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Accident Reporting
(Preview)
Please complete the forms fully
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Wombat 280
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1
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830
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Teaching Maths
(Preview)
1. Teaching Maths In 1950s A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production Is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit? 2. Teaching Maths In 1970s A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production Is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit? 3. Teac...
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Delta18
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0
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961
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Wheel of life
(Preview)
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Wombat 280
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0
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833
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National Orgasm Day
(Preview)
He turned to his wife in bed and whispered, " Did you know it`s National Orgasm Day?" " Oh what a pity," she smiler, " Right in the middle of National Headache Week!!!!!"
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Phillipn
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0
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943
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Cardoilogist Funeral
(Preview)
This would be an acceptable reason to laugh at a funeral. A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital where he worked for most of his life. A huge heart...... covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the hospi...
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Phillipn
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0
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821
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OLD Van Parks
(Preview)
When I arrived at the van park I'm sure I was the only one plug into that pole
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Wombat 280
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0
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833
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Morris & Esther
(Preview)
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Esther, I'd really like to ride in that helicopter.'Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars' One year Esther and Morris went to t...
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gregroz
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0
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739
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That's How The Fight Started
(Preview)
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift... The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started..... My wife and I were watching Who Want...
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Yarra
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1
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876
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10 Science Jokes for Nerds
(Preview)
1. Im reading a great book on anti-gravity. I cant put it down. 2. I have a new theory on inertia but it doesnt seem to be gaining momentum. 3. Why cant atheists solve exponential equations? Because they dont believe in higher powers. 4. Schrodingers cat walks into a bar. And doesnt. 5. Do you know the nam...
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Possum3
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4
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950
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Wrong Number
(Preview)
"Hello?", "Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mummy near the phone?" "No Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul." After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul." "Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mum...
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Yarra
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0
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790
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History with a smile
(Preview)
Poem by Willie Nelson The younger generation may not know it but at one time Willie Nelson was songwriter of the year. Such songs as "Hello Wall", "Crazy" sung by Patsy Cline ,"Funny how Time Slips Away" and a host of other favorites. He is also a well recogniz...
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Young Simmo
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3
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930
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Only people from Yorkshire will understand. (some too bloody hard for my old brain)
(Preview)
The man from Barnsley 1) A Barnsley man goes to the vet: Man : Can yer stopme cat weein all rahnd thouse? Vet: Is it a Tom? Man : Nor, its in tbasket. 18 caret 2) A Yorkshiremans dog dies and and as it was his favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by. Yorkshirema...
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Possum3
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0
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879
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IF THIS DOESN’T MAKE YOU SMILE, CALL A DOCTOR !
(Preview)
1 minute 3 seconds of delight, Enjoyhttps://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/vnVuqfXohxc?rel=0&%3bshowinfo=0K.J.
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kiwijims
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0
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880
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Protocol
(Preview)
An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentin...ean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guate...
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Possum3
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1
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745
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A mature lady gets pulled over for speeding...........
(Preview)
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Traffic Cop: Yes ma'ma, I'm afraid you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Traffic Cop: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one. Traffic Cop: Don't have one? Older Woman: No. I lo...
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June
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8
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1256
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OK, Take your pick.
(Preview)
I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject t o blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have...
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Young Simmo
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0
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902
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Beware of that Underwear Dust.......
(Preview)
One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in 'Slim Fast'. Maybe it would take a few inches off your butt!' His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded. The next morning the husba...
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June
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2
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860
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SORRY if this brakes the rules, but I am not a Golpher.
(Preview)
A man playing on a new golf course got confused as to what hole he was on. He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing. She replied, "I'm on the 7th hole, and you're a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole." He thanked her and went back to...
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Young Simmo
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1
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910
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Politics
(Preview)
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's c...all me capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care o...
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Possum3
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0
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696
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Irish Baptism
(Preview)
An Irishman is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds into the water, subsequently bumping into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon, he asks the drunk, "...
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Spydermann
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2
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1036
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