Blokes who want to help solo females

Sheba · Guru

Blokes who want to help solo females

Beth54 · Guru

When I arrived here at Iluka, I'd driven a long way, I was hot and sticky and tired, so my reversing into my spot wasn't as good as usual. An old gent came along and said do 'this this and this & we'll just push it over'. What the? What it boiled down to was that I wasn't straight against the concrete slab, so he was saying to unhook and we'll push it over. I said 'I'm not pushing it',,'oh I'll help you' this went on for a bit, and I was REALLY getting annoyed with him, and his wife stepped in and said 'he thinks it needs to be at the edge of the concrete for the step, but it opens at the back doesn't it'. Yes, thank you! He's going 'oh oh oh', and I'm thinking 'just ping off'!

I bet he doesn't step in and tell a single bloke how to do it!

So I trust my fellow nomads of the male persuasion would ask if a lady needs help.

turbopete · Senior Member

dont be too hard on us mere males beth,,our intentions are mostly good,sometimes it dosen,t come out the way we mean it ,,,, sobsob sob sob bo hooo booo hoo

Beth54 · Guru

turbopete wrote:
dont be too hard on us mere males beth,,our intentions are mostly good,sometimes it dosen,t come out the way we mean it ,,,, sobsob sob sob bo hooo booo hoo

Oh poor didums, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. wink biggrin

biggles · Senior Member

Gee Beth .. all you gotta do is call .. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ..

Beth54 · Guru

biggles wrote:
Gee Beth .. all you gotta do is call .. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ..

...and I'll be there... wink

jetj · Guru

I recently ran into the ultimate damsel in distress, while camping. Announced she couldn't back and needed lots of help. A couple of ladies got their hubbies who couldn't do enough to help.

It's great that well meaning blokes will help when needed but not sure how you discourage them, when their help isn't required.

Beth54 · Guru

True Janette, without being rude. His wife was obviously reading me better than he was. hmm

Personally, I don't think a solo female should be doing this if they can't do the basics. Although, I must admit, I couldn't change a tyre these days. I know HOW to do it, I just don't have the strength in my hands anymore.

And I'm not the sort of person who would ask a stranger to help me.

I guess I'd have try and LOOK like a damsel in distress somehow, if I wasn't able to get RACQ.

Firefly · Guru

Beth is there some sort of an attachement you could use on a cordless drill to undo the wheel nuts mate, sorta like you see in the pitts at car races?

jimricho · Guru

Maybe you came across the caravan park's resident menace!

On a broader issue why is it that when husband and wife grey nomads are on the road one rarely ever sees the wife doing the driving, or backing on to the site with the husband guiding?

Sheba · Guru

Firefly wrote:
Beth is there some sort of an attachement you could use on a cordless drill to undo the wheel nuts mate, sorta like you see in the pitts at car races?

Have PM'd you re. an Impact Wrench Beth.

Cheers,

Sheba.

woody · Veteran Member

It's a simple as "would you like a hand?" easy to say no I'lll be right thanks mate
I am male have worked in van parks for the last 12 years, backed in many vans in tight places, but when travelling , still get the bloke that wants to tell you how to do it. It is hard to tell them to nick off without being rude. I guess those blokes will always want to tell people how to do it .(Whatever it may be ).

Gerty Dancer · Guru

The best teams of backer and guider I've seen are women drivers with male guiders... the Tow-ed bloke had a theory that is because women dont question male instructions. I'm still thinking that over confuse

As far as helpful males go, some are annoying when you dont want them but others can be angels when you do....

Beth hope you get a good sleep and feel better before travelling on. smile

jimricho · Guru

Sheba wrote:
jimricho wrote:
On a broader issue why is it that when husband and wife grey nomads are on the road one rarely ever sees the wife doing the driving, or backing on to the site with the husband guiding?
That's easy jimricho. Their husbands won't let them. Male ego's coming to the fore.
Cheers,
Sheba.

-- Edited by Sheba on Monday 3rd of December 2012 06:42:09 PM

I suspect that in many cases you may well be right, which is a pity, but I suspect self confidence (or lack thereof) may also be a factor. I've yet to meet a woman who can't do a serious job of deflating a male ego! biggrin wink

Beth54 · Guru

I do hope turbopete hasn't taken offence at my dig. confuse I expected a comeback, all in good sport of course. biggrin

You're right GD..My sister & brother-in-law do that with the hook up, but he does the parking, with her guiding, but it's not always successful. He seems to get frustrated. hmm I actually feel she'd do a better job of that too. wink She's a better driver all round actually. biggrin

Early in our trip they guided me to a degree, then a little further along they just watched, and finally they just let me do my thing.

I've certainly made mistakes along the way, and I'll probably make more, but I'm a lot less worried about it all now. Particularly the 'mountain climbing'. Lucy has done very well.

Frog53 · Veteran Member

Please don't be to hard on us old blokes please Beth, we are the generation that still like to treat damsels in distress, not saying that you were in distress, but my dear old mum use to say that if you didn't help a lady I'll clip your ears. Now in saying that I will only help someone park if they ask for my help, because I have been abused by both young and old, male and lady's. I have driven semi's and buses and it helps but there is also lady's out there doing the same thing even driving road trains, so my point is just as you said Beth If we need help we will ask for it, but I am still worrying about that clip under the ears. And like you Beth I don't think I would be able to change a flat on my vehicle or van either because of my arthritis but that doesn't keep us from travelling. So don't be upset about your experience do just what you are doing enjoying life.

