Just Joking

rgren2 · rgren2

1. I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now!2. I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.3. I decided to stop calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.4. Last year I joined a...

rgren2 · rgren2

SomeGreat Sex Quotes!"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz SL500." - Lynn Lavner "It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married." - George Burns "Women might be able to fake...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Yarra · Yarra

On the last day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher.The supermarket manager's daughter brought the teacher basket of assorted fruit.The florist's son brought the teacher a bouquet of flowers.The Sweet Shop owner's daughter gave the teacher a pretty box of assorted sweets.Th...

Yarra · Yarra

A woman and her twelve-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit.It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings."Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women doing?""They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied.The taxi driver turns around and says, "Ge...

Yarra · Yarra

A blonde teenager, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a "handy-woman"She started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do."Well, I guess I could use som...

rgren2 · rgren2

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's and shyly walked uptothe woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for mywife.""What type of bra?" asked the clerk." Type?" inquires the man, "There's more than one type?"Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in e...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Yarra · Yarra

A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by a young woman with three small children running around at her feet.He said, "I'm doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the product?"She said, "Yes. My husband and I use it all the time.""If you don't mind me asking, what do yo...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Hendo · Hendo

Hillary Clinton decides to send Donald Trump a letter to let him know how she feels about him. Trump opens the letter and it appears to contain a single- line coded message: 370HSSV 0773H. Trump, not for the first time, is now completely baffled so he e-mails it to Melania Trump (his current wi...

kiwijims · kiwijims

An oldie but a goodie....................Aussie Computer Terminology - Getting ready for Broadband in the bush!! A little bit of Aussie culcha. LOGON: Adding wood to make the barbie hotter.LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the barbie.MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie.DOWNLOAD: Get...

Yarra · Yarra

The phone rings, a woman answers, "Hello".A pervert, with heavy breathing, says, "I bet you have a tight butt with no hair!"The woman replies, "Yes I do, he's watching golf - who shall I say is calling?"

Woody2 · Woody2

An elderly man walks into a confessional. The following conversation ensues: Man: 'I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitch-hiking. We went to a motel, where I had sex with each o...

Woody2 · Woody2

There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, 'Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. ' The priest said, 'Confess your sins and be forgiven.' The young woman said, 'Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times.' The prie...

Woody2 · Woody2

Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, 'Father, my dog is dead. Could ya' be saying' a mass for the poor creature?'Father Patrick replied, 'I'm afraid not; we cannot have services for an ani...

Woody2 · Woody2

An Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, 'I almost had an affair with a woman. The priest said, 'What do you mean, almost?' The Irishman said, 'Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped. The priest said, 'Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're no...

Yarra · Yarra

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight, live longer than the men who mention it.

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Musings (Preview) 1. I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now!2. I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.3. I decided to stop calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.4. Last year I joined a...	rgren2	0	1061	08:32 PM Aug 28, 2016 by rgren2
	Great sex quotes (Preview) SomeGreat Sex Quotes!"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz SL500." - Lynn Lavner "It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married." - George Burns "Women might be able to fake...	rgren2	0	938	08:29 PM Aug 28, 2016 by rgren2
	Evolution of the dinosaur (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	814	11:15 AM Aug 28, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	Last school day (Preview) On the last day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher.The supermarket manager's daughter brought the teacher basket of assorted fruit.The florist's son brought the teacher a bouquet of flowers.The Sweet Shop owner's daughter gave the teacher a pretty box of assorted sweets.Th...	Yarra	1	1053	07:54 PM Aug 27, 2016 by Cruising Cruze
	Taxi! (Preview) A woman and her twelve-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit.It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings."Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women doing?""They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied.The taxi driver turns around and says, "Ge...	Yarra	0	1038	10:59 AM Aug 27, 2016 by Yarra
	Another Blond Joke (Preview) A blonde teenager, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a "handy-woman"She started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do."Well, I guess I could use som...	Yarra	0	837	10:54 AM Aug 27, 2016 by Yarra
	Support. (Preview) A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's and shyly walked uptothe woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for mywife.""What type of bra?" asked the clerk." Type?" inquires the man, "There's more than one type?"Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in e...	rgren2	0	930	08:40 PM Aug 26, 2016 by rgren2
	Sail boat fuel (Preview)	Woody n Sue	1	1126	04:24 PM Aug 25, 2016 by Craig1
	A man doing market research knocked on a door (Preview) A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by a young woman with three small children running around at her feet.He said, "I'm doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the product?"She said, "Yes. My husband and I use it all the time.""If you don't mind me asking, what do yo...	Yarra	3	1231	10:59 PM Aug 24, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
	Sports commentators (Preview)	Woody n Sue	5	1158	08:54 PM Aug 24, 2016 by Baggie
	Trump (Preview) Hillary Clinton decides to send Donald Trump a letter to let him know how she feels about him. Trump opens the letter and it appears to contain a single- line coded message: 370HSSV 0773H. Trump, not for the first time, is now completely baffled so he e-mails it to Melania Trump (his current wi...	Hendo	3	991	08:49 PM Aug 24, 2016 by Baggie
	Broadband in the Bush (Preview) An oldie but a goodie....................Aussie Computer Terminology - Getting ready for Broadband in the bush!! A little bit of Aussie culcha. LOGON: Adding wood to make the barbie hotter.LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the barbie.MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie.DOWNLOAD: Get...	kiwijims	0	956	01:37 AM Aug 24, 2016 by kiwijims
	Obscene Phone Call (Preview) The phone rings, a woman answers, "Hello".A pervert, with heavy breathing, says, "I bet you have a tight butt with no hair!"The woman replies, "Yes I do, he's watching golf - who shall I say is calling?"	Yarra	0	987	09:01 AM Aug 23, 2016 by Yarra
	92 yrs old (Preview) An elderly man walks into a confessional. The following conversation ensues: Man: 'I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitch-hiking. We went to a motel, where I had sex with each o...	Woody2	0	1038	05:54 PM Aug 22, 2016 by Woody2
	Forgive me ,father (Preview) There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, 'Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. ' The priest said, 'Confess your sins and be forgiven.' The young woman said, 'Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times.' The prie...	Woody2	0	1026	05:51 PM Aug 22, 2016 by Woody2
	Irish no 2 (Preview) Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, 'Father, my dog is dead. Could ya' be saying' a mass for the poor creature?'Father Patrick replied, 'I'm afraid not; we cannot have services for an ani...	Woody2	0	991	05:46 PM Aug 22, 2016 by Woody2
	Irish no1 (Preview) An Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, 'I almost had an affair with a woman. The priest said, 'What do you mean, almost?' The Irishman said, 'Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped. The priest said, 'Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're no...	Woody2	0	964	05:42 PM Aug 22, 2016 by Woody2
	A lesson for men (Preview) A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight, live longer than the men who mention it.	Yarra	0	961	03:24 PM Aug 22, 2016 by Yarra
	Beryl's marriage problem (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	1072	09:49 PM Aug 20, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	A woman spots an attractive man at a party (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	979	08:07 PM Aug 20, 2016 by Woody n Sue
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