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Golf In Ireland...
(Preview)
On a golf tour in Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his Mercedes into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside. The pump attendant who knows absolutely nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is. "Top of the mornin' toye...
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Vic41
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0
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635
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Fish Cake
(Preview)
A bloke enters a fish and chip shop carrying a goldfish bowl. He asks the assistant, "Do you make fishcakes?" The assistant replies, "Yes, of course we do." The guy then asks, "Can you make one for my goldfish? It's his birthday next week.".
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rockylizard
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0
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603
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Irish Lubricant....
(Preview)
Murphy's' old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come. He brought her to the doctor and the doctor began to deliver the baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Murphy and said.'Hey, Murphy! You just had you a son,! 'Ain't dat grand, !!'Murphy got excited by this, b...
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Vic41
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0
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762
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shoplifting at a grocery store.
(Preview)
A very cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a grocery store. She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager to the security guard to the arresting officer who took her away, complaining and criticizing throughout the process.When she appeared before the judge, at her arraignmen...
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gerard gue
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1
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1154
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Men V's Women
(Preview)
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Gunsondeck
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1
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813
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Is sex work??
(Preview)
An RAF Group Captain was about to start the morning briefing to his staff. While waiting for the coffee machine to finish its brewing, the Group Captain decided to pose a question to all assembled. He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of so...
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Yendorane
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0
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721
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A Pun or two
(Preview)
When I'm feeling tired at work, I just use my smart phone to download a nap. In the petting zoo I saw a sheep scratching itself. Turns out it had fleece.
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Peterpan
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0
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597
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IRISH VIRGINITY TEST
(Preview)
Paddy, One of the little people,is planning to marry, he is. he is. so he goes to visit the king of the little people and asks him how he could tell if his bride-to be is still a virgin The king says,"Aye Paddy,to be sure,all Irish humans use three things for what they call a do-it-yourself ...Virgin...
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Yendorane
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0
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787
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God's Email....
(Preview)
One day God was looking down at earth and saw all of the rascally behaviour that was going on... So He called His angels and sent one to earth for a time. When the angel returned, he told God, 'Yes, it is bad on earth; 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not. God thought for a moment and said, 'Maybe I had bette...
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Vic41
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1
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749
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Military Warning to Australia From Pakistan....
(Preview)
Military Warning to Australia From Pakistan....This morning, the Pakistan Minister of Immigration, Mohammed Omar Upperkhan, warned Australia to cease all military activities in Afghanistan. He stated that if it does not stop immediately, Pakistan authorities will cut off Austr...
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rosco532
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1
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1267
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Ain't it GREAT gettin' "mature"
(Preview)
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rockylizard
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0
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675
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The Duck
(Preview)
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away. "The distressed woma...
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Hendo
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0
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808
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Irish Sausages
(Preview)
Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro. Murphy said 'Hang on, I have an idea.' He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage. Shamus said 'Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money...
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Yendorane
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0
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720
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Blow Dryer Mishap:
(Preview)
A good lesson Bob's wife caught him blow-drying his pecker this morning and asked him what the hell he was doing? Apparently, "heating up your breakfast" was not the right answer
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Yendorane
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1
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755
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Important Medical Info!
(Preview)
MEDICAL UPDATE Remember this the next time you have major surgery and needa blood transfusion! This is good to know. MEDICAL ALERT Australian Medical Association researchers have found that patients needing blood transfusions may benefit from receiving chicken...
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gerard gue
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0
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738
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LION TAMER;
(Preview)
A circus owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two people show up. One is a good looking, older retired golfer in his late sixties and the other is a gorgeous blond in her mid-twenties. The circus owner tells them, "I'm not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you...
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justcruisin01
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0
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697
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GOOD ADVISE;
(Preview)
ALWAYS WONDERED !!!!!!! DO NOT wash your hair in the shower!! It's so good to finally get a health warning that is useful!!! IT INVOLVES THE SHAMPOO RUNNING DOWN YOUR BODY WHEN YOU SHOWER WITH IT. WARNING TO US ALL!!! Shampoo Warning! I don't know WHY I didn't figure this out sooner! I use shampoo in th...
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justcruisin01
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0
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674
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THE BUTTOCKS;
(Preview)
The ButtocksA married couple was in a terrible accident where theMan's face was severely burned. The doctor told theHusband that they couldn't graft any skin from his bodyBecause he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donateSome of her own skin. However, the only skin on her bodyThat the doctor f...
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justcruisin01
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0
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760
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ARE YOU KATHLICK?
(Preview)
THREE LITTLE BOYS were concerned because they couldn't get anyone to play with them. They decided it was because they had not been baptized and didn't go to Sunday school. So they we...
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justcruisin01
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0
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858
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A qQuandry
(Preview)
Please spare a thought for the man who told his wife he was going on a business trip to China on that Malaysian Airlines Flight No MH. 370, and now can't come out of his girlfriend's flat.
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aussie_paul
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0
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634
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