For those who do not listen to the 'Today' programme on BBC Radio 4, this is English humour at its best.

Right at the end of a programme recently, there was a discussion about the
cost of entry into Premiership football matches where ticket prices of £60
or £100 per game is not uncommon.

An elderly chap being interviewed said he could recall many years ago
arriving at the turnstiles when the attendant greeted him with: "That will
be ten quid, mate".

"What?!" the old chap said, "I could get a woman for that!"

Without batting an eyelid, the fellow on the turnstile retorted, "Not for 45
minutes each way with a brass band and a meat pie in the interval, you wouldn't!?