A young cowboy, sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, recognized an elderly man standing at the bar who, in his day, had been the fastest gun in the West.
The young cowboy took a place next to the ol'-timer, bought him a drink and told him of his ambition to be a great shot... "Could you give me some tips?" he asked.
The ol'-timer said, "Well, for one thing, you're wearing your gun too high tie the holster a little lower down on your leg."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the cowboy.
"Sure will," replied the ol' man.
The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his .44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player.
"That's terrific!" said the cowboy. "Got any more tips?"
"Yep," said the ol'-timer. "Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it - that'll give you a smoother draw."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young cowboy.
"You bet it will," said the ol'-timer.
The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur and then shot a cuff link off the piano player.
"Wow!" exclaimed the cowboy. "I'm learnin' somethin' here. Got any more tips?" he asked again.
The ol'-timer pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. "See that axle grease over there? Coat your gun with it."
The young shooter smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.
"No," said the ol'-timer, "I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young cowboy.
"No" said the ol'-timer, "But when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano, he's gonna shove that gun up your ass and it won't hurt near as much."
