Answering machine  message,

"I am not available right  now,

But thank you for caring enough to  call.

I am making some changes in my  life.

Please leave a message after the  beep.

If I do not return your  call,

you are one of the  changes."

~~~~~

My wife and I had  words,

but I didn't get to use  mine.

~~~~~

Frustration is trying to find your  glasses

without your  glasses.

~~~~~

Blessed are those who  can

give without  remembering

and take without  forgetting.

~~~~~

The irony of life is  that,

by the time you're old  enough

to know your way  around,

you're not going  anywhere.

~~~~~

God made man before  woman

so as to give him  time

to think of an  answer

for her first  question.

~~~~~

I was always taught to respect my  elders,

but it keeps getting harder to find  one.

~~~~~

Every morning is the dawn of a new  error.