Just Joking

goldfinger · goldfinger

..From the Olympic website: Did you know this, I didn't........ 2500 years ago a slave call-girl from Sardinia named Gaedophamee ..pronounced 'Get-offa'-me, was attending a great athletic festival in Greece. This Festival had no name at that time... In those days the athletes performed naked....

goldfinger · goldfinger

,Men are uncomplicated creatures, and by nature happier...... Our last name stays put... The garage is all ours.... Car mechanics tell us the truth... Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.... The same hairstyle lasts for years....even d...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

A manager is in a pickle.He was told he must lay off one person from his staff.Jack Butler and Helen Doyle are the lowest seniority people and have the least experience, but they are so equal in performance, attendance, and potential, that he cant choose.So he decides to watch them both, and the first o...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

A Woman Wanted To Get A Dog For Protection. What Happened When She Got It Is Priceless.February 19, 20161My sister-in-law, a truck driver, had decided to get a dog for protection.As she inspected a likely candidate, the trainer told her, He doesnt like men.Perfect, my sister-in-law thought, an...

Wombat 280 · Wombat 280

Hi Everyone. A mate of mine has got a ticket for Wales v England in France next month. The problem is, when he applied for the ticket he wasn't aware of the date and unfortunately it falls on his bloody wedding day, so he wants to know if anyone is interested in getting married?

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

A married couple takes their son to the circus.After a while the father gets up to get some popcorn.While he is away the little boy notices something hanging down between the elephants legs.Mommy, what is that hanging down on the elephant? he asks.The embarrassed mother says Oh, thats nothing honey...

Palebushman · Palebushman

If Hilary Clinton wins the U.S. presidential election, it will be the first time in history that two U.S. presidents have slept with each other! If Donald Trump wins the U.S. presidential election, it will be the first time in history that a billionaire moves into public housing vacated by a bla...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

A young woman goes to her doctor's office, afraid of the strange development on the inside of her thighs . . a green spot on the inside of each. "They won't wash off, they won't scrape off and they seem to be getting worse." The doctor assures her he'll get to the bottom of the problem, and tells her not to w...

rgren2 · rgren2

Bill Shorten was asleep in his house and awoke to see Menzies' ghost. He asked, "Bob, how can I make this country better?" Sir Robert said, "Love the Japanese steel producers like I did." Shorten went back to sleep, this time he woke to an image of John Howard at the end of his bed. He asked, John, how can I m...

Aus-Kiwi · Aus-Kiwi

Woody2 · Woody2

- Bubba had shingles. Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate this! Doesn't it seem more and more that physicians are running their practices like an assembly line? Here's what happened to Bubba: Bubba walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked h...

Woody2 · Woody2

DAUGHTER TEXTS DAD ON MODERN MARRIAGE WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT"Daddy, I am coming home to get married, soon. Get out your check book.LOL. I'm in love with a boy who is far away from me. I am in Australia and he lives in Scotland. We met on a dating website, became friends on Facebook, had long chats on What...

Cupie · Cupie

Hi .. This old clip is where I clipped my Avatar from. It always gives me a laugh

jimfox · jimfox

So the blonde thought she was now smart enough to feed herself, so she got dressed, walked down the street & into the local library. She walked up to the counter & announced in a loud voice, " I'll have a Big Mac, Coke & Fries thanks. " The librarian glared at her & whispered forcefully, "...

Yarra · Yarra

A man told his doctor he wasnt able to do all the things around the house like he used to.When the examination was complete, he said:Now Doc, tell me in plain English what is wrong with me.Well in plain English, the doctor replied, youre just lazy.Okay, said the man.Now give me the medical term so I can te...

Yarra · Yarra

They sometimes shipped empty boxes without the tube inside. This challenged their perceived quality with the buyers and distributors. Understanding how important the relationship with them was, the CEO of the company assembled his top people. They decided to hire an external engineering compa...

Yarra · Yarra

On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven.While waiting, they began to wonder if they could possibly get married in Heaven.When St. Peter ar...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking.My ...wife walked by and asked me what I was doing, and I said 'nothing'.The reason I said 'nothing' instead of saying 'just thinking' is because she...

Yarra · Yarra

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul.

