A young boy was walking along the docks one day admiring the ships, when a man walked up behind him and said, Thinking of becoming a sailor?

Yes, I am! replied the boy. Well, the man said, I have sailed many years and have had many adventures.

The boy looked the man up and down, and saw that he had an eye patch, a peg leg, and a hook.

I would love to hear of your adventures, said the boy.

Well, the man said, I was sailing around the Cape of Good Hope when I encountered pirates.

They boarded my boat and I fought them 'til there was only one left. But before he got away he cut off my leg!

That sounds terrible! exclaimed the boy. Aye lad, it was, but I got over it and continued sailing the seas.

How did you get the hook? inquired the boy. I was once again sailing around the Cape of Good Hope on my way home when I encountered the same pirate with a whole new crew.

They boarded me again and I fought down to the last man, only this time as he got away, he cut of my hand!

That is awful! the boy once again exclaimed. Aye lad, but again I got over it and continued sailing the seas.

Tell me how you got the eye patch! Was it the pirates again?

No lad, this time I was just out finishing one day, I heard the cry of a gull, and when I looked up it sh*t in me eye!

Pardon me sir, but I didnt know you could lose an eye from gull sh*t.

Well lad, 'twas the first day with the hook!!!