Bloke thinks his missus is playing up so he hires a Chinese detective to follow her. The guy reports back the next day.

'What happened?'

' Wife go into house, me watch. Me see light come on upstairs, me climb tree me watch'. Me see man strip off, me watch. Me see wife strip off, me watch. He play with she, she play with he, me play with me. Me fall from tree, me no see anymore.