John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said,
"Here's to spending the rest o' me life,
between the legs o' me wife !"
 
That won him the top prize at the pub for the best
toast of the night !
 
He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the
prize for the Best toast of The night."
 
She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?"
John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life,
sitting in church beside me wife."
 
"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.
 
The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking
buddies on the street Corner. The man chuckled
leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other
night at The pub with a toast about you, Mary."
 
She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit
surprised myself. You know, he's only been in
there twice in the last four years. "Once I had to pull him by
the ears to make him come, and the other time he fell
asleep".