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	....now I did not know this...why the Olympics are so named.. (Preview) ..From the Olympic website: Did you know this, I didn't........ 2500 years ago a slave call-girl from Sardinia named Gaedophamee ..pronounced 'Get-offa'-me, was attending a great athletic festival in Greece. This Festival had no name at that time... In those days the athletes performed naked....	goldfinger	0	881	01:19 PM Jun 18, 2016 by goldfinger
	Men are uncomplicated creatures, and by nature happier.....tongue slightly in cheek.. (Preview) ,Men are uncomplicated creatures, and by nature happier...... Our last name stays put... The garage is all ours.... Car mechanics tell us the truth... Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.... The same hairstyle lasts for years....even d...	goldfinger	0	943	01:05 PM Jun 18, 2016 by goldfinger
	One employee has to go (Preview) A manager is in a pickle.He was told he must lay off one person from his staff.Jack Butler and Helen Doyle are the lowest seniority people and have the least experience, but they are so equal in performance, attendance, and potential, that he cant choose.So he decides to watch them both, and the first o...	Woody n Sue	0	935	06:27 PM Jun 17, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	Guard dog (Preview) A Woman Wanted To Get A Dog For Protection. What Happened When She Got It Is Priceless.February 19, 20161My sister-in-law, a truck driver, had decided to get a dog for protection.As she inspected a likely candidate, the trainer told her, He doesnt like men.Perfect, my sister-in-law thought, an...	Woody n Sue	0	917	08:38 AM Jun 17, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	Footy Ticket (Preview) Hi Everyone. A mate of mine has got a ticket for Wales v England in France next month. The problem is, when he applied for the ticket he wasn't aware of the date and unfortunately it falls on his bloody wedding day, so he wants to know if anyone is interested in getting married?	Wombat 280	0	828	08:06 PM Jun 16, 2016 by Wombat 280
	Circus elephant (Preview) A married couple takes their son to the circus.After a while the father gets up to get some popcorn.While he is away the little boy notices something hanging down between the elephants legs.Mommy, what is that hanging down on the elephant? he asks.The embarrassed mother says Oh, thats nothing honey...	Woody n Sue	0	801	08:03 PM Jun 16, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	Interesting factoids (Preview) If Hilary Clinton wins the U.S. presidential election, it will be the first time in history that two U.S. presidents have slept with each other! If Donald Trump wins the U.S. presidential election, it will be the first time in history that a billionaire moves into public housing vacated by a bla...	Palebushman	0	863	01:12 PM Jun 16, 2016 by Palebushman
	Irritations .. (Preview) A young woman goes to her doctor's office, afraid of the strange development on the inside of her thighs . . a green spot on the inside of each. "They won't wash off, they won't scrape off and they seem to be getting worse." The doctor assures her he'll get to the bottom of the problem, and tells her not to w...	Aus-Kiwi	0	1044	07:03 PM Jun 14, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
	Bill Shortonbrains. (Preview) Bill Shorten was asleep in his house and awoke to see Menzies' ghost. He asked, "Bob, how can I make this country better?" Sir Robert said, "Love the Japanese steel producers like I did." Shorten went back to sleep, this time he woke to an image of John Howard at the end of his bed. He asked, John, how can I m...	rgren2	2	1024	06:43 PM Jun 14, 2016 by aussie_paul
	Just learning. Aust outback fishing (Preview)	Aus-Kiwi	0	824	06:35 PM Jun 14, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
	Shingles (Preview) - *Bubba had shingles.* *Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate this! Doesn't it seem more and more that physicians are running their practices like an assembly line?* *Here's what happened to Bubba:* *Bubba walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked h...*	Woody2	0	1002	05:45 PM Jun 14, 2016 by Woody2
	Modern wedding (Preview) DAUGHTER TEXTS DAD ON MODERN MARRIAGE WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT"Daddy, I am coming home to get married, soon. Get out your check book.LOL. I'm in love with a boy who is far away from me. I am in Australia and he lives in Scotland. We met on a dating website, became friends on Facebook, had long chats on What...	Woody2	0	1005	05:43 PM Jun 14, 2016 by Woody2
	About my Avatar (Preview) Hi .. This old clip is where I clipped my Avatar from. It always gives me a laugh	Cupie	0	939	10:45 AM Jun 14, 2016 by Cupie
	The Blonde (Preview) So the blonde thought she was now smart enough to feed herself, so she got dressed, walked down the street & into the local library. She walked up to the counter & announced in a loud voice, " I'll have a Big Mac, Coke & Fries thanks. " The librarian glared at her & whispered forcefully, "...	jimfox	0	931	09:08 PM Jun 13, 2016 by jimfox
	A man told his doctor (Preview) A man told his doctor he wasnt able to do all the things around the house like he used to.When the examination was complete, he said:Now Doc, tell me in plain English what is wrong with me.Well in plain English, the doctor replied, youre just lazy.Okay, said the man.Now give me the medical term so I can te...	Yarra	0	926	10:04 AM Jun 13, 2016 by Yarra
	A toothpaste factory had a problem. (Preview) They sometimes shipped empty boxes without the tube inside. This challenged their perceived quality with the buyers and distributors. Understanding how important the relationship with them was, the CEO of the company assembled his top people. They decided to hire an external engineering compa...	Yarra	3	1421	06:22 AM Jun 12, 2016 by dorian
	St. Peter's Dilemma (Preview) On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven.While waiting, they began to wonder if they could possibly get married in Heaven.When St. Peter ar...	Yarra	0	901	08:14 PM Jun 10, 2016 by Yarra
	Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts? (Preview) I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking.My ...wife walked by and asked me what I was doing, and I said 'nothing'.The reason I said 'nothing' instead of saying 'just thinking' is because she...	aussie_paul	2	1185	01:40 PM Jun 9, 2016 by bandit11
	Got to get one of these for the front gate (Preview)	Yarra	2	1119	05:38 PM Jun 8, 2016 by aussie_paul
	Ha ha, lol (Preview) Aussie Paul.	aussie_paul	1	1033	04:00 PM Jun 8, 2016 by Baggie
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