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He tried..
(Preview)
AT LEAST HE TRIED!!!I was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching my wife who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off I asked what she'd like to have for her birthday.'I'd like to be eight again', she replied, still looking in the mirror.On the morning of her birthday, I ar...
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aussie_paul
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0
|
440
|
|
|
|
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Graveyard..
(Preview)
A drunk walking home decided to take a short cut through the cemetery,Walking along in the dark he stumbled over a mound of dirt and fell into an open grave that was dug for an early funeral the next day.The man tried to climb out, but he was short and the gravediggers had dug the correct six foot depth.The...
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aussie_paul
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0
|
465
|
|
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Deaf..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
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0
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369
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Heart transplant..
(Preview)
An old man needs a heart transplant and gets the call from his doctor one day that there are several options available for him.We have three possible donors, the doctor explains.One is a young, healthy athlete.The second is a middle-aged businessman who never drank or smoked and the third is an attor...
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aussie_paul
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0
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394
|
|
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|
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Ohh
(Preview)
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rgren2
|
1
|
785
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Santa
(Preview)
Dear Santa, I'm writing to tell you I've been naughty and it was worth it. You fat, judgemental bastard.
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Aussie1
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2
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578
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Drinking whiskey
(Preview)
I was drinking whiskey, and the bartender screamed "does anyone know CPR ??? I yelled "I know the entire alphabet" We all laughed and laughed well, except for this one guy.
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Aussie1
|
1
|
551
|
|
|
|
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apology
(Preview)
I would like to apologise to anyone I have not yet offended, I will get to you eventually.
|
Aussie1
|
0
|
503
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lol..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
|
0
|
492
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lol..
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
|
0
|
560
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|
|
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Police at door..
(Preview)
Police at door.Just had two police officers at my front door.They asked me, Are you familiar with the letters HB?I said, No, Im not.How about LS? they asked.I replied, No. then they asked, What about JD?I said, Hang on a minute, am I a suspect or something?They said, No, these are just initial inquirie...
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aussie_paul
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0
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535
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The twelve days of Christmas
(Preview)
On the first day of Christmas my true love said to me;I=m glad we bought a turkey and a Christmas tree On the second day of Christmas, much laughter could be heard,as we tucked into the turkey - a most delicious bird On the third day we entertained the people next door;The turkey tasted just as good as i...
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erad
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1
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678
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Take it easy on the roads.
(Preview)
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67HR
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1
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674
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Kinfolk.
(Preview)
Two good ol' boys in a Arkansas trailer park were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer after getting off work at the local horse trailer manufa...cturing plant:After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd....."If'n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday and make love to your wife whi...
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aussie_paul
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0
|
494
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|
|
|
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Kinfolk.
(Preview)
Two good ol' boys in a Arkansas trailer park were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer after getting off work at the local horse trailer manufa...cturing plant:After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd....."If'n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday and make love to your wife whi...
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aussie_paul
|
0
|
392
|
|
|
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Dear Santa.
(Preview)
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rgren2
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0
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554
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Advice
(Preview)
To anybody I offended this year. Work on yourself so I don't gotta do it again in 2025
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Aussie1
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2
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882
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Dolly Parton
(Preview)
Dolly Parton hasnt spoken to her bra fitter since the two fell out!
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67HR
|
0
|
549
|
|
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An old guy..
(Preview)
An old guy was working out at the gym when he spotted a young hot girl walking in.He asked the trainer standing next to him, "What machine should I use to impress that girl over there?"The trainer looked him up and down and said;"I would recommend the ATM in the lobby."
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aussie_paul
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0
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559
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|
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The Rectum Stretcher
(Preview)
The Rectum StretcherA woman in Ireland driving along at speed passed over a bridge only to find a policeman with a radar gun lying in wait.The policeman pulled her over, walked up to the car, with a patronising smirk and asked, "What's your hurry?"She replied, "I'm late for work.""Oh yeah," said the p...
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aussie_paul
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0
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468
|
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