After having their 11th child, a Scouse couple decided that was enough,
as they could not afford a larger bed.
So the husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife
didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would fix the problem but it was expensive....
A less costly alternative was to go home, get a big firework, light it,
put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.
The Scouser said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest guy in the
world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my
ear is going to help me."
"Trust me, it will do the job", said the doctor.
So the man went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can.
He held the can up to his ear and began to count: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5," at
which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs so he could continue counting on his other hand.
This procedure also works in Birmingham, parts of Essex, inner London..