
Tonyg
|
0
|
581
|
|
|
|
|
Remember de days
(Preview)
Patrick walks into a bar in Dublin, Orders three pints of Guinness & sits in the corner of the room, Drinking a sip out of each pint in turn. When he had finished all three, He went back to the bar & ordered three more. The barman says, "You know a pint goes flat soon after I pull it ...........
|
Tonyg
|
1
|
800
|
|
|
|
|
santa and the new iphone with siri
(Preview)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=5qcmCUsw4EQ
|
milo
|
0
|
749
|
|
|
|
|
The ballarina
(Preview)
A large woman, wearing a sleeveless sundress, walked into a bar in Dublin, Ireland. She raised her right arm, revealing a huge, hairy armpit as she pointed to all the people sitting at the bar and asked, "What man here will buy a woman a drink?" The bar went silent as the patrons tried t...
|
jimbo
|
4
|
876
|
|
|
|
|
Can I have my Licence back?
(Preview)
Australian Cattle Station Pilot G'day Mate, I am writing to you because I need your help to get me bloody pilot's licence back. You keep telling me you got all the right contacts. Well now's your chance to make something happen for me because, mate, I'm bloody desperate. But first, I'd better tell you...
|
Happywanderer
|
8
|
1269
|
|
|
|
|
Where I've been
(Preview)
I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone. I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there. I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made s...
|
The Gnome
|
2
|
838
|
|
|
|
|
How to start a fight
(Preview)
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift The next year, I didnt buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, Well, you still havent used the gift I bought you last year! And thats how the fight started... ________________________________ My wife and I were...
|
Tonyg
|
0
|
612
|
|
|
|
|
BLONDIE!
(Preview)
A blonde was mowing the lawn in her garden and accidentally cut off the tail of her cat that was hiding in the grass. She rushed her cat, along with the tail, over to Woolworths. Why Woolworths ??? HELLOOOOOOOOO! Woolworths is the largest re-tailer in Australia !!!
|
justcruisin01
|
1
|
879
|
|
|
|
|
CONDOMS;
(Preview)
Condom factory burns down in New Zealand : The Prime Minister of New Zulland, is awoken at 4am by the telephone. Its the hilth Munister here. Sorry to bother you at this hour but there is an emergincy!! I've jist received word thet the Durex factory en Aucklind hes burned to the ground. It is isti...
|
justcruisin01
|
6
|
1027
|
|
|
|
|
I know-political jokes get elected
(Preview)
If I were a Business making good profits, I'd be telling them to buggar off.Julia Gillard called Bob Brown into his office one day and said,'Bob,I have a great idea! We are going to go all out to win the country voters.''Good idea Leader, how will we go about it?' said Julia.'Well,' said julia, 'we'll ge...
|
Zoomtopz
|
0
|
1201
|
|
|
|
|
GEN Y;
(Preview)
People born before 1946 were called The Silent and powerful generation.. - People born between 1946 and 1964 are called The Baby Boomers. - People born between 1965 and 1979 are called Generation X, . - And people born between 1980 and 2010 are called Generation Y , Why do we call the last gr...
|
justcruisin01
|
6
|
1012
|
|
|
|
|
have you been good this year?
(Preview)
|
milo
|
1
|
528
|
|
|
|
|
Drinks
(Preview)
|
lilly31
|
1
|
746
|
|
|
|
|
david cameron visits a highland primary school
(Preview)
DAVID CAMERON was visiting a Scottish primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked Mr.Cameron if he would like to lead the discussion on the word 'tragedy'. So the illustrious leader asked the class for...
|
Cowboy7307
|
2
|
1883
|
|
|
|
|
When it Started
(Preview)
A couple of these have been on b4 , a couple of goodies tho.One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fi...
|
Zoomtopz
|
0
|
826
|
|
|
|
|
MY NEXT LIFE ;
(Preview)
|
justcruisin01
|
2
|
750
|
|
|
|
|
THE BUS RIDE
(Preview)
A lady about eight months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately move to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, She complained to the driv...
|
goinsoon
|
1
|
807
|
|
|
|
|
the dress
(Preview)
A woman stopped by, unannounced, at her son's house. She knocked on the door, then immediately walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing, and the aroma of perfume filled the room. 'What are you doing?' she asked. 'I'm waiting for Ju...
|
Cowboy7307
|
1
|
662
|
|
|
