The judge says to a double murder defendant, " Your'e charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer".

A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard!"

The judge says, "You are also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with a hammer."

The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, " You ROTTEN bastard!"

The judge stops and says Paddy in the back of the courtroom. "Sir i can understand your anger and frustration at these crimes, but no more outbursts from you, or i'll charge you with contempt, is that understood?"

Paddy stands up and says, " I'm sorry, Your Honour, but for fifteen years i've lived next door to that arsehole, and every time i asked if i could borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one"