check out the new remote control Jockey Wheel SmartBar Topargee products Enginesaver Low Water Alarms
Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Click here for the Grey Nomads website -> The Grey Nomads Forum -> Just Joking -> GOD SAID TO ADAM
Post Info TOPIC: GOD SAID TO ADAM
sarg


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1013
Date:
GOD SAID TO ADAM
Permalink  

God said,

"Adam, I want you to do something for Me."


Adam said,
"Gladly, Lord, what do you want me to do?"


God said,
"Go down into that valley."

Adam said,
"What's a valley?"

God explained it to him.
Then God said,
"Cross the river."

Adam said,
"What's a river?"

God explained that
to him, and then said,
"Go over to the hill...."

Adam said,
"What is a hill?"

So, God explained to Adam what a hill was.
He told Adam,
"On the other side of the hill you will find a cave."

Adam said,
"What's a cave?"

After God explained,
He said, "In the cave you will find a woman."

Adam said,
"What's a woman?"

So God explained
that to him, too.
Then, God said,
"I want you to
reproduce."

Adam said,
"How do I do that?"

God first said (under his breath), "Geez....."

And then,
just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well.

So, Adam goes down into the valley,
across the river, and
over the hill, into the cave, and finds the woman.

Then, in
about five minutes, he was back.

God, his patience
wearing thin,
said angrily,
"What is it now?"

And Adam said....

*

*


(YOU'RE GOING TO
LOVE THIS !!!!!!)

*

*

*
"What's a headache?" biggrinbiggrinbiggrin



__________________

       

                          A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

MA247


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 31
Date:
Permalink  

Very funny sarg

__________________

They say marriages are made in heaven, so is thunder and lightning
Ontos45


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 812
Date:
Permalink  

Waiting for the knockers mate (the political correctors)


Peter

__________________

Cheers Peter and Sue

"If I agree with you we'll both be wrong"

No, I'm not busy, I did it right the first time.

Self-powered wheelie walker, soon a power chair (ex. Nomad)
sarg


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1013
Date:
Permalink  

biggrin  Ha Ha ...Good one Peter. Just goes to show that God was a woman, cause He  confuse  eerrrr  confuse   She knows what a Headache is  biggrinbiggrinbiggrin

This might get e'm in Peter  no



__________________

       

                          A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

MA247


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 31
Date:
Permalink  

You now what happened to me when I told a female joke ( just joking) a huge 510 views 13 replies ......

__________________

They say marriages are made in heaven, so is thunder and lightning
sarg


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1013
Date:
Permalink  

It depends on how funny we blokes think the joke is ....compared to how funny the women (or some of them) think the joke is.... multiplied by one hundred ...divided by fifteen....subtract twenty one....come back to the first number you first thought of and you finish up with the funnyishness
That is the formula that is most commonly used in the Southern hemisphere, so I was told by my old uncle in Siberia. He was not a very funny man, so my Aunty told me...( she lives on the Gold Coast)........biggrinbiggrinbiggrin



__________________

       

                          A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

dorian


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 4188
Date:
Permalink  

One day, after a near eternity in the Garden of Eden, Adam calls out to God: "Lord, I have a problem."

"What's the problem, Adam?", God replies.

"Lord, I know you created me and have provided for me and surrounded me with this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I'm just not happy."

"Why is that, Adam?", comes the reply.

"Lord, I know you created this place for me, with all this lovely food and all of the beautiful animals, but I am lonely."

"Well Adam, in that case I have the perfect solution. I shall create a 'woman' for you."

"What's a 'woman', Lord?"

"This 'woman' will be the most intelligent, sensitive, caring, and beautiful creature I have ever created. She will be so intelligent that she can figure out what you want before you want it. She will be so sensitive and caring that she will know your every mood and how to make you happy. Her beauty will rival that of the heavens and earth. She will unquestioningly care for your every need and desire. She will be the perfect companion for you", replies the heavenly voice.

"Sounds great".

"She will be, but this is going to cost you, Adam".

"How much will this 'woman' cost me Lord?", Adam replies.

"She'll cost you your right arm, your right leg, an eye, an ear, and your left testicle."

Adam ponders this for some time, with a look of deep thought and concern on his face. Finally Adam says to God: "Ehhh, what can I get for a rib?"


__________________

"No friend ever served me, and no enemy ever wronged me, whom I have not repaid in full."

Lucius Cornelius Sulla - died 78 BC 

 
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
Click here for the Grey Nomads website -> The Grey Nomads Forum -> Just Joking -> GOD SAID TO ADAM
Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us
Purchase Grey Nomad bumper stickers Read our daily column, the Nomad News The Grey Nomad's Guidebook