Regards,

David

Frogs on the Hop

Beth54 · Guru

Very true David. I did realise it's the generation thing. And I was tired and cranky at the time, but now I just chalk it up as another story to tell. biggrin

Frog53 · Veteran Member

Once again Beth so true, ladies are allowed to be

beiffe · Guru

We are all different and yes we were taught to respect and help the fairer sex, but now days even if you hold a door open it can cause a very rude rebuff so we have to learn that not all ladies expect, appreciate or want help from a mere male.

I have had my head bitten off for holding a door open, something to do with she had the strength to open the door and didn't need me to do it. Many do appreciate, but we just have to be more careful and usually now I only do the male bit for a lady I know and even though I feel this is not right it is safer.

I had a expert caravan attendant (Male) who wanted me to let him back my old van in to a site. Said he could do it better and easier. I ask where do you want the bloody wheels. He said as close as you can to that peg on the ground so I put the blood wheel right on the peg and then asked, that close enough and he stormed off. Then I moved it as there was not enough space for the awning where he wanted me.

I have a friend where they share the driving and she does of the backing. This includes the coupling and the backing into a site etc. He directs and she drives EVERY time.

We all have those days when we get it wrong. With me, take my trailer off me and I get lost as I am used to allowing for the swing of the trailer first so I often go the wrong way when just the bus. I have driven for around 4 years with the trailer attached so I can back down a lane or do a three point no worries with the trailer but have to think when it is not there or I am in someone elses car.

Just get one with your travels and enjoy what ever you do.

Not long and you will be home planning your next trip

Regards
Brian

Wizardofoz · Guru

Well, I would have certainly offered to assist and would have politely asked, I would hope that my question was answered either way, equally as politely.

The offer of help and civility should never be scorned.

-- Edited by Wizardofoz on Tuesday 4th of December 2012 09:08:15 AM

fireheart · Senior Member

I would like to add my thoughts on this subject, however I will zip it. Suffice to say I just hope that when I am enventually out on the road I come across you Brian and if I need help there will be a gentleman willing to help or a lady, I do not mind.

Sharon.

oldboar · Senior Member

I still like to hold doors open, etc for ladies but I think if I had one rude enough to get upset about it & I had time, I'd shut the bloody thing in her face. One funny story my brother tells - while reversing in to hook up his van, an old fellow rushed in waving his arms & issueing directions. Ross merely kept watching his reversing camera, stopping with the ball directly under the ball. Ross laughed & didn't have the heart to tell why when the old bloke yelled at his wife "see, why can't you do it like that?"

Darrell

Nomad246 · Senior Member

Absolutely agree Oldboar, Fireheart and Beiffe.

Some people just make true the old saying, "damned if you do and damned if you don't"

I don't remember the question on my drivers licence exam that it is permissable to use the excuse of fatigue and bad attitude for poor vehicle operation and control.

gst · Senior Member

Well having six sisters who all can multi task I'm very willing to sit back and watch even my wife is very good at multi tasking and is a very good at towing the van I even sleep while she drives but she'll tell you she won't back the van I'm allowed to do that.

Rip and Rosie · Guru

Best ways to meet blokes

I've had friends say go do your groceries after dark, do a lawn mover maintanance course, move to an army or mining town, go online....etc, etc

But the easiest way is to take the van to any CP and after finding a spot, attempt to put up your annex on your own.

Within 5 minutes you will have your choice. Any fellow left over after abour 40 minutes (which is when the wives come to claim them) is free.

Now, I say this from an observer's perspective

p.s
only works for women

steve1945 · Member

I'm glad we are grey.

We can display a little chauvinism without being labelled chauvinist. You can be feminine and don't have to be feminist.

the rocket · Guru

Rip and Rosie wrote:
Best ways to meet blokes

I've had friends say go do your groceries after dark, do a lawn mover maintanance course, move to an army or mining town, go online....etc, etc

But the easiest way is to take the van to any CP and after finding a spot, attempt to put up your annex on your own.

Within 5 minutes you will have your choice. Any fellow left over after abour 40 minutes (which is when the wives come to claim them) is free.

Now, I say this from an observer's perspective

gotta love that observation. you made my day.

p.s
only works for women

Hylda&Jon · Guru

I bought a 12v plugin jack incase Hylda gets caught out with a flat but I think she would have trouble with the wheelnuts anyway. Even I had trouble with them last time I had a flat. The tyre sale places sometimes do them up unnecessarily tight with those air guns so I had to use a metel tube to lengthen the wheelnut spanner for more leverage.

BTW Beth, if your heading south, Hylda makes a good cuppa if you feel like one, & a chat when passing through Grafton. Message us if you want.

Cheers

Jon.

oldboar · Senior Member

A LADY wouldn't, Janette. A LADY may politely refuse assistance as is her right, but no offer to help deserves abuse.

Darrell

-- Edited by oldboar on Tuesday 4th of December 2012 08:56:22 PM

turbopete · Senior Member

Hi Beth no i did not take offence ,,,,, unfortunately my puter email died on thursday last and have just fixed it,,,,,,,and have changed to from optus to bigpond,,,,, will alter my profile soon,,, enjoy it