Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40.

 

ITS A BOY," I shouted, "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY!"

And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai brothel!

 

In the first few days of the Olympics the Romanians took gold, silver, bronze, copper & lead.

 

Sailing results are in. GB took gold, USA took silver and Somalia took a middle aged couple from Weymouth.

 

An Englishman has started his own business in Afghanistan. He is making land mines that look like prayer mats.

Its doing well. Prophets are going through the roof!!

 

Japanese scientists have created a camera with a shutter speed so fast, they can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

 

A boy asks his granny, 'Have you seen my pills? They were labelled LSD.' Granny replies, 'f@@k the pills; have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?'

 

Wife gets naked and asks hubby, 'What turns you on more: my pretty face or my sexy body?' Hubby looks her up and down and replies, 'Your sense of humour!

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