Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:... I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. But then I think, since Im going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my cheque book off the table, and see that there is only one cheque left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi Id been drinking. Im going to look for my cheques, but first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I dont accidentally knock it over. The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eyethey need water. I put the Pepsi on the counter and discover my reading glasses that Ive been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first Im going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, Ill be looking for the remote, but I wont remember that its on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first Ill water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do. At the end of the day: the car isnt washed the bills arent paid there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter the flowers dont have enough water, there is still only 1 cheque in my cheque book, I cant find the remote, I cant find my glasses, and I dont remember what I did with the car keys. Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, Im really baffled because I know I was busy all the damn day, and Im really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and Ill try to get some help for it, but first Ill check my e-mail. Do me a favour, Forward this message to everyone you know, because I dont remember who the hell Ive sent it to. Dont laugh if this isnt you yet, your day is coming
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Possum; AKA:- Ali El-Aziz Mohamed Gundawiathan
Sent from my imperial66 typewriter using carrier pigeon, message sticks and smoke signals.