As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees a $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: Five lamb chops, please.
Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dogs mouth, and quickly closes the shop. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop.
The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus. The butcher follows, dumbstruck.
As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the Stop bell, then the butcher follows him off.
The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the step. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself against the door. *Whap!*
He does this again and again. No answer. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door.
A big guy opens it and starts cursing and shouting at the dog.
The butcher runs up and screams at the guy, What the hell are you doing? This dogs a genius!
The owner responds, Genius, my butt
Its the second time this week hes forgotten his keys!
-- Edited by Possum3 on Monday 15th of November 2021 05:19:35 PM
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Possum; AKA:- Ali El-Aziz Mohamed Gundawiathan
Sent from my imperial66 typewriter using carrier pigeon, message sticks and smoke signals.
A bloke walks into a bar and notices, sitting in the corner, a man and a dog at a table playing chess. As he watches the dog nudges it's queen forward two squares and barks, "Hmmm", said the man he's playing "Check eh?".
The bloke watching is astonished! He walks over to the table and says to the man "I have never, ever heard of a dog that could play chess. That dog is absolutely and totally amazing!"
The man replies "He's not so clever... he's lost two games already."
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"I beseech you in the bowels of Christ think it possible you may be mistaken"
Oliver Cromwell, 3rd August 1650 - in a letter to the General Assembly of the Kirk of Scotland